Horns of a Dilemma
by Niqsta
Summary: Squall & Rinoa. What was supposed to be the start of an epic romance spiralled into a web of complications. Like the horns of a dilemma, choosing your responsibility for the entire world over the one you love is never easy and always at a price. Postgame
1. Promises

**A/N: **This is my first postgame story and let me tell you, I was very nervous to write it. I tend to stay away from postgame stories (well writing them at least) because I'm always afraid of messing it up. But having read so many good stories of 'what happened next…' I just had to give in and try it out.

Firstly, I would like to thank **Ashbear** for her incredible stories over the past ten years that we have all enjoyed immensely. Her plot and writing is something I enjoy so much and I feel so fortunate that she writes for the FF8 fandom. Also, a major huge thanks for being such a good, supportive friend and for being kind enough to go over this fic for me. I truly wouldn't have had the courage to keep writing let alone post this fic without her encouragement and kind words.

Secondly, I am aware of the many theories rampant among the FF8 community. And while some theories have always seemed to be true, I did a lot of research (Final Fantasy Wiki) and found out a lot of them were 'fanon' and not 'canon' (props to Ashbear for the definitions). Two major theories will have a part in this fic: sexual contact and childbirth, both of which you will see which direction I have taken, either fanon or canon.

Thank you to everyone for all your support and I really hope I don't mess this one up.

**-Niqsta**

* * *

><p><strong>Horns of a Dilemma<strong>

**Squall and Rinoa - What was supposed to be the start of an epic romance spiralled into a web of complications. Like the horns of a dilemma, choosing your responsibility for the entire world over the one you love is never easy and always at a price. **

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 1 – Promises<strong>

It would have almost been a feeling of déjà vu had Dollet Beach not drastically improved over the last year with holiday Villas, beach chairs, cafés and souvenir shops. From what Squall could remember of his first trip to Dollet were the cobblestone footpaths, the deserted Galbadian occupied streets, and a very large mechanical spider chasing him down the sandy, polluted beach. What he wouldn't give to go back to that day. It was surprising for him to feel this way; nostalgia for a mechanical spider that was intent on ripping every single limb from his body. But it was the hindsight behind that day; it was the start of something great. It was the beginning of his future. It was also the night he had met her.

He had stood in this spot before; well actually he had tripped over the pedestrian road above him, fell smack onto the spot, before cursing to himself and running like mad towards the SeeD vessel. But even back then he hadn't known where that small step would have taken him. At the time, the only thing on his mind was preventing an impending death. He went from being at the front, leading Zell and Selphie away from the mechanical spider, to somehow being the last one behind.

It was that damn dog! The golden retriever, which he just _had _to make sure got out of the way from being turned into mince meat. That, and extra SeeD points. Somehow he had gotten left behind and to make matters worse, he tripped and lunged forward to avoid his head being splattered across the beach. But even so, he had a nagging thought in his head that his life was over. That all it took was the claw of X-ATM092 to pierce through his body and that was the end of both his life and being a Garden cadet.

He had to remember to thank Quistis, he was astonished that over a year on and he still hadn't thanked her for saving his life.

It shouldn't have crossed his mind, but he couldn't help but wonder what life would have been like had he given up. Had he lay there and allowed the machine to delve into him. He hadn't of course. At that time, there was no knowledge of what he knew now. At that time, all he saw and sought was to be the best damn SeeD ever. He didn't know he'd meet her. He didn't know that all he'd want in life was her. That knowledge he possessed now, and it bloody well sucked that he could do nothing about it.

Squall lowered himself onto the soft, yellow sand in a sitting position, sighing in what may have seemed like defeat. But it was more like despair. What was he to do? He had no answers. In actuality, there was no question about it. This was his life, regardless of whether he chose it, or had it chosen for him. He was Squall Leonhart; Headmaster of Balamb Garden, saviour of the entire world. That title alone came at a cost and unfortunately for him, it was at the expense of his happiness with her.

He lowered his head and sighed again, her words screamed in his ears as that familiar feeling came tugging at his heart. He had never seen her so hurt, never seen her so angry at him. Her words were engraved in his memory, and the feeling that followed permanently resided in his heart.

"_Empty promises, Squall. That's all you're ever good for!"_

And how true it was.

* * *

><p><em>One Year Earlier<em>

_**-October-**  
><em>

It was a feeling of excitement, exhilaration, euphoria and anxiety mixed altogether. No one could describe or make similarities to what the victory of defeating the world's malevolent Sorceress of all time felt like. Neither could the young Knight and Sorceress describe the emotions that were coursing through their body as they broke away from their first kiss and rested their heads against each other.

For Squall, it was very adventurous and brave of him to initiate something so intimate. He had fought with his inner-self, and won by the looks of it, about how this would weaken his suave and reserved exterior. But the timing was perfect; a shooting star symbolic to the start of something great. The last one of those he had seen led him to his adventures with her. He was certain this one would also be the start of something wonderful.

Rinoa had accepted the kiss willingly and made him feel at ease when her hands had eventually wrapped around his neck and her body pushed against his. If it hadn't been for the lack of breath in his lungs, he wouldn't have pulled away. Why hadn't Odine created some form of para-magic to allow lengthily first kisses?

He smiled at her without saying a word. Her eyes were saying a lot more to him. She wanted him to do _that_ again. He laughed softly against her; she knew full well that he was onto what she was after. But he was a SeeD; it was only natural that he would suspect a certain brunette couple hiding behind the pillar, cursing at the perfectly ill-timed uncharged camera. Sure they had no way of recording any more intimacies between Squall and Rinoa, but he had no doubt that the green-eyed brunette would gather all their friends, not to mention the entire CC Club, for a live performance.

Squall pulled his head away from Rinoa, delicately letting go of her waist and held her hands. He didn't need to speak; she would follow wherever he would take her. Whether that was to the flower fields in Centra, or to the Balamb cafeteria, she would not object to follow. They walked hand in hand, revelling at the close proximity of each other and the emotions of finally being able to be together.

They strolled smoothly, with obvious unnoticed pretence of the hundred eyes watching, as they quietly made their way out of the large ballroom and into the Garden lobby. It wouldn't be a couple of hours until they finally landed in Balamb, but for the Sorceress and Knight they had all the time in the world.

Starting from tonight.

It was quiet and peaceful as they made their way around the lobby and walked into the dorms. It took shaking hands for Squall to pull his keycard out and swipe it against the mechanism outside his dorm room, before being able to hold it open for her. She smiled cheekily at him before stepping in and looking around his room with new found interest. She had been in here before, both times uninvited. This time, however, felt completely new; he had wanted her to come and join him, he wanted her presence around him.

It was exactly as she remembered it a couple of weeks ago, before her comatose status. His white walls were bare with only a coat hanger to one side above his bed. His desk was just an arms length away from his bed, right next to his gunblade case. The blinds were drawn and allowed no light to seep in from the dark sea that they flew over. That was soon taken care of when Squall turned on his desk lamp, allowing the room to be filled with a dim yellow light, resulting in a subtle romantic ambience that Squall surely didn't intend.

He took off his shoes, disposing them neatly into his closet and took off his leather jacket, placing it on an iron hanger before hanging it up on his coat rack. Rinoa mimicked his actions and also took of her blue duster, leaving it resting on his desk chair and kicking her shoes off to one corner.

It wasn't cold in the room, but she decided leaving her socks on as she crawled onto the bed and lay onto his open arms. Her head nestled safely on the crook of his neck, they both wrapped their arms around each other in a hugging position. She could smell the mixture of cologne and leather on him and allowed it to cement her memory.

"I never once thought that you of all people, would invite me back to your room," Rinoa finally spoke, chuckling against his chest.

"Well. . ." Squall paused thinking to himself, "I never once thought that I'd be inviting you of all people, back to my room," he rebutted, getting a nudge in the ribs from her in return.

She moved her head upwards, gazing into his steel-blue eyes earnestly. It was those eyes that had caught her attention only a couple of months ago in that grand hall. Never did she imagine that it'd lead to saving the world, or that she'd be lying on a bed, staring lovingly into them. It was fate after all, how one single glance at a shooting star caused her to spot him. How he, of all SeeDs, was assigned to help her on her mission, and how everything else spiralled into a dream like fantasy with a very sweet ending.

But for both the Sorceress and Knight, it wasn't an ending, in fact, it was only the start of a new beginning. A continuation of what happens next.

"What are you thinking about?" she asked softly in fear of someone overhearing.

It was pretty silly really, everyone else was at the party enjoying themselves, and hardly anyone was ready to retire to bed. But she felt the need to whisper for his closure more than hers. It wasn't very often that Squall opened up to people, and it wasn't very often they had time along together.

"You," he replied straight away, not taking his eyes off her.

She blushed lowering her eyes back to his chest and held him tighter. It had put a wide grin on her face to say the least; a lot of Squall's actions tonight were doing that.

"What about me?" she asked cheekily curious to know what was going on in her Knight's mind.

"Just thinking about how close I was to losing you," he said with seriousness and an air of present fear.

Her giddy emotion was cut off as the sense of a similar fear came back to haunt her. It was sheer panic and grief that coursed through her body when she had found him lying on a solid rock floor, seemingly unconscious and with only the faintest sign of a heartbeat. It scared her to see him in that position and the memories of finding his cold body sprawled out flat, brought fresh tears to her eyes.

She sat up and wiped her eyes, causing him to repeat her actions, albeit without the tears, and hold her in his arms once again. He smoothed down her hair and held her tight until she regained composure.

"You don't know how scared I was when I saw you lying there," she managed after a sob. "The first thought that came to my head was how unfair it was. I thought you were dead, Squall. I thought it was unfair that you'd go through the ordeal of saving the world and not even be here to enjoy it."

He smiled instantly, letting a small amused chuckle out.

"There's no way I'd save the world and not be allowed to enjoy the after party," he remarked while still smiling at her. "And there's no way I'd go through all of that and not be able to enjoy a future with you. Sure, I saved the world because it was my mission, but see, there was this girl next to me encouraging me and supporting me along the way that I had to thank. There's no way I would have gone so easily."

She smiled back at his kind words, smiled harder because she knew they were meant from the heart.

"So, how do you plan on thanking this girl?" she asked cheekily, hoping she'd be rewarded with the same prize she had won in the balcony only minutes ago.

It was a simple question really, but for Squall it flipped his heart over and resulted in a shuddering breath that followed. Squall Leonhart was truly nervous and not by an impending battle.

"That's a good question," he stated, nodding his head and concentrating on the rings adorning Rinoa's neck.

Rinoa looked closely at him, inspecting his face peculiarly. It was the answer that she expected; just the concentrated tone that complimented it was very different. Although it was Squall Leonhart, she had more than expected him to cheekily state the reply and bend down and kiss her.

"Squall?" Rinoa finally managed to slip out worriedly.

"Rinoa, will you marry me?" he finally blurted out, more as plea rather than a question.

Immediately, he could see her eyes widen in shock and her face contort to amusement. It only took a moment before she let a heartily chuckle out, her hands trying hard to stifle the giggles before looking at his unchanged expression.

"Oh, you're serious?" she asked guilty.

Biting her bottom lip, she turned her body full circle to face him properly and hold his hands in her cupped ones. She smiled at him reassuringly, the giggles inside her being contained to further prevent hurting his feelings.

"Squall, why do you want to marry me?" she couldn't help but question.

It was strange for her to hear such a request from him; she completely hadn't expected him to ask her anything pertaining to a relationship. She herself wasn't entirely sure if the kiss that they had shared was some form of a deposit in their new found relationship. Rinoa surely wouldn't go as far as calling herself his girlfriend until he himself had stated it.

Squall lowered his head and thought about his answer. It wasn't how he had expected her to react. It was peculiar that he hadn't exactly thought this through, it surely wasn't the way a SeeD, let alone the commander of SeeD would act.

Normally such life changing decisions were thought out, planned and executed only when there were substantial favours. But it all boiled down to what Squall had experienced; no other SeeD member went through his experiences in Time Compression. No one else, had to experience the deletion of a loved one from their memory. No one else, saw a possibility of life without a loved one. He had. He could still remember each flashback, every moment he had spent with Rinoa, leading up to the events with Ultimecia, being erased from his mind. It was strange, it was empty and it was cold. He didn't want his future to be described with those attributes and so he had asked her the question to make his future bright, warm and complete.

"Rinoa," he started, looking solemnly into her eyes, "when I was in Time Compression, I had these flashbacks of every moment we shared, starting from the ballroom dance you dragged me to," he lightly laughed, "through garden flying over the wide Balamb Plains, and even down to you in space."

He breathed hard and briefly looked around the dimly lit room. It was a lot to comprehend, a lot to explain but it was required for his appeal. She looked at him with a genuine smile and held his hand tighter for him to continue.

"Every image I saw in front of me, just scared me to think of a life without you. Everything I saw, just reminded me of the time I lost you in space, all those feelings of despair and loneliness came back to me and I thought I'd never get that chance. When I held you on the Ragnorak, I know I acted distant, but I just didn't know how to be around you; I was a bit embarrassed," he confessed lowering his gaze to their clasped hands.

How he was to explain this was beyond him. He didn't want to scare her away, but he needed to expression his need for her.

"When I was experiencing those flashbacks, I thought that was it. I'd never get that Ragnorak scene back and be able to really hold you, really tell you how I feel," he frowned at the thought.

"How do you feel?" Rinoa asked softly, placing a small hand on his cheek, it was almost unheard by the loud beating at Squall's chest.

He swallowed hard clearing his throat and looked at her determinedly.

"I love you," he answered easily.

The bashful smile was back on her lips as she looked at him shyly. That was not something she ever expected Squall Leonhart to say, especially to her. He found her annoying, stubborn and completely irresponsible. To have feelings like that, especially so strong was beyond imaginable. But completely identical to how she felt about him.

"Squall, I love you too," she replied with ease and lent towards him to place a soft kiss on his lips.

Breaking away, she held his cheek in her cupped hand and spoke softly, adding as much comfort she needed not to hurt his feelings.

"But, I can't marry you . . . not now anyway," she quickly added when she saw the disappointment in his eyes. "Let me explain," she prepared herself shaking herself mentally and blinking hard.

It was at times like this, Rinoa really noticed how quiet the room was, and how loud the ticking of his clock matched the beats to her heart.

"Squall, when you kissed me on the balcony, I wasn't expecting it. I didn't even know what it meant, or why you did it. I don't even know what we are, are we a couple?"

It wasn't a direct question, but the Commander felt as if he should answer.

"Of course," he replied instantly.

She smiled at him, her amusement visible in her grin. "Well, that's good to know," she paused as she tried to remember her point.

"Growing up I've done a lot of hasty things, I think running away from home and joining a resistance faction has to be the biggest blunder in my actions . . . depending on how you look at it." She winked cheekily. "But I don't want to be that girl anymore."

"I don't get what you're saying," Squall stated shaking his head.

"Squall, this is the start of something new and I don't want to taint it with my irresponsible actions. I can't be the carefree seventeen year old princess I was before today. Now, my actions really do have a domino affect, especially since the whole world will be on my tail," she replied with distress.

This time it was Squall's turn to tighten his hold on her. He had nearly forgotten that little small print, she was still a sorceress and there was no refund on that little purchase.

"Anything I do now will affect the world, I can't afford to be hasty and follow my desires. I do Squall; I really do want to marry you," she replied, her voice getting that bit emotional and quick. "But, I don't want to rush into anything and then for us to regret it after."

"Why would we regret this?" he couldn't help but ask.

He couldn't deny his hurt, he understood her reasons when it came to the overall population of the earth, but he had hoped to tell them that their marriage was the fee for saving the world. But this new reason Rinoa was proposing was causing him to question her insecurities.

"Squall, we've just defeated a sorceress from the future. You're the world's saviour and most probably have carried out the essence of what SeeD is about. We're emotional and tired and I don't want you to ask me something today and regret it tomorrow," she answered assuredly. "I don't want any regrets between us."

"Rinoa, do you really think that I would ask you something from the top of my head?" he asked.

"No," she had to admit, the Commander of SeeD rarely ever had sporadic moments of emotional expression. In fact, the only time she remembered him acting spontaneously was when he came to save her from the Sorceress' Memorial.

"I wouldn't ask you to marry me if I believed it was something I would live to regret," he answered confidently.

"I know, Squall," she nodded, although her feelings of anxiety and fear hadn't dissipated. "But, I can't say yes when . . ."

Rinoa got off the bed, unable to finish her sentence and started pacing the small space in his room. What was she so scared about? She was with Squall; she never felt scared or ever became speechless around him. Yet here she was, unable to express her reasons. To any girl it would have been a dream to marry the Commander of SeeD, especially seeing as he just went and saved the world's butt from near apocalypse. But something was making her apprehensive and it literally was down to every other thing never lasting in her life.

Her mother had died when she was five. By sixteen her relationship with her father had deteriorated, her first crush had gone and nearly sacrificed her to a Sorceress and now that the world was saved . . . she had no where to go. She belonged no where. So, why was she saying no? Surely, Squall could put new meaning in her life. Surely, Squall would make her feel wanted.

"Squall. . . " she looked at him desperately, "I don't want to say yes and have you realise you don't love me in the morning, or the next day or the next year. I don't want to rush into anything and then regret my actions. That's all I've been doing so far."

She bent down, leaning against the white bare wall and pulled her legs upto her chest, hugging them tightly. She was doing the right thing; she was preventing herself from making the same mistakes all over again. But even so, she felt cheated; a part of her wanted to jump in joy and accept his proposal. But the mature part of her that was slowly increasing, knew she was doing the right thing for both of them, even though it hurt.

Squall slowly eased himself off his bed and lowered himself in front of her. Pulling her head up so she could look into his eyes, he spoke with conviction.

"Rinoa, asking you to spend the rest of your life with me, is something I'll never regret."

She had to smile at his perseverance, she had almost expected him to agree with her reasons and take back his offer.

"If that is true, then the next time you ask me, I will say yes," she answered and quickly put a finger to his lips. "But not tonight," she said quick and laughed.

"All right," he complied and couldn't help but smile. "I'll prove to you that it's something I'll never regret . . . and neither will you. I promise," he said confidently.

She pulled his head closer and kissed him again.

Squall understood her reasons, it was true that they were very emotional and excited and it was only reasonable that she'd relate his proposal to the euphoria of their victory. However, her anxieties and insecurities stemmed from a part of her life that affected her at a deeper level than she let on.

He would win her over; prove to her that his proposal wasn't in haste or without resolute. He would ask her again once she felt comfortable with him and assured of his feeling for her. It was a promise.

* * *

><p>She should have been asleep, she should have been in bed, she should have been lounging in her dorm room enjoying the overdue week off, anything but donned in her SeeD outfit, walking down the Garden Lobby, at nine in the morning.<p>

Quistis couldn't help it; she wasn't like the others, she couldn't for the life of her remain in her quiet solitude staring at her blank walls. It wasn't in her nature to sit and read or watch TV when she knew stacks of paperwork were waiting for her in her office. Of course, she had a week's break that most definitely didn't include any form of Garden or SeeD related work. All fun and play, but Quistis was already a dull person, or so she believed herself to be. So, here she was walking towards the elevator before selecting the 3F button and finally arriving at her office.

She had been right, stacks of SeeD reports lay waiting on her desk with many amounts of feedback forms. For the first time since she was allowed to contemplate on the matter, Quistis was very glad to have been demoted from her Instructor position.

There was hardly any possible way she'd have the time to get all those papers done and attend class.

Starting her morning ritual, Quistis walked over to the shared coffee station in the third floor lobby and made herself a strong black coffee. The cafeteria ladies had already stocked up on sweet confectionaries which she gladly helped herself too. It was something she was secretly thankful for; the freedom to enjoy her breakfast, lunch and dinner for that matter, in the confines of her office. She couldn't remember the last time she had actually enjoyed a peaceful meal in the cafeteria without the presence of a few persistent Trepies.

Walking back to her office, Quistis placed her coffee cup and iced-bun down on the table, licking the sugary residue left on her index finger. Opening up a window, she allowed the fresh Balamb salt air to fill the room. How she had missed the natural surroundings of Balamb. Indisputably, she along with the rest of the gang had loved Esthar, with its hi-tech transportation and its mass development. But nature always had a way to impress the blonde and right now as she stared at the sun rays hitting the crystal blue beach waters, she couldn't help the small smile spread across her face.

A knock on the door broke her from her moment of tranquillity. Turning around she called out for the person to come in, only finding the door opening to reveal Cid walking in with a cheeky smile on his face.

"I knew you would be here on your day off," he chuckled, getting straight to the point.

"You know me, Cid. Other than Garden, I have nothing else going on," she managed a lopsided smile, before attacking the papers in front of her. "See all this paperwork? I just couldn't possibly sit in my room all day knowing it was calling to me."

"Calling to you, eh?" Cid considered making his way over to the desk.

Both sat down opposite each other, Quistis choosing to sort her papers in respective piles while she awaited the reason for Cid's arrival. Taking his glasses off, the older man stared at Quistis with a jovial smile.

"You know, Quistis," he began, his smile never leaving, "I really enjoyed last night. I know Edea and I have been together for a month now but last night really cemented everything. Ultimecia has been defeated and now we can actually move on."

The blonde smiled at her Headmaster truly pleased for him. It was a start of something fresh for all of them. They had all been worried when they couldn't find Squall and then panic stricken when Rinoa suddenly disappeared. But after seeing her walk back with Squall leaning on her shoulders, fully conscious, they knew that they could truly be victorious. They had dined and celebrated deep into the night without a care in the world. As far as they were concerned they had none.

"I'm happy for you both, Cid," she inputted her support while busily placing each paper into their piles.

"Thank you," Cid nodded before taking in breath. "But you see Quistis, when Edea and I first started Garden; we trained SeeD for the battle against Ultimecia."

Quistis looked to her Headmaster wondering where the conversation was going. What he had said had been registered long before, they knew that was the meaning to SeeD; destroying sorceress, except the good ones.

"Now that you've all done what we set out for, I think its time Edea and I went back to the Orphanage," Cid finally concluded.

"What?" Quistis immediately asked.

It actually hadn't occurred to her that what Cid was saying was true. SeeD had done what it was initially expected to do. Any other mission they carried out was arbitrary compared to what they'd carried out last night. But even so, this surely couldn't be the end to Garden and all its SeeDs?

"I think it's time I retire and have someone else take over," Cid spoke more directly. "I'm old now and I want to spend the rest of my days peacefully with Edea."

"I understand," Quistis nodded her head. "But, Cid you practically built this place; who can take over and carry out the job to your expectations?"

It was a truth that had to be considered severely, Garden's success did rely on its SeeDs, but it also relied heavily on the one who trained them; Cid had been a continued support, a father figure to them all. With his absence, Garden would change drastically if the wrong person was appointed.

"Well, I do have someone in mind," he confessed.

* * *

><p>Squall opened his eyes to find his bedroom in the same dimly lit state he had fallen asleep. The desk lamp still shone from one corner of his room but mixed in with the hazy light seeping in from behind his blinds.<p>

His arm was all but dead by the weight of Rinoa's head resting quietly in deep sleep. They hadn't moved from their positions all night, the extreme fatigue clearly the cause of their minor death like slumber.

He looked at her asleep on his arm remembering the scenes of the night before. How excited and blissful they had been the entire night, even after she declined his offer of marriage. But that scene was taken with a pinch of salt. He shouldn't be hurt or feel any form of dejection. She hadn't rejected him per se, rather pleaded a better timing.

He had to agree that the timing, though perfectly in conjunction to a romantic prospect, swayed more to the idea of a hasty decision.

But he'd made a promise to prove that it wasn't offered in haste; he was serious about spending the rest of his life with her and he wanted it to be perfect. Nothing made him surer than his experiences through Time Compression. He had seen a life without Rinoa, a life which he thought would surely take place with his death. But he had survived and when he opened his eyes, it was her tearful face that he had seen first and he knew things would be all right.

Rinoa stirred in his arms, stretching out her legs and pushing up her arms from the tiredness. She had nearly knocked his head sideways had his reflexes not kicked in and just managed to duck. She opened her eyes, perplexed at the lack of room and stared into his eyes. It took a moment before it finally registered who she was lying next to, and not only that, but who she was currently half sleeping on top of.

Her face finally broke into a smile as she accepted a kiss from him atop of her head. She hugged his chest in bliss and rubbed her eyes from the tiredness.

"Morning," she spoke, her voice cracked from the morning sleep.

"Morning," he replied back. "First day back in Garden and you already have me breaking rules," he couldn't help but joke.

She giggled at his observation, before sitting up and staring at him with amusement.

"If I remember correctly, Commander Leonhart, but it was you who asked me to lay down next to you," she argued cutely.

"That I did," he nodded and sat up against his headboard. "But I didn't ask you to sleep."

"I couldn't help it, I was so tired. Why didn't you wake me?" she asked half in jest and half seriously.

He smiled at her genuinely before replying, "I didn't have the heart to wake you. Besides, it wouldn't have been very gentlemanlike if I woke you from sleep," he rebutted getting off the bed and opening his closet to get a towel.

"Hm. Well, wouldn't it have been very gentlemanlike if you had slept on the floor and allowed me the bed to myself?" Rinoa continued to argue cheekily.

He couldn't stop the smile creep up to his face, she had a point. But as she lay there in his arms he couldn't separate himself from her. He wanted and needed to be next to her, with her in his arms protecting her from any harm. He had never been so close to another person since Ellone had left the orphanage and he quite liked the close proximity Rinoa had offered him.

"It would have," Squall agreed. "But I couldn't break myself away."

She smiled at his honesty and got up to reward him. Half way into the kiss she abruptly pulled away, putting her hand to her mouth and looking up at him shyly.

"Sorry, my breath must reek," she admitted embarrassedly.

"Not at all," he replied ridding her of any further embarrassment. "But I think we both need to shower."

She smacked his arm lightly before leaning into a hug and resting her head on his shoulder.

It was a fresh day, a new start. They had anticipated this day, almost fearful it would not come or that they would never live to experience. But they had survived and finally for Rinoa and Squall, they believed it was a chapter to a bright new future.


	2. Improvements

**Chapter 2 – Improvements**

Squall had waited in his lounge area while Rinoa had gotten changed in his bedroom. Since she had slept over the night before, the Sorceress really had no other alternative to freshen herself up. Of course there were options, Selphie and Quistis wouldn't object to her using their facilities, but that choice would have required answers to where she had spent the night.

Not that anything had happened between Rinoa and Squall, and she surely wouldn't be ashamed of Squall if anything did, but she felt their new found relationship deserved a level of privacy and respect. It was really something Squall deserved after being so open with her.

The thoughts of the night came back to her as she brushed back her damp hair. He was very sweet, tender and loving. She hadn't experienced that sort of behaviour from him before and she quite liked to experience more. The last time Squall had ever been so close to her was back at the Sorceress's Memorial when he came to free her. Even that memory was something special. He had cut the cords releasing the gate and out she popped. Well, not popped, but fallen out more like it. He had caught her in his arms and held her tightly.

It was the same last night; he had held her hand and walked her to his room before opening his muscled arms to her and holding her into a tight hug. If any of those incidents had a blatant similarity, it was that Squall's expression of affection was only ever done when they were alone.

Of course that didn't mean he was ashamed of her, she knew that much, but Squall just wasn't very fond of public displays of affection. In fact, Squall couldn't even walk alongside any of the team members during the course of their mission. It didn't bother her; she wouldn't try and pry him out of his shell… well not too much.

She liked Squall's shyness, it always reminded her of the person he was, and how unique he was compared to the masses of confident obnoxious Galbadian guys she had met in her years.

Finally done with grooming herself, Rinoa opened Squall's bedroom door and headed on out to meet him in the small lounge. On seeing her enter, Squall immediately rose to his feet and greeted her with a thin smile.

"Ready to get breakfast?" She asked as she fastened the strap of her blue duster.

"I was thinking to eat in the cafeteria," he suggested.

"Sounds good," she compiled taking his hand and allowing him to lead the way.

* * *

><p>For the other SeeD members, the week off from Garden was Godsend. It was just what they needed after the entire Ultimecia ordeal. Even though Garden had held a huge party in their honour, they hadn't had the time to really sit and decide what their goals were. For Selphie and Zell it was their first mission and they were only looking forward to what they'd be up against now. For sure their first mission probably overqualified them for anything they were about to face, but it only psyched them up for future missions.<p>

Irvine was a different case. Having been the only one amongst them, not from Balamb Garden, he was seriously contemplating to apply for residence. Galbadia Garden was more or less in taters and scheduled for reconstruction. Trabia was no option having only been not even half way under construction, so the only realistic and plausible option was Balamb. Either way, he had been reunited with his friends and that reason alone weighed far more for a cause to stay.

It was while the three young combatants sat eating breakfast had Squall and Rinoa walked in. They all greeted each other and discussed their plans for the week off. Selphie had expressed her want of them all to gather at the beach and spend as much as time in Balamb as they could. Zell had plans to stay over at his mother's house, seeing as it was long overdue, and Irvine had many forms to fill in if he were to continue his stay at Balamb.

"What about you, Rinoa?" Selphie had asked.

It was a very good question and one Rinoa had not had the time to think about. Since Timber had now been freed, her contract with Garden had ceased as did her reason of stay. Rinoa wasn't a SeeD and she now more or less was no longer a client either.

"I'm not sure," she replied thinking to herself. "I think my time is up guys; I may have to leave."

She looked around, smiling at them thinly. It wasn't something she wanted to say and by the looks of it, it wasn't something they wanted to hear. Squall's facial expression wasn't obvious, but he was hurt by the realisation of her departure. Garden had strict rules about outsiders and there really was no reason Squall could think of for letting Rinoa stay. Either way, he still decided to be optimistic, something which took the others by surprise.

"I'm sure if you speak to Cid, he'd find some way for you to stay," Squall spoke, receiving surprised glances from his SeeD members.

For the group, Squall's new positive behaviour was new and blatant contrast of his earlier character.

"I don't know, Squall. I hardly doubt Cid will let me sponge of Garden's facilities forever," Rinoa expressed her concerns. "Maybe until I find a place of my own… and a job," she quickly added not wanting to dampen Squall's mood.

"You and me both," Irvine added straight away.

"You thinking of transferring?" Zell asked the brunette receiving a confirmatory nod.

"Sure am. Nothing left for me in Galbadia, besides I like it here in Balamb," he replied, his last comment directed more towards Selphie… and the three girls sitting directly behind her.

"Well, we should all head to Cid's office and speak to him. There will be paperwork to fill in for our completed mission," Squall remarked.

"Ah man, the downside of being a SeeD; bloody paperwork!" Zell scoffed from the other side of the table.

For Zell, paperwork was a big obstacle, he had never liked filling out tonnes of forms, especially ones that required detailed descriptions of things he could hardly remember. Zell's knowledge always had gaps; he knew beginning and end, but rarely remembered what went on in between. It was excruciating for him to even fill in his Library card form, although for that, he had gotten help from a very cute pigtailed girl, and even that came with advantages he hadn't known at the time.

"Well, let's get going," Squall's instinct of leadership came naturally as he stood up and awaited Rinoa to do the same. The others all followed suit as they made their way out of the cafeteria and down the lobby to the elevator.

Within that time, Rinoa had plenty of opportunity to really think things through. Could she possibly ask Cid if there was a chance for her to stay? If there was, would it entail her becoming a SeeD? She remembered questioning such a life only a couple of months ago and she stood by what she had said. Rinoa Heartilly wasn't capable of becoming a SeeD; she could not accept life as a string of orders without questioning the moral or ethic values. But even so, she wished for the sake of her friends that there was a way for her to remain at Garden, that maybe Cid and any other party currently in charge of Garden, would allow her to keep residence.

They had arrived at the third floor and made their way over to Cid's office while waiting for him to allow them to enter. Walking into the room Squall found not only Cid in his office but Quistis as well as Martine.

"I hope we're not interrupting," Squall quickly apologised while giving his salute.

"No not at all, though seeing you all here, I hope nothing is wrong," Cid worriedly asked briefly standing up.

"We all just had a few things to discuss," Squall answered getting to the point.

Rinoa looked around the room nervously at the other two occupants next to Cid.

Quistis wasn't someone she was embarrassed to speak in front of, but she would have preferred not to speak about her plea in front of Martine. It wasn't that she didn't like the man; he was one of the top leaders of Galbadia Garden and had many similarities to her father. But that was the point. He was like her father and once hearing that she was intending on sponging of Garden's facilities, she doubted he'd like the sound of that.

"Ah, well that's good to hear. I have a few things to discuss too but, one at a time, eh?" Cid chuckled, looking at the five teenagers in front of him.

"Well mine is really short," Irvine quickly interjected, "I just wanted to see… if erm there was a… a possible chance for me to transfer… here," he managed to say while keeping his gaze off Martine.

The Sharpshooter hadn't expected his former leader to be present and he sure didn't want to seem disrespectful to ask for such a request and seem inconsiderate. He would thank Martine for the opportunity at Galbadia, but Balamb was now his home.

"Oh, well of course there is. But you'd have to see Xu in the next room; she'll sort out all the necessary paper work for you." Cid replied with a smile.

He was more than happy to oblige, with the current mission over and the loss during the Galbadia and Balamb conflict, it was only necessary to increase Balamb's numbers. Besides, they needed more sharpshooters with Irvine's skills and precise aims. What with the final showdown last night, Irvine only needed to complete the written test and he was a SeeD for sure.

Nodding at both men, Irvine quickly made his way out of the office with Zell following in pursuit. Selphie stepped forward with a cheerful smile that Cid knew it only meant one thing.

"Can I start recruiting for the Garden Festival Committee?" Selphie asked, her hands placed together in plea.

"Sure, why not," Cid obliged again, causing a squeak from the young girl who expressed her thanks and skipped outside.

With only the two older men in the room and Quistis, Rinoa and Squall were a little more at ease about their situation. But only a little. Squall had given a small nod to Rinoa as a go ahead of her cause, but seeing Martine in the room she felt very apprehensive to ask. It was only natural that Martine would suggest she return to her father, he probably was in contact with her father seeing as they both worked in similar lines of employment. Besides, it was Martine who had sent them to Caraway during their mission against Vinzer Deling and he had no knowledge about who she was at the time. She was sure he knew full well exactly who she was now.

"Who is next?" Cid teasingly asked, looking from Squall to Rinoa.

"I can leave if you want?" Quistis asked, getting off her chair in preparation.

"No!" Rinoa cried almost too quickly.

The blonde remained stationary, abiding her friend's orders. She wasn't sure what Rinoa wanted to speak to Cid about, but she sensed her own presence was something the Sorceress needed.

"Ah, I… I just wanted to ask if… erm I need a place to stay," Rinoa barely managed to make out. She sighed inwardly at her lack of an articulated sentence.

"Oh," Cid nodded, realising the Sorceress's predicament. He had actually forgotten the small details that she wasn't a SeeD and that her contract with Garden was at an end.

"Well, I'm sure we could sort something out here."

"Really! I'd be willing to take on any work - paperwork that is!" She quickly corrected herself. There was no way she'd accidentally apply herself into a SeeD apprenticeship of any sort.

"That's not necessary, besides we have certain rules pertaining to outsiders and SeeD work," Cid clarified. "But, I'm sure the Library staff could use some help."

"Thank you, I'll speak to someone at the Library," Rinoa grinned at the man.

"Good. You can sort out residence with Xu, she's next door," Cid offered.

Smiling, Rinoa turned to Squall with raised eyebrows. It looked like she'd be staying after all. He couldn't help but allow a thin smile at his lips; he was pleased as much as she was that she didn't have to leave. It would hardly be easier for him to win her over with her having to return to Galbadia.

Taking his hand in hers she turned around and was about to leave when Cid called out to Squall.

"We need to have word," he smiled at the commander hoping not to alarm him in anyway.

"Okay," Squall said looking back at Rinoa. "I'll meet you in the cafeteria."

The Sorceress nodded and made her way out of the room, closing the door behind her. Now that she was gone, Squall turned to face the other three people in the room awaiting his attention.

"Have a seat, Squall," Cid motioned to the empty chair next to Quistis.

Squall walked over to the chair and pulled it outward, slowly easing himself down and looking back up to Cid. Martine stood in his position, behind the desk near Cid's left, observing the two SeeDs in front of him.

"We have already spoken to Quistis, so she'll have to sit here and go through the explanation again," Cid lightly chuckled before continuing, "I've come to a decision that I should retire now."

Squall instantly frowned at the Headmaster's words, wondering what brought on this sudden decision. Seeing his frowned face, Cid held up a hand to allow him to continue, although the Commander hadn't said anything.

"Edea and I set up Garden to destroy the Sorceress from the future. You all have done just that. That was my goal and I can happily say that I am at ease to retire. I'm getting old and I want to spend the rest of my time with Edea." He explained.

That was all it took for Squall to understand. Of course, it was simple and expected that now Edea was no longer a Sorceress, Cid would want to go back to being a couple. He had done something similar only a while ago when he had made Squall Commander and toddled off to Centra to join his dear wife. But that just left the question begging to be asked. Who would take on as Headmaster?

"I know what you must be thinking; Quistis asked the very same thing," Cid answered, as if reading the Commander's thoughts. "I decided that you both are far too qualified for your positions. Quistis, I am afraid we underestimated you and judged you too quickly. We should never have demoted you on the basis of one rogue cadet. We can clearly see from Squall's behaviour and success that you were indeed a fine instructor."

The Headmaster got off his seat and walked to his window, overlooking the lobby down below. He could see new cadets walking the halls all eager to join and become the next best SeeD. In fact, it seemed only a week ago he himself had trained the first batch of SeeDs along with Edea.

"The same with you Squall, your actions last night showed that you are more than just a Commander," he continued before turning to face the two SeeDs. "Myself and Martine have come to an arrangement," he said, reminding the two of the other man's presence.

Martine's facial expression hadn't changed through the course of Cid's speech. He still remained stoic and lifeless in his standing position. Of course, he more than agreed with Cid of the current proposal at hand, it was a benefit to him, the two SeeDs in front of him and Garden alone.

"I will retire and hand the Headmaster position to you Squall."

"What?" Squall couldn't help but feel shocked. He was more than expecting Quistis to take over, never did he imagine the title to be handed to him so easily and especially after only one mission. He looked to the blonde sitting next to him, smiling brightly at him. She was happy for him and seemed to agree with Cid's observations.

"You will be the Headmaster of Balamb Garden; I think you're more the capable of the job. As for Quistis, she will take over your position as the Commander, as she too has shown she is more than capable," Cid continued. "As for Martine here, we've set up an initiative. All Gardens will now have an acting Governor on their behalf; Martine will be Balamb's acting Governor. The Governors all come together to form an alliance and find common ground. We don't want a repeat of what happened between Balamb and Galbadia, and I am sure that once all Gardens are working alongside each other, things will work a lot smoother."

"But who will manage Galbadia's Garden?" Squall asked curiously.

"The new Headmaster, Diego Dorres, while their Governor is Nigel Jones," Cid answered. It was obvious these matters had already been sorted out, at least for Galbadia who had more or less surrendered after they had been beaten just before Rinoa went into comatose.

Squall had wondered when he met Martine, sitting outside the Dobe's house while on his ridiculous quest to get his Ifrit card back, what the Headmaster's plans were for the future. He had his Garden stolen for him right under his nose and it now seemed there was never an option to go back.

"What is expected of the Governors?" Quistis spoke softly next to Squall. She too wanted to know more about the new addition to her work force. It would be fine and dandy working alongside Squall, but apart from the one mission in Galbadia she hadn't properly worked with Martine to know what was expected. Sure Martine had asked for forgiveness and repented for his deception on their earlier quest to defeat Sorceress Edea, Quistis held some scepticism towards the man's sincerity.

"My position in this Garden is to help you all. The Headmaster is the forefront of the Garden, he is in charge and most orders will be executed by him. But there are things which require much more thought out decisions, a stronger sense of judgment and vast knowledge and experience. The Governor has these qualities and aids the Garden that he is assigned to working alongside the Headmaster," Martine explained, finally speaking for the first time.

"While you have all been defeating what was Garden's foremost goal, we've been discussing this matter; how to improve Garden for the years to come," Cid informed the two. "I'm very positive that such a connection will integrate all Gardens and we won't have a repetition of what happened weeks ago," he added, sending Martine a hopeful glance.

Squall thought about what they had said carefully. It was a positive improvement to the situation at hand; sure Balamb Garden was responsible for conquering the Sorceress from the future and most probably would receive encouraging support, but there was the other important issue of internal conflict between the Gardens. The Commander wasn't sure whether Galbadia Garden had fully recovered after the Galbadian Army had taken over and what their stance was towards Balamb.

"So Squall, what are you thinking?" Cid asked, breaking Squall from his reverie.

It was the question he was troubled by. It was a very good opportunity for him and the other SeeDs. But was he ready? Physically, he needed time to restore his health and mentally, he needed a lot of time to get over his last battle. In essence, he had only carried out one mission since becoming a SeeD, although the mission was probably the weight of fifty A rank missions. No other SeeD ever travelled through time and defeated roughly ten sorceresses before defeating the Ultimate sorceress of all time.

"Can I think about it?" Squall asked taking a breath.

Cid merely smiled and nodded. Of course he expected the answer. It was all Cid could do but offer the position to Squall and give him the time to think about it, rather than shove it down his throat like he did with the Commander title. That hadn't gone down too well with Squall resulting in one of his sporadic moments of anguish. Had it not been for the impending doom against Galbadia, Cid was sure he would have been a victim of many meteor spells.

"Of course, but I'm afraid I shall be taking leave by next week," Cid added cheekily.

Squall groaned internally. Sure he had the time to think, but it was limited. It didn't matter, he couldn't give an answer straight away, there was too much already going on in his head that he needed what little time he could get to properly think things through.

"In the meantime, Martine will be shadowing me. So, Quistis you really should take advantage of your break," Cid teased the blonde.

"You know me, Cid, I crave for work," she joked back.

For Quistis, there really was no choice. She had been hurt when they had stripped her of her Instructorship, it was an obvious statement that she lacked in leadership qualities and had no control over her students. Maybe her charms didn't work so well on her students. But this new career option was a greater compliment paid to her and she was very glad that it was offered to her.

The two SeeDs soon left the two Headmasters in the quiet office to go in search of their friends and relate to them the good news. After a good couple of minutes had passed, Martine had to voice his concerns.

"Cid, do you really think it's wise to let Rinoa stay here?" He asked with frowned curiosity.

"I don't see the problem," Cid replied not at all bothered.

Cid had taken a particular interest in Rinoa the night he had met her at the inauguration ball. It had been the night, the start of the entire plan he and Edea had set out. He had not expected Rinoa of all people to ask for his help, such a small handful of people set out to free Timber, free them from Vinzer Deling and his possessed wife. But that was all it took, a handful of people with strong determination, belief and the purest intentions to take down evil sorceresses and save the world.

Rinoa was a part of that handful and his hospitality to her was a form of his gratitude.

"Cid, are you forgetting that she is a sorceress? I don't think the other Gardens are going to be overjoyed to find out that we're housing the only living sorceress," Martine continued to express his concerns.

"Rinoa is not that kind of sorceress. Besides, what do they have to be worried about? The sorceresses of our time are not like those of Adel and Ultimecia," Cid argued.

"How do you know? How can we assure people that she isn't a threat?" Martine rebutted feeling very uncomfortable with the concept.

"Oh Martine, I've heard this all before. Rinoa is a human first and foremost; her sorceress powers will not be an issue because Ultimecia has been defeated," Cid stated and started busying himself with his task at hand. "Now, are we going to actually get any work done?"

Martine's composure changed back to his normal reserved attitude. He wanted to say more, in fact he had many concerned arguments, but instead, he nodded his head and sat down next to Cid, helping the man go over the new files and tasks. He was concerned for Garden; he was concerned for his SeeDs. He had only hoped that Cid was correct and Rinoa was no longer a threat.

* * *

><p>Rinoa had left the elevator and walked down the stairs when she spotted Zell creeping along towards the library.<p>

"Zell!" She called out to him, only to find him ducking behind one of the benches.

Laughing to herself she skipped down the stairs and ran over to bench finding him huddled with his head in between his knees.

"Zell, what are you doing?" She chuckled at his peculiar behaviour.

The blond looked up to find his caller and let out a sigh of relief.

"Oh, I thought you were Selphie," he answered as if that explained his bizarre manner.

"Okay…" Rinoa replied waiting for him to continue.

"She's already recruiting for the Garden Festival Committee," he elaborated as he stepped out of his poor attempt of a hiding place.

The two continued to walk along the lobby in the direction of the library, both for different reasons. It was at this time Rinoa decided to share her happy news, knowing that her SeeD friend would be ecstatic for her.

"Well after speaking to Cid, I can officially tell you that I've been given residency." She cheerfully related showing Zell the residency form in her hand.

"Booya!" Zell replied, pulling her into a squeeze. "It'd be a bummer if you had to leave; we've all been through so much."

"I know," Rinoa agreed. "Besides, I've made some really good friends here; I'd hate to leave you all."

"Hmm, you sure have made one really good friend," Zell winked.

Rinoa eyed him ignorantly at first, before realising the double meaning. She let out a small giggle, before gently nudging him in the ribs for his comment. Of course she had, Squall had been more than fully aware of the stares as they left the ballroom and headed towards the privacy of the dorms. But ignorance was bliss and they were more than happy to pretend not to have noticed.

"Whatever," the Sorceress replied back unaffected by the comment.

"See, you sound just like him, maybe all that kissing last night is turning you into him," he continued to tease.

Arriving just outside the library, Rinoa stood in one spot, placing her hands on her hips in mock astonishment. She eyed Zell with over exaggerated displeasure before defending herself.

"Excuse me, but we kissed once," she lied, hoping Zell would fall for the bait.

"That we know of. We all saw you heading into his room," Zell eyed her carefully in a teasing manner. "And judging by the fact that you weren't booked into one of the guest rooms, I'd say you spent the whole night."

"Zell!" Rinoa cried in embarrassment.

Well, at least she knew that they all had noticed where she and Squall had headed last night. As much as both teens had wishfully believed that all eyes weren't on them, as they tried to unsuccessfully sneak out of the hall and find a quiet place where they could… talk.

The blond laughed, before jogging lightly into the Library, very pleased to see his antics had Rinoa turn a deep shade of red.

* * *

><p>For once the SeeDs' day went by very quickly. A normal day would drag on for them due to the regular classes that revised and improved skills, to the occasional missions carried out during the week. In fact, not one of the five SeeDs had a day pass by them so quickly… well other than the Time Compression days they had to experience.<p>

It had already approached evening time as the six teens gathered in the cafeteria and discussed Squall and Quistis's promotions. The other four were all very positive and optimistic expressing that it was a very great career opportunity and shouldn't be taken lightly.

For Squall it was something he needed to hear, he had his own doubts about taking up the title. He had the same doubts during his promotion to Commander and although that had turned to his favour, he just needed the support and encouragement from his friends to make him realise he was capable of such a position. They had given him that support when he was made Commander and though at the time he felt slightly embarrassed, and a bit annoyed by Rinoa's persistent appeal for him to open up, not to mention Irvine's poor attempts to get him and Rinoa together, he had in fact valued their love and belief in him that ultimately led him to believe in himself.

Though four of the teens were pleased for their SeeD friends, there was still the matter of Cid's departure from Garden. They were happy and encouraging for Squall to take over, but Cid had been there for a long time and a continued support to them all during their mission.

"The least we can do is throw him a retirement party," Selphie piped in.

Any reason for the small brunette to organise a party. She had already asked each member of SeeD to join the Garden Festival Committee and once again they had given her a million reasons to why they couldn't. Squall would be very busy with running Garden, Quistis would be very busy commanding it, and Zell would be very busy since he was thinking of applying for a part time position in the Garden Cafeteria, his ulterior motive to find out exactly where the hotdogs disappear.

The only other two who were more than happy to join were of course Irvine and Rinoa, both of whom didn't have a clue what the Committee was about and only went along with their experiences in Fisherman's Horizon.

"I think that's a splendid idea," Quistis agreed sipping her water. "He deserves a good send off for the work he put in."

"He's been so good to all of us, even me. I'd really like to help," Rinoa offered her services eagerly.

"We should gather all the SeeDs and organise a really nice present too, something for Cid to remember us by," Zell added.

"That and we could dedicate something to him. Like replace the bench outside the Library and maybe put a plaque on it with his name on it and how long he's been the Garden Headmaster," Squall joined in.

"That's a really good idea," Selphie replied encouragingly.

Squall let the thinnest of smiles run across his face as he nodded to the brunette. It was the least he could do seeing as he'd be replacing Cid's position. Normally, Squall wouldn't like to get involved in extra curricular activities, but this was something he knew deserved his attention. Cid had done a lot for them and in his last days as the Headmaster, he was doing a lot more to make Squall's life plans with Rinoa continue.

The group continued to discuss the matter and take notes before assigning duties to each person. By nine o'clock it was time for them to leave the cafeteria and find elsewhere to continue their discussion.

"I think I'll head to bed, I'm going to get up early and see Ma tomorrow," Zell informed before waving at his friends and heading down to his dorm.

Irvine and Selphie headed into the Quad to continue their plans for both Cid's retirement party and the Garden Festival Committee. Quistis had made her way to her office citing that she needed to pick up some files that she had left and needed to complete while Squall and Rinoa slowly headed into the dormitory hand in hand.

Considering that she had gotten up quite late, the Sorceress was still tired and let out a modest yawn while walking next to Squall. She looked over to her Knight to find him with his head down looking very concentrated.

"What's wrong, Squall?" She asked titling her head to look into his eyes.

The SeeD looked up to her with a shake of his head.

"Nothing… just thinking about Cid's offer," he finally replied. "Wonder if he's doing the right thing."

"You mean, you're wondering if offering you the position was the right thing," she corrected knowing his real worries.

She smiled at Squall as they reached the end of the hallway separating the different quarters of residence. Squall was always doubtful and undermined his qualities; if anything had to prove how qualified he was for this position it was the defeat he had won the night before.

Rinoa held his hands in hers tenderly while looking into his eyes with confidence.

"Squall, you made an excellent SeeD, an excellent Commander, what makes you think you won't make an excellent Headmaster?" She smiled at him.

He sighed against her, she had a point. This should have been easy for him, but his apprehensive behaviour always kicked in. It was overwhelming for him the day he was made Commander and at the time he had thought it really was just an attempt to rid Cid of his responsibilities. All of Squall's decisions made during that time to him seemed half-hearted and guesses at best. He didn't want to make half-hearted decisions in this position.

"I guess it's just such a big position, I'm a bit overwhelmed to even be considered for it. I would have thought Quistis would've been the best choice," he answered her honestly.

"She would, but obviously Cid knows that you are just as capable… and you know what? I do too," she replied and placed a small kiss on his lips.

"Thanks," Squall replied appreciative for her continued encouragement.

"I'm going to head to bed now, my room is that way," she nodded behind her.

They both broke hands, albeit a bit begrudgingly, before walking in opposite directions to their dorms.

Once Squall walked into his room, he went through his normal ritual of changing into his sleeping clothes and brushing his teeth, before finally lying in bed with a sigh of exhaustion. It wasn't for any work done that day, but more for the tiredness he'd be facing for the entire week. Another part of it was down to his promotion, Rinoa was right; he was more than capable. He just had to trust in his friends' advice and realise that it was a choice that would undoubtedly excel his career.

* * *

><p>It was well past two in the morning when the Commander was silently asleep in his bed. He stirred slightly at first, before his movements were a bit more vigorous. Images filled his mind, quick shots of his experiences before hearing the all familiar sound of a dark lion like figure roar. The figure loomed over him watching him intently as he looked up to it with conviction. He wouldn't go down easily, he had fought him before and he would fight him again. He had won then and he would be victorious again.<p>

But as Squall raised his gunblade towards the black lion, he noticed that the black leather gloves that he normally donned in, were replaced with something unfamiliar. Black spiky fur clutched at Lionhart's handle gripping it with such intensity that Squall could feel the cold plastic even at his fingertips. He looked further up his arm to notice that the fur was slowly spreading and eating away at the black leather. He wanted to continue watching but his eyes were pulled away by some force to see the black lion grinning at him menacingly.

He had seen that Lion before and he had defeated it… hadn't he?


	3. Decisions

**Author Notes:** Quick thanks to **Jebus Creiss** for beta reading this chapter. I know my pace is slow, but please bear with me for a little while until the ball gets rolling. I promise, I won't take too long getting to the major plot lines.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 3 – Decisions<strong>

Squall jolted awake, rising straight into a sitting position on his bed. He looked around his dark room; strips of white light seeping through the blinds reflected on his wall, everything else seemed to be hidden by shadows.

His breathing was rapid at first, gradually regaining its normal rate the more his mind registered his surroundings. His chest and forehead along with the back of his neck was covered in a cold sweat, causing him to tremble. His hair had more or less matted down to his forehead, soggy and damp. The Commander pushed back the locks of hair matted onto his forehead and felt his head for a rise in temperature.

Unable to accurately identify if he had a high temperature, he eased off the bed and stepped over to his desk pulling out the bottom draw and taking out his First Aid kit. Inside he took out a thermometer and put it into his mouth. A couple of seconds passed and the small beeper sounded indicating his correct temperature. He looked down to the small digital screen to see that his body heat was fine.

Chucking the First Aid kit back into his draw, Squall got back into bed and pulled the covers over him and laid down. He closed his eyes tightly and took a couple of deep calm breaths before opening his eyes again.

He had had the same dream for the past three nights yet this time it had actually awakened him from sleep. He wasn't sure what the dream meant or why he was even experiencing it. The first night he had defeated Ultimecia he had had a dreamless sleep, yet the second night alone in his dorm room and he started having nightmares. The Commander begged that it wouldn't be something reoccurring. Fair enough it was his week off from work, but another couple of days and he would need his solid eight hour sleep.

Trying to remember back to his dream, Squall replayed the images in his head. He knew who the black lion was; he had many symbolic memorabilia in his possession to remind him. One of which was staring at him from a corner of his room. He stared over at his gunblade storage box, looking closely at the silver metal outlining of Griever's head. The actual lion was a lot more menacing and a greater more virtual in his dreams; the black fur, the red horns atop his head, the sharp off-white fangs and most vividly, the fierce yellow eyes that seemed to stare straight into his soul.

He remembered how he felt when Ultimecia first called on him; he had never seen Griever in such a form before that – he almost wasn't sure whether he wanted to fight against such a mighty Guardian Force. But he had fought against all the others and won, which soon resulted in the same defeat with Griever. Except there was something different about Griever, something that Squall couldn't explain. Maybe it was because the Commander put a lot of significance to the black lion and spent most of his life relating its superiority.

Squall shook his head and turned to his side in a foetal position, ready to attempt to fall back into a peaceful sleep. Whatever these dreams were about, he sure wasn't going to find the answers by staring at his gunblade box.

* * *

><p>Lunchtime had approached, and Selphie found herself dragging all her friends to the cafeteria for a review meeting on their current task. If they were going ahead with throwing Cid a retirement party she wanted everything to be perfect. She had already called up the Balamb party shop and ordered three hundred black and silver balloons. Deciding that Garden had enough crepe and sugar paper she and her friends could spend the rest of their week off making other decorations to adorn the hall.<p>

"Well I've spoken to the Cafeteria Lady and she said she'll order some extra hotdogs this week for the party," Zell informed the brunette.

"Any other food apart from hotdogs?" Selphie asked worriedly, now that she thought about it, maybe Zell wasn't the best of people to put in charge of food. Knowing him he'd probably have a theme of hotdogs starting with mini hotdogs through to roast hotdogs and even down to hotdog flavoured ice-cream.

"Yeah, some mini burgers, crab cakes and other finger foods she can get her hands on," Zell replied, receiving a relieved grin from his friend.

"Great! What about you Quistis?"

The blonde looked at her friend and passed over the pictures of different sized plaques she had chosen. If her friends could all decide on which one to use, she'd have Cid's details engraved before passing it to one of the maintenance workers to assemble on the bench outside the Library.

"I don't see a difference," Zell stated, pointing to the pictures.

"Look at the caption, Zell," Quistis replied with slight impatience. "The second one is evidently smaller than the other two."

"Oh yeah," he replied nodding his head.

Rinoa picked up the third picture, looking at it closely and noticing small imprints to each corner.

"Hey Quistis, what are these imprints?" she asked unable to make them out.

"Oh yeah, the printer didn't really pick them up, but they're actually patterns on each corner. In fact I like that one the best," Quistis replied while turning the paper over. "But it's also the most expensive."

Rinoa nodded her head in understanding, of course it would be. While the other two were plain gold blocks, this one was a much lighter shinier gold with thin carvings at each corner; it was much more elegant looking on that alone.

"What do you think, Squall?" Rinoa asked nudging Squall's arm.

The Commander looked at her, slightly jerking his arm back from the contact. He hadn't noticed Rinoa speaking to him let alone what she was holding out in front of him.

"Are you okay?" she asked concerned.

"I'm fine," Squall replied instantly.

She looked at him closely wondering why he had zoned out. It wasn't like Squall to do so unless he was intentionally ignoring his friends. But even so, it was uncharacteristic of him to be startled by her touch. She wondered what was consuming his thoughts.

"Well, Quistis and I like this plaque, what you think?" she asked trying to get him to join in the conversation.

Squall took the picture off Rinoa and looked at it closely. Looking at the other two pictures lying on the table, he agreed that the one he was holding was a lot nicer.

"Yeah, I'd go with this one," he agreed and handed back the picture.

"All right, well this one it is," Quistis confirmed and scribbled down a reminder at the back of the picture.

"Okay, we need to sort out the guest list; I've already added in some VIPs that I would love to come!" Selphie squealed.

With his friends all getting into the planning, Squall realised that Cid's departure was soon approaching. He hadn't given the Headmaster his decision on the Headmaster position, though that was at the fault of something else preoccupying his mind. Every time he sat down to think about the pros and cons of his offer, Rinoa's words popped into his head and immediately settled his heart. He trusted in her judgement, he trusted his friends' belief in him and decided it was time to believe in himself as devoutly as they did.

"I need to speak to Cid, so I'm going to head off," Squall informed the group.

"You want me to come with you?" Rinoa asked, a bit concerned by his earlier trance like state.

"No," Squall shook his head and gave her the tiniest of smiles.

He lightly placed a hand on her back before stepping away and walking out of the cafeteria.

* * *

><p>It didn't take him long before he reached Cid's office and knocked on the door lightly. He waited only a couple of seconds before he heard Cid call for him to enter.<p>

Opening the door, Squall found Cid busy at work with Martine close by him as usual. The two men smiled as the Commander walked in and stood with a salute.

"Squall, you're off duty, no need for SeeD etiquette," Cid laughingly replied, amused by the SeeD's devout submission to the mercenary way. "What can we do for you anyway?"

Squall took a deep breath before relating his decision. It was a big part of his career, a big step in hopefully a right direction. He just had to trust in his friend's belief and go with it.

"I wanted to give you my decision about the Headmaster position," Squall answered.

The two men waited for his answer, it had been a couple of days since Cid had offered the position to Squall. Both men thought there was a good chance that he would decline the offer seeing as he didn't accept his current title with much gratitude. Again that was really to Cid shoving it down his throat.

"After much deliberation, I've decided I'd like to take the position and thank you for the opportunity," Squall's formal reply came back.

"Well, I'm glad to hear that," Cid replied with much delight. "I think you'll be a wonderful Headmaster."

"Congratulations, Squall," Martine responded with equal delight shaking the SeeD's hand.

"You made a good decision, Squall. We all believe you are perfect for this position, I wouldn't have offered it to you if I didn't," Cid remarked with honesty. "But I am surprised, I actually thought you came in here to decline the offer."

Martine nodded along with Cid; he had thought the same thing.

"Well, I did talk to my friends about it and they said it was a good opportunity and that I was capable of the position," Squall answered, receiving a look comprehension from the two old men. "Besides, Rinoa kind of said something that made sense," he added.

"Haha, that girl is a keeper," Cid laughed; had he known Rinoa had that much authority over Squall he would have gone to her directly.

Martine however wasn't so swayed with this added bit of information. It seemed that the Knight's decision was based wholly on his Sorceress's agreement. It begged the question that Martine was considering: would Squall have declined the offer if she hadn't agreed? For sure this method of decision making wasn't something that would benefit Garden. Squall couldn't go running to his Sorceress every time he needed to make a decision about Garden's welfare. Those judgments he alone should be able to make, if not ask for the advice of his cabinet.

"Er, there was something else I wanted to talk about," Squall said a bit more bashfully, though he did his best attempt to hide it. "It's sort of personal."

"Oh, I can leave you two alone," Martine announced, getting up from his chair.

"You don't need to leave the room, Sir," Squall quickly stated, feeling slightly uneasy.

"No no, it's fine. I should probably pick up some dinner for myself and Cid," Martine excused himself. "But congratulations, Squall. I look forward to working with you," he said earnestly.

Once Martine was outside, Squall took yet another breath, exhaling slowly and rubbing his forehead. He looked at Cid apprehensively and voiced his other decision.

"Rinoa and I… we're a couple," he said awkwardly.

"That's nice, I'm happy for you," Cid couldn't help but smile at the bashful SeeD.

"Thank you," Squall replied on impulse. "I… I want to marry her," he blurted out having no other way to articulate his confession.

Cid gazed at Squall for a couple of seconds, doubting whether he had heard correctly. Had the Commander of SeeD, Squall Leonhart the introvert and unfriendly outcast, just confessed that he wanted to start an intimate relationship with someone? Cid couldn't help but be amused by it and a lot more gleeful when Squall's facial expression didn't change. Squall was serious.

"You want to marry Rinoa?" he asked again for confirmation.

"Yes, Sir," Squall answered with easy conviction.

"Well, I'm happy for you," Cid said still amazed at what he was hearing. "I'm sorry Squall for my lack of emotion, I just… well I never thought I'd hear something like that from you- well not because you can't get married, you can I just meant that-"

Squall held out his hand in front of the Headmaster, deciding to be merciful to him. He expected as much from his comrades and work colleagues, given that yes he wasn't the most romantically involved or socially integrated individual. But this was a new chapter of his life, Rinoa was part of it and he wanted to do everything in his capability to make it perfect.

"It's alright Sir, she was a bit shocked when I asked her," Squall replied.

"Ah," Cid laughed. "Wait, if you asked her already why are you here now?"

"She said no," Squall answered.

Cid stared back at him with a look of confusion. This was getting more confusing the more he questioned. If Squall had asked Rinoa to marry him and she had declined, why on earth was he telling Cid now? Seeing the look on the Headmaster's face, Squall groaned internally, realising what the situation must seem like.

"She said no because she wasn't sure about the timing. But she did say if I asked her again than she would definitely say yes," Squall clarified.

"Ah, alright I understand now," Cid replied and chuckled to himself. "When do you plan on asking her… again?"

Squall took another breather, he hadn't had time to think of a plan, bits and pieces had filled his mind on ways to try and ask her again and the timing perfect for both of them. Surely he'd have to wait again before asking her, any time too soon and she may reject him again.

"When the time is right, I'm sure I'll figure out when," Squall replied but more to himself.

"Well, all the best Squall, I am truly happy for both your decisions," Cid remarked, shaking the SeeD's hand.

* * *

><p>Rinoa ripped off the price tag to the brand new pair of jeans she had bought that day, and folded them before placing them into her chest of draws. Being on a mission to save the world hadn't left her with many clean clothes and her normal everyday clothes were very worn out. She had gone out that afternoon with Selphie and Quistis to the Balamb clothes stores to pick up a few articles of clothing. Sure it wasn't the expensive stuff she was used to in Deling, but Balamb did have some fashionable things.<p>

Taking out the rest of her t-shirts from her shopping bag, she tore off the tags and folded them and placed them into one of the top drawers.

The young Sorceress looked around her new room with a wave of comfort; she hadn't felt this way when she walked into the cold, dull and empty room. But now that she had purchased a few ornaments, clothes, and disposed of the SeeD emblem bedspread for her newly purchased pink satin one, she felt more at home.

"A couple of pictures and posters and it'll be perfect," she muttered to herself.

It was at first overwhelming for her, a new place of residence once again and this time in a much stricter atmosphere. It was almost like living with Caraway again, only the added bonus of her friends being with her made it bearable. That and Squall was there.

When she had been with the Forest Owls she always thought that once they established freedom in Timber she would remain with either Zone or Watts, maybe rent in a shared accommodation, get a job in Timber and live her days out there. It wasn't much to think about, she would take every day as it came. But things didn't work out like she had thought, during her fight for freedom she had met someone and that turned her plans completely upside down.

Rinoa never imagined she'd willingly live in a place with strict rules and schedules, working for an organisation that she really and honestly didn't agree with their outlook on life, though she had sought their help nonetheless. But here she was, accepting the tenancy agreement, living without her beloved dog and working for a hundred gil an hour.

There was one sole reason to her agreeing to such a life, and that reason was probably sleeping in one of the rooms down in the next hallway.

* * *

><p>The Commander was once again trying his best to sleep. But once again his body jerked in bed. His face contorted to a look of pain, his forehead creased in confusion and horror. What Squall was seeing in his dream was a lot more vivid and felt a lot more real.<p>

His arms were burning, the skin tearing from elbow-down, seeping out the black fur eating away at his human form. The thick shiny fur protruded out of his skin, the back of his hands had grown with fur and his fingers were painfully extending into claw like paws. He dropped Lionheart from his pawlike hands and looked down to it with desperation. He could not move his arms any longer; he couldn't reach down to the floor and pick up his only hope.

Once again his eyes looked at the black Lion in from of him, laughing and eyeing him menacingly. Squall could see every part of the lion's body shaking with power and authority, all except his arms. The Lion's arms seemed to be disappearing, fading into nothingness.

The pain at his arms increased as his skin resulted in more tears and his muscles enlarged. He couldn't tell what was happening to him, why his body was mutating. He tried shutting his eyes, hoping that whatever he was seeing wouldn't take place so long as he acted ignorant to it.

Finally, he managed to close his eyes and instantly the pain ceased. Again he felt a cold trickle down his neck and opened his eyes to his dark silent room.

Nightmares. The fourth that week and getting more intense by the night.

Squall pushed the covers off his bed and stood up groggily. Though the pain at his arms were gone, he couldn't help but feel them aching. Maybe it was psychological, or maybe it was real. He seemed to thrash about in his bed from the sheer vividness of his dream. It had seemed so real.

The Commander's mouth was dry and severely in need of some water. He opened his bedroom door and walked over to the small mini fridge on the other side of his lounge area. Taking a water bottle out, he twisted the cap off before taking three large gulps, emptying half the bottle. He took short breath before greedily drinking the remainder of the water.

Sleep was obviously not in his favour, it had been the fifth night back and it was his fourth dream. He had expected the dreams to stop but they obviously had more to show him. He couldn't help but get a bit annoyed; were his friends experiencing the same thing? It was natural that many SeeDs experience restlessness and vivid dreams after a mission. But these dreams just seemed so real and excruciatingly painful.

He looked at his bedroom in despair, he didn't want to go back in and face the same nightmares. He probably should have gone to Dr. Kadowaki and informed her of the constant nightmares and maybe she could have prescribed him some sort of sleeping drug.

Squall threw away the now empty water bottle into the trash can and walked back to his room. He pulled on one of his zip up fleeces and put on his shoes and socks. It looked a bit odd, grey SeeD night shirt and pants with black boots. But Squall wasn't bothered with fashion trends.

Stepping out of his door, he placed his keycard in his pocket and walked the silent halls. It must have been way past four in the morning, not one sound could be heard other than the Commander's steps on the cold marble floor.

He walked with quick pace, not wanting to be seen by one of the Garden Faculty members; now that the Disciplinary Committee had come to an end, the Garden Faculty members took it upon themselves to execute the severest punishments for rule breakers.

Finally arriving to his destination, Squall knocked lightly on the door. A moment passed without any response so he knocked slightly louder. Again no response so Squall knocked a bit louder adding two extra knocks. It was the best he could do without causing any attention to him, he knew one of the Garden Faculty would be making their rounds any moment and would catch him red handed.

Finally, he heard some scuffling about and the door lock click before finally opening up to him.

"Squall?" Rinoa's sleepy-eyed faced looked at him.

"Hey," he merely stated as he walked in and shut the door quietly behind him.

She looked at him puzzled and half in sleep, the Commander assumed that she wasn't aware if she was dreaming or not. Deciding to put her mind at ease, he spoke his sudden arrival.

"I couldn't sleep," he informed her and stood waiting by her door.

She nodded her head, understanding full well, and took his hand in hers. She walked back to her bed and spread across some of her pillows on her bed. Getting in first, she lay right next to the wall on her single bed and waited for her Knight to take off his fleece and shoes before finally getting in and lying sideways. It was a bit awkward to sleep next to each other without Rinoa being flattened against the wall or Squall nearly falling off. But after many attempts both realised their actions were futile and so Rinoa allowed Squall to get comfortable before resting the upper part of her body on his chest.

"Rinoa," Squall whispered to her after a while not sure if she was asleep.

"Hm?" she responded, still tired and desiring to go back to her slumber. She, unlike the other SeeDs, had work in a couple of hours and needed all the leftover hours she could get.

"Do you have nightmares?" he asked quietly.

Rinoa scratched her head and cuddled closer to Squall before answering. "Yeah, everyone does."

"No, I mean, since we've come back from Time Compression have you had any nightmares?" he clarified, rubbing her back and feeling the soft cotton of her vest underneath his rough palm.

The Sorceress fidgeted on top of him, clearly still desiring nothing more than sleep. During their missions Squall hardly talked, ever, and she now greatly appreciated that trait of his that he seemed to be lacking at the moment.

"No… not nightmares," she answered in between a yawn.

"Not nightmares?" Squall repeated after her, wanting for her to continue.

He was slightly relieved, not because he was happy to hear someone he cared about going through the same if not similar ordeal he was going through, but that he wasn't alone in experiencing something post-Ultimecia.

"I just have dreams of us all back on the mission again… things like… stuff we did together," she answered again, half in drowsiness and half in attempts to stay up.

"What kind of stuff?" Squall asked further, prodding into her dreams hoping he could find some sort of similarities. Maybe he was having the same experiences, only more detailed and vivid. The Commander did always dreams of his childhood experiences and they always felt as if he was somehow going back in time to relive each moment.

"Like when we went to Shumi Village and found those stones, and then the time when that monkey threw insults at you near Obel Lake," Rinoa answered back, disinterested in the topic of conversation.

"Any other things? Like images and manipulated flashbacks?" Squall further inquired.

"Erm, last night I had a dream about you in a Pupu outfit," she giggled against him from the memory.

Squall rolled his eyes; it was just like Rinoa to have weird dreams about the Commander in unnatural and completely pointless outfits. If she wasn't sleep driven, she may have elaborated to reveal that he was doing some sort of dance to the Jig music played during the concert at Fisherman's Horizon.

He thought about her dreams compared to his; they were a sharp contrast, hardly anything similar. While Rinoa's seemed to be stemmed from ramblings of her mind on their experiences, Squall's dreams leaned more on the side of aggressive outcomes of something he literally could not explain. Yes he had fought Griever; he had been victorious and won. But why was he dreaming about turning into a blackened monster?

"Rinoa?" Squall whispered again to get his girlfriend's attention.

She didn't reply; he could only hear her even breathing, followed by the realisation that she had gotten slightly heavier. Likely, she had fallen asleep within the seconds that he thought about their dreams.

He kissed the space of her forehead that was closest to him and wrapped his arms around her tighter. Whatever these dreams were about, he would need to speak to Dr. Kadowaki or Cid soon. He couldn't allow them to persist once he took on his new career position.


	4. Revelations

**Chapter 4 – Revelations**

The day had finally arrived; after a gruelling four day planning marathon, Selphie and her friends had managed to organise and execute a spectacular party. The entire ballroom was elegantly decorated with round tables dotted around the outskirts leaving the middle of the hall empty for dancers. Crisp white tablecloths, sprinkled with confetti and, by Quistis's instruction, crystal drinking glasses and the cafeteria's best chinaware adorned each table for a fine-dining experience. Even the chairs that were normally bland four-legged wooden ensemble, were veiled in white linen to hide the many overused scuff marks on the backrest.

Selphie had wanted to go crazy and adorn the entire hall with streamers, balloons , multi-coloured paperchains and banners, but her more sensible and less eccentric friends had advised against it, choosing white and gold matt balloons, and one golden banner at the entrace of the hall reading _'All the best, Cid!'_.

It wasn't very extravagant, but that was made all the better with the party list. Other than the SeeDs and Cadets of Balamb Garden, Selphie had snuck into Cid's office and retrieved his phone book, calling many high-profile guests to the party. Of course, her main goal really was to invite one brave and very dashing man to the function. She had been more than ecstatic when he had personally replied to the message she had left with his personal assistant, saying he'd be delighted to attend and was grateful for the invite.

And true to his word, Laguna Loire entered the grand Balamb hall, smiling cheerfully at the hundreds of students mingling and enjoying the atmosphere. Kiros and Ward had accompanied Laguna; they had been invited too, but they had ulterior motives for their part. Laguna wasn't the very best of eloquent speakers and the two men found it an obligation to make sure they successfully relayed the President's blubbering, preventing him from offending anyone anymore than he already did.

Walking further into the large, decorated ballroom, they were finally noticed by Selphie, who did what was expected of her and ran to her Knight.

"Sir Laguna, so happy you could come!" she enthusiastically cried, jumping in joy.

"I'm happy to be here." Laguna grinned back, revelling at the atmosphere.

"The others are all here, won't you join us?" she asked, gesturing towards a table where her friends sat.

Walking over to the group of teen SeeDs, Laguna spotted every one of the world's saviours. His eyes at first was drawn to a smile he was almost certain he had seen before. Beautiful were Rinoa's sparkling eyes, her pearl-white toothy grin, complete with the hint of a very cute dimple. But it was her eyes, warm, welcoming and seeming to always be filled with laughter. Her strapless velvet dark blue dress and matching dark blue gloves, added a radiance to her dark ebony hair and emphasised the sparkling silver diamond jewellery. Her hair that normally hung loose, was curled in gentle locks with the front pinned back into a small bun.

Sitting next to her on her left was Quistis, dressed in a medium length red halter neck dress and a black netted bolero. Light gold jewellery adorned her neck and arms, highlighting the golden colour of her sleek and straight blonde hair.

Zell sat on the Quistis's left, seemingly busy with the mini-hotdogs piled onto his plate. His attire was very different from what Laguna could remember. Instead of his boyish casual clothes, Zell was donned in his black SeeD uniform, like many of the other male members attending the party. Irvine being the only one who was dressed in a crisp black shirt with a tan colour over coat and light brown pants. His black cowboy hat complimenting his entire look.

And there, leaning against the wall right behind his dazzling beauty, was Squall Leonhart, complete with his blank expression and lowered gaze. His leg was propped up against the wall, his arms folded over his SeeD uniform. He hadn't noticed Laguna approach, something the man was thankful for. Had Squall made eye contact with Laguna, his already palpitating heart would have skyrocketed.

"President Laguna," Quistis stated, getting up from her seat and standing up to greet the man and his entourage. The rest of her peers followed in pursuit, standing and greeting the President with a salute, all except Rinoa who stood and gave a cute wave.

"Nice to see you all! I haven't seen you guys since you took down Ultimecia," Laguna cheerfully cried. "You all remember Kiros and Ward." He gestured to the two men behind him wearing black tuxedos along with Laguna. The three men did look slightly overdressed compared to the more militant attire the rest of the men were wearing. Thankfully, other non-Garden guests soon arrived, balancing out the formal attire.

"Nice to see you all again," Quistis replied smiling. "Won't you join us?"

The three men sat down opposite Quistis and Rinoa, eyeing Zell carefully as he smiled through his straining hot-dogged mouth. It was an understatement to say the least, that the sight alone put them off the hotdogs for the entire night, in fact, the entire decade.

Squall, who had nodded at the three men, briskly walked over and sat down next to Rinoa. Already Laguna could feel his pulse rise at the close proximity of the young man. He couldn't keep his eyes off Squall. Bizarrely, the scar that ran across Squall's face just made his steel-blue eyes radiate even more. The tiny grey specks were that much more highlighted against the deep crimson line running down the bridge of his nose. Strangely, his scar made his face all the more perfect in every way.

Again, for the second time that night, Laguna couldn't help but feel he had seen those same eyes elsewhere.

"You're staring," Kiros lightly whispered in an almost melodic tone.

"He has her eyes!" Laguna whispered back, however his tone was a lot louder than he realised as the other members of the table looked at him in wonderment. Ward could only roll his eyes, placing his hand on his forehead and sighing at what would be the first of Laguna's blunders.

"Sorry, we were just saying how nice Squall's eyes were." Laguna chuckled, causing Kiros to mimic Ward's actions.

The groups of teens just looked bizarrely at the President, replaying what they'd heard in their heads. Did they really just hear the President of Esthar compliment their Commander's eyes? Squall could only look at the man in front of him and think back to his first impression of Laguna. True it was that he was a blubbering moron.

"Thank you," Squall shortly broke the silence, moving his chair closer to Rinoa.

"So, where is Cid?" Kiros asked, hoping to change the conversation and forget the slight misunderstanding.

"He's just on his way, had to go pick up Edea last night," Selphie answered, still dreamily looking into Laguna's eyes.

"We're hoping to maybe steal him away for a bit. We've brought Professor Odine with us tonight," Laguna announced looking around the table and stopping once he reached Squall. "I think he has something which will interest the Headmaster."

"What is it?" Zell asked eagerly.

"Zell," Quistis quickly piped in. She was sure if the President wished to tell them, he would have done so.

"It's all right. I'm sure your Headmaster will inform you all, after we've spoken to him." Laguna smiled at the two SeeDs. "Oh, speaking of which, who is the new Headmaster?"

The SeeDs and the young Sorceress remained silent, making slight glances at Squall, not sure whether or not he wanted to reveal his new promotion. But sighing to himself, Squall knew it was only a matter of time before the world would be enlightened of his new career position. Besides, there was no other title that Squall could possibly adopt that would outdo the one he currently donned. Such was the life of Squall Leonhart, it never was an easy thing to have things handed to him so freely. Sorry, not handed, but more like shoved down his throat. But he digressed.

"I'll be taking over as Balamb's Headmaster," Squall replied.

"Congratulations," Laguna cried in pleasure, shaking the Commander's hand vigorously.

"So where's Ellone?" Zell asked through another mouthful of vigorously massacred meat by-products.

"She said to apologise for not being able to attend. It's my fault really, I got the invitation the day after she left for Centra and she didn't have the time to get back," Laguna explained.

"Ellone's in Centra?" Selphie asked with interest.

"Yes, she went to visit some of her White SeeD friends."

"Here comes Cid," Rinoa announced, rising from her chair to make way towards the senior couple.

Upon entering the grand hall, Cid an Edea were greeted with an applause and several handshakes. They smiled at their young _SeeD_lings, wished them well and conversed with a couple of high-profile guests from around the globe. Laguna took it upon himself to make his way over to the Headmaster and relay his best wishes, as well as inform him of his breaking news. He had just reached Cid's side, when the man turned around and greeted him with a warm welcome. The two men shook hands and made the usual introductory banter before Professor Odine showed up at their sides, demanding to speak to Cid.

"Well, I guess I could spare a couple of minutes, it just means my speech will have to be shortened down." Cid amusedly obliged the two men and followed them out of the hall to a more private setting.

* * *

><p>The party now in full swing, the group of SeeDs took it upon themselves to hit the dance floor. The first among them were obviously Squall and Rinoa. As soon as the beats for 'Waltz for the Moon' were played by the Garden Orchestra, the young Sorceress took it upon herself to repeat her antics and drag her Knight onto the dance floor, albeit this time with little effort, and minus the poorly seductive coaxing.<p>

Squall placed his hands on Rinoa's hips, smiling to himself as she grinned at him. They took several swayed steps, going along with the music, enjoying themselves and finally dancing without bumping into Nida and his date.

"I quite enjoyed it last time when you were practically stepping all over everyone," Rinoa couldn't help remark midway during the dance routine.

"Only because you like to dominate me." Squall smirked, playing along.

The Sorceress let out a hearty laugh before falling into his arms and allowing him to lead her further onto the dance floor.

Zell was too busy finishing off his current plate of finger food to care about the dancing, much to the dismay of his pigtailed date. Having two left feet, he decided he'd play the Squall card and sit the current dance out. As well as the rest.

Irvine and Selphie had more or less sped onto the dance floor, ready to put their practice to the test. Selphie had quite enjoyed the inauguration ball, but lacking the acquaintance of several people, this was the first dance she could actually enjoy with her friends.

Quistis swiftly moved around the outskirts of the dancing arena, looking and hoping for anyone wanting a partner. Last time, she hadn't bothered to partake in the festivities given that she had been demoted. This day however, marked the start of a new career path and she hoped she could enjoy at least one dance.

She was about to walk back to her table, seeing as every other male member was already engaged or uninterested to dance, when she felt someone hold onto her elbow. Turning around, she found Squall behind her with a cheeky-faced Rinoa standing next to him looking very breathless.

"Dance?" Squall asked, holding his hand out to her.

Smiling, Quistis nodded, mouthing a quick thank-you to her raven haired friend. Rinoa stood watching the two elegantly sway to the beat of another melody. She revelled at the intensity of the atmosphere. Never did she imagine life would become so bright again; having been in darkness for some time, she hated to admit that there were times when she thought that darkness would never pass. She believed in the others, they were so strong, determined and were trained to tackle almost any obstacle. But for herself, having both parents wrap her in bubble-wrap her whole life, she had little self-esteem. She revealed as much during their trip to Trabia.

Taking a good deep breath, Rinoa smiled and gazed around the room. Life was very good.

* * *

><p>After Cid had made his speech, wishing all the best for the future and how he felt no doubt that he was leaving Garden in good hands, the party residence sat down to eat. The cafeteria staff, with the help of an extended budget, had hired external caterers to manage the party.<p>

Rinoa had been sitting in between Squall and Laguna, when the latter had bent down and whispered into her ear.

"You look just like your mother," Laguna softly spoke, his voice covered in fondness.

"You knew my mother?" Rinoa asked in surprise, putting her hand in front of her mouth to prevent any particles of food from splattering out.

"Yes, she used to play the piano at the Deling City hotel, this was back when I was in the Galbadian army," Laguna replied, smiling at the distant memory.

"I don't remember much about my mother; she died when I was five. But, I do remember she was very fond of singing and playing the piano." Rinoa smiled back at the President. "What was she like back then?"

Laguna breathed a sigh of perplexity. "I'm not entirely sure. I really only had one conversation with her and even then I sort of passed out midway. Er, she gave me wine and… well alcohol makes me very sleepy," he answered, pointing to his water glass and hoping that she understood.

"I understand." Rinoa giggled as if on cue.

Hearing her laugh, and seeing the way her eyes creased at the edges, Laguna could only feel a twinge of nostalgia. It seemed as if some young, very young version of Julia sat right next to him. Yet, ironically enough, just looking past her into Squall's eyes, was as if Raine was also dining at the same table. The tides of fate were very ironic, strange, but ironic nonetheless.

It was an odd perception, but being around the children of the two women in his life, put a smile on the President's face. The mothers weren't around, but he felt some ease knowing that the children they left behind were doing more than well. But given their lives didn't need any more complications, he decided to refrain from telling Rinoa about his crush on her mother. He doubted his revelation to Squall would dampen the relationship he had with Raine.

"The one thing I can tell you; your mother had your smile," Laguna said assuredly.

"Thank you." Rinoa beamed at the man, taking his hand and gently squeezing it.

Regardless of how little she knew of the man, she felt that the President of Esthar was someone she could definitely get along with. Just speaking about her mother was refreshing to her. It was making the night all the more better.

Squall had turned towards Rinoa as she held onto the President's hand, raising a keen interested eyebrow in question. Laguna decided to be brave; there really wasn't much time left and pretty soon, he'd have to make his way for Esthar.

"Squall, may I have a word with you?" Laguna asked, poking his head to the side in order to get a better view of the Commander.

Squall nodded in affirmation, placing his napkin down on the table, he rose and followed the President towards the balcony. He more or less guessed that the President wanted to talk to him regarding the same matter he spoke to Cid about. Now that the Commander would be taking over Garden, it was only natural that he should be involved in any issues that would be affecting Garden in the future.

Laguna made his way over to the edge of the balcony, before turning to face the young brunet. He took a breath and looked into the all familiar steel-blue eyes. He could feel his stomach knot and his heartbeat rise. To make matters worse, his throat was also drying up; he wished he had brought his water along with him.

"I…" Laguna paused not knowing where to start from. Squall looked at the man waiting for him to continue. "Do you remember before we arrived at Lunatic Pandora, I said I wanted to tell you something, but that I'd understand if you didn't want to hear it?"

Squall frowned at first, but nodded slowly as he vaguely remembered the scene in his head. Laguna took the gesture to continue and took another shaky breath before continuing.

"Well, you see Squall. I don't know how much of my past you saw. Do you, or were you ever acquainted with a woman named Raine?" he asked, though he already knew the answer; he had confirmed as much with Ellone.

"Yes, I remember a woman named Raine. She looked after Si-Ellone when her parents were taken away," Squall answered.

"Good." Laguna nodded, looking down at his shoes in apprehension. He willed himself to continue as the silence was dragging on. "Well, Squall. Raine had a baby."

Squall looked at the President curiously before opting to speak. "I thought Raine died?" he asked, unsure.

"Oh, yes," Laguna answered, realising how his words came out. "I mean, she had a baby back then. It was about… nearly eighteen years ago."

Squall just looked at the man, wondering where this conversation was going. Laguna remained silent, pausing in speech to mentally encourage himself to continue his declaration. He could do it, he wasn't the same blubbering idiot he was years ago, now he was the President of Esthar, surely that was something to be proud of, right?

"So?" Squall asked, breaking the prolonged silence.

"The baby was mine," Laguna confessed with hurt. "I didn't know she was pregnant at the time… I don't even know if I'd have ventured out to find Ellone if I had known she was carrying my child," Laguna emotionally rambled on, staring solemnly at his shoes.

"I'm sorry," Squall automatically replied. "If you require SeeD to find your lost child, I'm sure we can come to some arrangement, but we'll need a lot of-"

"Squall," Laguna interrupted before the Commander could continue. "It's not necessary. I know where he is. Where my son is."

"Oh," Squall replied, still unsure why this was a topic of conversation and where this was all going.

He was certain that the President would inform him of what he spoke to Cid about. He half expected Professor Odine to come along with them to explain some kind of new Junction system, or para-magic extensions. Instead, he was left with some heartfelt love story, that he was certain half a year ago he would have preferred not to listen to.

"He's o-ouch! Ouch!" Laguna cried out, grabbing onto the stone balcony-railing behind him.

"Are you all right?" Squall asked, taking a step forward in surprise of the man's sudden outburst.

"I'm fine!" Laguna instantly replied, trying to straighten himself but failing. "Just a leg cramp! No big deal."

Squall rolled his eyes; he knew how this would be played out. Finding some mercy in his heart, he took one of Laguna's arms and placed it above his shoulder.

"There's some chairs over here," he stated, helping the President over to the patio chairs near the back wall.

"Thank you." Laguna sighed as he sat down and started massaging his thigh.

Squall scratched his forehead, not sure whether to excuse himself or not. The President wasn't the most eloquent or articulate of speakers and this little conversation would surely drag on a bit.

"Listen, I need to get back," Squall spoke, hoping the man would interpret it as a hint for him to hurrying on up and just get the hell on with it.

"I understand." Laguna nodded disappointedly.

He couldn't hide his hurt. He had hoped he could finally tell Squall that he wasn't an orphan, that his father was still living and hoping to start some kind of relationship. But his bloody nervous habits caved in, and he most probably looked like a retard in front of the one boy he desperately wanted to make proud.

"Where is your son?" Squall asked, slightly agitated that the man couldn't understand the subtleties of his speech.

Laguna took yet another pause, gradually releasing his breath through his nose and mentally willing himself to blurt it out. Just to say it, get it over and done with. Have some mercy on his fleeting nerves and find out what Squall's true reactions were instead of the insecure doubts that flaunted his mind.

"He's standing in front of me," he finally answered.

* * *

><p>Rinoa looked around the grand hall, breathing in every bit of the festive atmosphere. It had sure been a long time that she had the liberty to kick back and just enjoy herself. What a contrast it was for her to be sitting in the same hall, having defeated the Sorceress and freed Timber from its occupation. Her chest heaved in exhilaration and satisfaction, as she let the feeling of a better life get the best of her. Things were truly looking positive. She had not only been allowed to remain in Balamb, but her relationship with Squall had developed at a much faster pace than she would ever have expected.<p>

They hadn't been too intimate. Squall Leonhart wasn't that involving; he still held many attributes that were the pinnacle of his character. But Rinoa loved the frequent late night visits he'd make to her dorm to find comfort in her arms from the nightmares he'd been facing. Of course, Rinoa couldn't feel too much happiness at that, and frowning she remembered she should have broached Squall on that subject. Squall wasn't the type to break Garden rules for his own desires, his nightmares were obviously something which he couldn't handle, and having taken Rinoa's previous advice, he was finally opening up and allowing others to help him.

However, though Rinoa sat in her chair and made a mental note to enquire about Squall's dreams, it was made unnecessary by Martine's announcement.

"We've decided that it would be best for the SeeDs who took part in the Ultimecia mission to go through some therapy sessions. It's normally a requirement for A rank missions, so we really should get it underway," Martine informed the group of SeeDs, plus Rinoa.

"What are we to do in these sessions?" Zell asked inquisitively.

"Well, it'll be half an hour session with a trained Psychologist. She'll just run through some questions pertaining to your health and mental stability," Martine answered briefly before adding more. "The women we've hired for the job will tell you more about it."

"Will I be required to attend?" Rinoa asked, holding her hand up like a student.

"I think it best." Martine nodded, sending her a small smile. "A lot of SeeDs and cadets that go through such serious missions normally are unable to cope with after-affects. This is a way for Garden to keep a check on your mental health; it's also a way for you to alleviate any stress. Everything will be strictly confidential, but if the Psychologist feels there is a serious issue she will inform either Dr. Kadowaki or the Headmaster."

Rinoa turned to Squall to quietly suggest a connection to his dreams, however, one look at the Commander and she could see he was already in a world of his own. Taking her middle finger and thumb, she snapped it in front of Squall's face before giggling at his reaction. Looking at his girlfriend with a mixture of perplexity and surprise, Squall eyed her for an explanation.

"You were miles away," Rinoa answered. "What's on your mind?"

"Nothing." Squall dismissed his thoughts, taking her hand and holding it in his own.

"So, starting from tomorrow, you'll be called one by one for these sessions," Martine concluded before sitting down next to Cid.

"Well, yes, thank you Martine," Cid said, getting up from his seat and picking up his glass. Gently tapping it with his knife, he got the attention of the rest of the people vacating the hall before clearing his throat to speak. "Fellow Cadets and SeeDs of Balamb Garden. I have an announcement to make. Garden, as you all are now enlightened of, was created to defeat the Sorceress, the Sorceress from the future," Cid added, throwing Rinoa an apologetic look. "Now that we have completed our mission, we have to adapt to other goals, our first being to make this world a better living environment."

Turning to face the left wing of the hall, Cid held his head high and pushed up his spectacles. "We carry out many missions for many organisations and individuals across the globe. However, after the Lunar cry and the battle with the Galbadian Army, unfortunately we are low in number. But, that's all to change."

Cid smiled at Laguna before continuing yet again.

"I can now officially confirm, Esthar will be opening their own Garden, training their own SeeDs and working in conjunction with this Garden to make this world a better place."

The sound of applause and cheers filled the hall as the few nearest to the President gave their congratulations. For the five SeeDs and their sorceress friend, it was positive news indeed. Each one of them had contemplated on the making of another Garden, being sure that Esthar would one day join the franchise.

"I will need to have a word with you both later," Cid quickly called out to Squall and Rinoa over the applause, who with interest nodded in agreement.

* * *

><p>The party now ceased, the cleaners already clearing the hall out, the group of SeeDs slowly made their way merrily back to their dorms. Quistis was the first to say her goodnights and head into her room since she planned on being the first one up.<p>

Irvine and Selphie, a bit too tipsy from the high emotions, snuck away into the Secret Area when no one was looking. As for Zell, he more or less waved his goodbyes and jogged into his room, leaving the Commander and his girlfriend to loiter in the halls.

"What do you think Cid wants to talk to us about?" Rinoa could help but wonder.

Holding onto Squall's hand, she walked with him around the entire lobby towards the elevator, looking dreamily at the large water fountain and its crystal-like water.

"Probably about the new Garden in Esthar, maybe he'll want me to train the new SeeDs or something," Squall replied, not too bothered or interested.

The Commander had a more pressing matter in his head, something which completely threw him off the edge. The news was a shock, it was sudden and quite frankly, never expected. But, the Knight wasn't an emotionally rash person; the time would come when he could sit, or lie, and think about it thoroughly. That time was not now.

Walking into the lift, Squall pressed the 3F button and waited for the doors to close around him and Rinoa before it ascended towards Cid's office. Now alone in their quiet cell, Rinoa wrapped her arms around Squall's neck and leant into him. Kissing him lightly on the lips, she smiled at him and noticed his distant expression.

"Are you still bothered by those dreams?" she asked raising her eyebrow. "You should talk to someone about it."

Squall merely sighed and nodded his head. He had just remembered that small factor in his sleeping manner. The dreaded nightmares that kept him up and had him breaking Garden rules to find solace in his girlfriend. How times had changed.

The elevator sounded and the doors swished open, revealing the foyer to the third floor offices. The couple left the lift and walked towards Cid's office. Entering into the room, Squall couldn't help but think that in a matter of hours, this office would _technically_ be his, along with the all the responsibility it held.

"Ah, Squall, Rinoa, please have a seat," Cid motioned to two chairs in front of him.

Walking up to Cid's desk, both noticed the other five people present. Martine, as usual, sat next to Cid, literally shadowing the man behind his desk. In front, Ward, Kiros, Odine and Laguna occupied the left wing chairs leaving the end two chairs for the two teens.

Not making eye contact with the man, Squall gestured to Rinoa to slide in and sit next to Laguna. Taking the last seat, the Commander kept his gaze towards Cid and awaited his reason for calling them.

"Right, well I'll just go and get on with it," Cid bantered on. "Professor Odine came to me tonight with a remarkable discovery. I think it would benefit us all if I let him explain." Cid motioned to the short man to take lead.

Odine got up from his chair and walked to a small stand alone board, flipping a projector on and pointing to a long cylinder machine with the letters JMR on top.

"Az you are well aware, when Rinoa waz under Ultimecia'z pozzesion, I had to run some testz," Odine began his speech, flailing his arms in expression. "After much experimenting and hard work, I finally found an extracting junction ability. I give you Junction Machine Rinoa," he said and smacked the board for emphasis.

"Er, the what?" Rinoa asked raising her hand.

"The Junction Machine Rinoa. This machine allowz ze extraction of Sorceress powerz," Odine cried energetically.

"What Professor Odine means to explain," Kiros interrupted, standing up and addressing Rinoa's cocked eyebrow, "is that there are only two possible ways for a Sorceress to pass on her powers. Either, a dying Sorceress passes it on to another female in order to die peacefully, or in the case of Edea Kramer, one can pass it on willingly to another female," Kiros answered before walking to the projector and hitting a button.

The image changed to the same cylinder machine, only this time with many captions and annotations.

"What this machine does, is it extracts the powers from a Sorceress, ultimately freeing the person from any magical powers used without a GF." Kiros pointed to the top of the cylinder where a small blue bulb was depicted shining brightly and extracting long blue and purple streams of magic from the dummy standing inside the machine.

"Yah! And it takez ze powerz and containz it in this materia at ze top," Odine continued, nodding his head in comprehension.

The bulb like sphere at the top was none other than the 'materia' mentioned. Kiros once again took it upon himself to explain to the two dumbfounded teens, seeing as no one else was attempting.

"See, what this materia is designed to do is contain magic, much like how Draw Points contain para-magic. Only, with materia, it must be junctioned to a person in order to be used," the man concluded.

"Like GFs," Squall commented, inspecting the projected image closely.

"Exactly." Kiros nodded at the Commander.

Rinoa shook her head and sighed. There were some unclear parts that weren't explained and everyone seemed to be leaving out a major question.

"Sorry, but why have you created this machine?" she asked with slight annoyance.

The men in the room looked around at each other, wondering what the point of her question was. What did she mean 'why'? Surely, that was blatantly obvious.

"Well, Odine once created a similar machine that replicates Ellone's ability," Laguna began to answer, placing a gentle hand on Rinoa's forearm. "He created this machine to replicate the ability of extracting Sorceress powers in case… you were thinking-"

"That I didn't want these powers anymore," Rinoa finished off, her face slightly bleak. "I understand. What are the procedures?"

"Ze Sorceress goez into ze machine, we lock ze doors, pump up the power to zis cable here, and the materia draws the power out," Odine explained easily, pointing all over the diagram.

"Any possibilities of this going wrong? I mean, you've never done this before, have you?" Rinoa asked blandly.

"Oh, well no. But I did extract a quantity of Ultima para-magic from Ultima stonez and it did work," Odine replied.

Folding her arms in front of her, Rinoa looked at the diagram of the machine. It never was a passing thought on her mind that there would ever come a day when she'd be told there was a way to get rid of her curse, without having to put another poor soul through it. In fact, this was a blessing. But it didn't feel that way.

"What are the side-effects?" she further asked, somehow almost trying to find fault.

"Maybe some nauzea, dizziness and headachez," Odine considered, not at all bothered by it. "It iz a wonderful machine," he added hoping to win the Sorceress over.

"What will you do with the extracted powers?" Squall asked, speaking for the second time since entering the room.

The Commander had remained more or less silent throughout the exchange, hearing every detail of the machine's capability. But one question was burning in his mind. Sure enough they'd rid Rinoa of her powers, but her powers were the most powerful magic on earth at the given moment. In the wrong hands, the magic-infested materia could do a lot of damage.

"I know what you are asking Commander," Kiros spoke up, smiling at the bright SeeD in front of him, "and we very much mean to treat this Materia exactly how we handled Adel."

"But Adel was freed," Squall countered, not allowing himself to be swayed by the other's excitement. As far as the Commander was concerned, so long as the powers remained with Rinoa, the world wasn't in need of any extracting machine.

"That unfortunate event was only committed due to another Sorceress being able to free her," Kiros argued back. "With Rinoa as the only Sorceress, there wouldn't be any way a human, with or without para-magic, capable of breaking our seal this time."

Squall smiled at the man before replying. "If Rinoa is the only Sorceress, then surely there isn't a need to extract her powers. She isn't a danger to anyone," he concluded, his voice carrying just that bit of emotion as his face soon became irate.

"No one is saying that," Cid interrupted, holding his hands to calm Squall down. "It was merely a suggestion open to Rinoa if she were ever to think about it."

"Why would she? She's not using her powers, for all she cares they'll lie dormant in her," Squall argued back.

"Squall, this isn't just about her powers, it's about Rinoa being able to live her life freely."

"I am living my life freely," Rinoa butted in, a little hurt that she was being spoken of as if she wasn't sitting right in front of them. Did they all forget the most powerful Sorceress alive was present? If she wanted, she could have cast a silence spell on all six of them without the need to junction any GF. She doubted any of them was carrying an Echo Screen, she was tempted to try out her idea.

"Not compared to how you were before," Kiros remarked. "I bet there are many options you had before that you're missing now," he considered.

The Sorceress frowned, not understanding what the man was saying. She shook her head and opened her mouth to speak but couldn't find the words to voice her question.

"Rinoa," Cid called out to the girl, lowering his eyes to look at her properly. "Are you aware of the implications over you while you are a Sorceress?"

She merely replied with the shake of her head. She hadn't bothered to read up about her current state, though there were many books in the library that would have educated her. It was just the thought of living in ignorance that she much preferred over sulking about a life she once had. Maybe it was out of fear, not knowing the monster every one else saw you as. Maybe it was the knowledge that scared her, that staying away from knowing what she was _supposed _to be made it easier not to be.

Sensing her sadness, Squall put a comforting hand over Rinoa's, allowing her just the thinnest of smiles.

"There are many theories, huge amounts of fabrications, but among them are some concrete facts. There is a book in the library which is the most authentic we have at the moment titled _The Sorceress's Knight: Fact vs Fiction_. It should give you some insight into…" Cid faltered in his advice.

"One of the implications I've always been aware of, is the inability to have children," Kiros considered, looking at Cid for confirmation.

"Ah yes, that was certainly the case with Edea," the Headmaster replied with a tone of sympathy. "Not that we could ever be intimate," he added with a flush of embarrassment.

"What was that?" Rinoa asked inquisitively, though she could see the man was clearly shy about the matter.

"There is another theory which is ripe; although no one has officially proven it, there are too many cases that have followed it nonetheless," Cid began explaining. "Edea and I, though we never… had relations," the Headmaster faltered again, "we were quite intimate. A hundred years before Edea, a Sorceress named Dina also shared a very intimate relationship with her Knight, as did many other Sorceresses to rule. Adel was the only anomaly in this theory."

"What theory!" Rinoa barked in agitation. Did it seriously take this long to get the bloody answer out?

Cid paused briefly before replying; he knew it would be something the young Sorceress wouldn't want to hear. Squall's face mimicked that of Rinoa's as his forehead creased into a frown, wondering what knowledge they were being kept away from.

"A Sorceress's life isn't meant to be happy. A Knight's job is to protect her. They aren't meant to fall in love. It's what leads the Sorceress to insanity or in Edea's case, possession," Cid finally answered drearily.

Rinoa turned her head to look at Squall, her face in clear frustration and hurt. Was that truly the case? Would her powers ultimately cause her to go insane and repeat the actions of her predecessors? Would remaining as a Sorceress mean she wouldn't be able to continue developing her relationship with her Knight? Looking into Squall's solemn steel-blue eyes, she knew if she wanted to keep any remnants of their relationship, there really was only one option for them.

* * *

><p><strong>Authors Note: <strong>Just a small break from this fic now since I've decided to complete _Friendship Isn't Enough _before continuing these ones. I have a couple of chapters that are already complete and just need a read over before posting, so hopefully once FIE is finished, I'll be updating this frequently. I know this is rated as M and I did consider to change it to T for the time being seeing as this fic doesn't get the same amount of reception as my other ones, but there is no point to that since the next couple of chapters will require the M rating. Don't worry it's nothing graphic, well not overly. Or maybe I'll change it to T for the time being... hmm.

Would appreciate any feedback for this seeing as I've now revealed the first part of the plot. Let's see if our lovable couple will be able to decifer between fact or fiction. Brownie points to anyone who can spot the fanon and canon elements in the upcoming chapters.

Thank you to all of the readers and reviewers, I know every author will say this, but it truly is motivating to receive such support and acknowledgment. I really whole-heartedly appreciate it!


	5. Hindrance

**Author Note: **I was going to wait for the 5th to update. A long time ago Ashbear advised me to post between Monday-Wednesday because the site normally goes through maintenance during the end of the week. But, I thought I'd risk it this once since I'm only a few days away from having this untouched for three months. Yeah, that's a long time.

I'd also just like to clarify on something. Though this story is postgame and it is in the FF8 category, this isn't a continuation of the game. My stories are centred around Squall and Rinoa and this story in essence is about the hardship they face in a society that is rampant upon unauthentic/fabricated theories relating to sorcery. Basically, it is about _their_ relationship, _NOT the game**.**_

So I should warn you all that there will be certain things in-game (mainly political aspects) that may not even be addressed. It all boils down to whether I think it's relevant to Squall and Rinoa's story. So I'm sorry if I confused anyone into thinking this story will tackle all events after the _game, _it's actually just about _Squinoa_. :)

I realise I also never wrote a disclaimer to this story so: **I don't own any of the characters used in this story nor do I make money from writing them. This should be sufficient for the entire story.**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 5 – Hindrance<strong>

"It doesn't make sense; there is no other Sorceress. How on earth can she become possessed?" Squall argued, his frustration visible as his patience was reaching its tether.

Was everyone in this room brainless or were their arguments actually plausible? There it was, the Commander had already started second-guessing and doubting his own contention. This bad habit tended to make its appearance in very dire situations where his much-needed assertion would be detrimental in keeping his emotions controlled.

He had once been eloquent enough to teach Rinoa a few things about perspectives and right and wrong. That scored him a few points in the intellectual department as well as boosting his confidence. But just the mention of Seifer's proposed execution and he was running from a frenzy of over-reactive thoughts. It had no longer been about doing what SeeD wanted, or what he had been trained to do. It had become a fear of losing his freedom, his rights, and his life over something which no longer seemed to be worthwhile.

Unfortunately, life didn't favour the Commander in the current moment of time, and as he sat there listening to the older men drone on, he found his cool, calm and collected demeanour slowly dissolving.

"Squall, you wrote in your report that during Time Compression you were taken to the past where you stumbled upon a young Edea and yourself." Martine looked up from leafing through a rather bulky yellow folder in his hand.

Squall clearly recognised the file; it was he who had just completed it last night. Had he known it would be used against him, he would have taken his time and edited certain parts out. Their arguments seemed to be provided with a solid basis, one he had just provided for them. There was no morsel of stability left in him, though he continued to keep a strong front, his mind had fully settled into doubt.

"Yes," he replied indignantly.

"Squall, if you were able to go to the past and speak to Edea, that means that the dimension to which you travelled has an Ultimecia," Martine explained. "We can easily be affected by the next-generation Ultimecia. History may repeat itself."

"You don't know that. The next Ultimecia will be taken down by that younger Squall," Squall replied, aggravated by the direction of the conversation.

Of course, he was only fighting his own demons. Once he had travelled back to the present, he had pondered over the fact that travelling back in time and meeting another version of himself obviously meant that in that dimension there was another Ultimecia. It was mind-boggling just thinking about past, present, future and so many versions of oneself. But the case was that Martine could be right.

"We also don't know about the status of our future. There may well be another Sorceress that we have yet to fight," Martine continued, holding his hand out to stop the Commander from replying in haste. "Not Rinoa. Another Sorceress capable of committing the same acts as Ultimecia. I know it's not something you want to think about, but we must for the safety of our people. There is a chance that Ultimecia - a new generation Ultimecia - may strike again."

What response was he to give to that? Sure he hadn't spent a lot of time thinking on the matter himself; for once he had been selfish and just took every day as it came. For once he had listened to Rinoa's advice; he had stopped thinking about _tomorrow _and spent his time enjoying _today_. Funnily enough, it was for reasons like this that the Commander spent so much time contemplating his entire life plan. Sometimes it wasn't enough just to think about today; sometimes life had a nasty habit of throwing shit straight at you, you had to think about the consequences of tomorrow.

"Rinoa." Hearing her name being called out brought him back to reality. Turning to look at his girlfriend's solemn face he felt an instant wave of guilt, though he couldn't place a finger on why he was feeling such an emotion. It wasn't as if he had transported the powers onto her, but he did feel blameworthy for allowing her to get involved in the battle, he should have just listened to Caraway.

Wanting to ask if she was all right, Laguna beat him to it. "Are you all right?"

"I've heard enough." Rinoa sniffed back a sob and looked up at the men teary-eyed. "I'm going to bed, please excuse me."

Before moving past him, she glanced at him briefly, almost as if knowing what he was feeling and letting him know she didn't blame him. Her hand touched his, squeezing momentarily, before she immediately let go and strode out of the room, closing the door firmly shut behind her.

"I am sorry Squall, we didn't mean to upset Rinoa, but there are many obstacles you have coming your way that you need to prepare for," Cid sympathetically remarked.

Squall remained silent, watching the now closed door. He wanted to run after her, he wanted to run away from this conversation. But as usual, his mature responsible self remained seated until he was officially dismissed; that and a minute inquisitive side of him wanted to hear more. This whole scenario would most definitely cause Rinoa to reassess her life and make alterations, regardless of the extraction machine. However, the situation affected him on a similar scale. If she were to give up her powers and cease to remain a sorceress, undoubtedly his Knightship along with their bond would also cease.

Kiros didn't want to be the bearer of bad news, but having been Laguna's constant companion for twenty or so years, he had to stop and think of the consequences for every matter. It was a pain in the backside at times, it wasn't nice being the 'negative' one in the group. But he had an obligation to speak on matters others overlooked. "Even if our arguments are all but mere myths, Rinoa will eventually need to pass her powers onto someone else. If she does not choose correctly, or even if she does, at some point in time we will have to keep in mind that these powers may be passed onto someone just as evil as Adel or Ultimecia."

"That is a fact I'm sure you are well aware of, Squall." Cid had watched Squall intently as the other men continued to broach on the subject. Once Kiros had spoken he could make out the slight flinch in Squall's face. It was very quick and hardly noticeable to the untrained eye. But Squall had been one of his children, he had trained Squall in this very Garden, he knew it was something that Squall had thought about.

"I am." Squall's voice was hardly audible over the beating at his chest. He wasn't sure why he was anxious, it wasn't as if Rinoa's powers needed to be passed onto someone at this precise moment. But his thoughts momentarily retraced the memory of watching as Ultimecia passed her powers to Edea. Squall had immediately thought of Rinoa, he had contemplated on the poor unfortunate soul who would eventually receive such a disgustingly powerful curse. That was what it was, a curse. A sliver of power for a lifetime of misery, the hatred of a nation for the protection of one individual.

* * *

><p>Rinoa bent her head and sighed, closing her eyes and trying to drown out the voices. How ironic that only an hour ago she was revelling at the blissfulness of her life, yet she sat here enduring old men and her 'bodyguard' arguing about what she was capable of doing. Not one of them had stopped to ask her what she wanted or her thoughts on the case. Not that it mattered; she herself didn't know what to think of it.<p>

Presently, her mind was running through the implications pertaining to her relationship with Squall. There were limitations set. She didn't like limitations. Her bond with Squall - which she believed was something special that kept them together - was all but just a deed of protection. There couldn't be any love between them; there couldn't be any intimacy between them. Her eyes becoming wet with tears, the memory of Squall kissing her on the balcony came to mind and she detested the idea of never being able to experience that again.

How was this even fair? What kind of reward was this for helping save the world. Had she know the implications that would be over her, would she have continued in her plight? Would she have spent all that bloody time and effort taking down someone whose powers exceeded their death?

"Rinoa," Laguna called out to the Sorceress. "Are you all right?" he asked softly.

"I've heard enough." She sniffed back a choked sob. "I'm going to bed, please excuse me."

Getting off her chair, she gave Squall a small squeeze of his hand, before brushing her tears away and walking out of the room.

Keeping the tears at bay was easier than she had anticipated. It seemed that her ego was more akin to the current situation than her need to release her anguish. The ride down the lift was quicker than she thought it would take; walking past the loitering students on the ground floor, she willed not to cry in front of them.

It was only after she was in front of her dormroom door and fumbling in her purse for her key card that she felt her eyes moisten. Finally hearing the beep of her door, she threw it open and stepped in, almost slamming it with a hard thud. It seemed that her anguish was catching up fast.

Rinoa threw off her gown, taking off the bobby pins that had clipped her hair back, and chucked them onto her dresser. Her heels were also disposed of angrily to one corner of the room, along with her purse.

What a night it had turned into. She had gone to the party in high hopes and with a wave of happiness. How that came crashing down in a matter of minutes was beyond her.

Grabbing a wet wipe off the packet on her desk, she roughly removed the mascara and eye shadow she had meticulously applied hours ago. All the effort hadn't gone to waste, but there was no other alternative to vent her frustration. If the bitch hadn't already been defeated, Rinoa had a right mind to visit Ultimecia and give her a piece of her mind.

Letting a long frustrated breath out, Rinoa looked at herself in the mirror. She was the same person on the outside, mid-length black hair, medium brown eyes, fair skin and pink lips, but she felt different inside. It was no wonder. At first, she had thought her only worry was about how people would react to her ability to burn down the entire planet. Now she had bigger fish to fry.

At seventeen, there were many things Rinoa hadn't even considered. It wasn't like it was expected of her, she had many years to mature and decide where she wanted her life to be heading. But now, now she was forced to think about her future. A future she may not even have the ability to decide.

Children. Did she want children? Well it's not like it bloody well mattered; she wouldn't be able to have children. Not that she'd be able to even go through the prerequisite to having them.

The problem wasn't that simple though, it wasn't just down to her. There was always someone else to think about, some other poor soul who would also feel the effects of her situation. At the current time, it was Squall. Would Squall want children? It hadn't come up yet. Would Squall be content without sex? Of course not, what single teenager in his right mind would be perfectly fine with giving that up? Although Squall wasn't just the average teen, travelling in time and slaying a futuristic sorceress kinda reduces one's normalcy.

A series of questions ran through Rinoa's mind, and she soon found her eyes watering and her throat hardening. This moment of enlightenment would surely change the dynamic of their relationship. Or what would be left of it.

And to think, he had proposed the week before. In a bittersweet moment, she was half glad she had refused. Undoubtedly, this was the type of regret Rinoa was thinking about. Had she said yes, this little predicament would have hurt tenfold. She didn't want to lose Squall, but she couldn't expect him to stay in a dry and dusty relationship. Squall had finally opened up; there were things he would want to experience, things which she could no longer offer him.

As she sobbed into the now dry wipe, the young sorceress could only feel disappointment. She wasn't given a choice; she didn't have the freedom to make her own decisions. These decisions had been made for her and how she greatly wished for them back.

Was this to be her life now? Never having the freedom to make her own judgements, never being able to live freely and always being confined to rules and regulations? She had once argued with Squall about his lack of a carefree life, submitting to a life of orders and obligations without a spare thought to morals and ethos. Yet now, her life was heading down that same path. Whether she liked it or not, eventually she'd have to pass on her powers to someone else. Eventually she'd have to abstain from the right and wrong and put another soul through the same complications she was currently suffering.

A light knock on her door broke her from her contemplation. Sniffing hard, Rinoa got up from her chair and quickly put on her nightgown. Opening up her door she found Squall standing outside.

"Hey," he whispered, walking in and closing the door behind him.

Rinoa made her way over to her bed, sitting without a care and pulling her legs up. Squall stood in one spot, undecided whether he should sit or remain standing.

"What did they say after I left?" Rinoa asked, looking up at Squall's aloof stance.

"Not much, just repeated the same thing over," he replied, sounding only mildly annoyed.

Rinoa let out a ragged breath, and patted the spot next to her for Squall to sit. It wasn't a great deal, but it was an emotional moment that Squall realised required him to act like the supportive boyfriend. He tried thinking of what he could say to her to comfort her. But in truth, he knew he should tell her what she needed to know, rather than what she wanted to hear. Still, there was his new found endearing self that made a hasty appearance in prospect of soothing her disposition.

"Rinoa, don't worry about this situation," he started off.

But his expectations of their dialogue were not in accordance with reality. The sorceress let out a disheartened huff before letting a couple of tears spill over her sore eyes and trail down her smooth pallid skin. It wasn't many times that Rinoa did outwardly cry, but in the few times he had seen her, he still couldn't get over how beautiful she looked. Though this probably wasn't relevant to their situation, he couldn't get over just how much she took his breath away.

It was as if his hands acted on their own, his fingers making direct contact with her cheek and brushing her tears aside. Giving her a lopsided smile, he hoped at least his outward actions would have a better chance than his words… it didn't.

"How can I not, Squall?" she replied with a sob. "Didn't you hear what they said?"

"We don't know what's true and what's not," Squall tried being comforting again, hoping his second attempt would work.

Again, it didn't.

"Doesn't take a genius to figure it out," she replied pessimistically. "Edea can't have children, and I don't think many other Sorceresses did."

Squall glanced at the grey tile-patterned carpet awkwardly before asking, "Do you want children?"

He watched as she looked at him, her eyes brimmed with tears paused as she contemplated it in her head. Blinking the tears away she answered, "I don't know. I never really thought about it… I guess I always thought one day when I got older and was married, I might have a child… I just…"

She frowned to herself; she couldn't even articulate her thoughts, everything was a jumble. She didn't know what she was upset at: the fact that she couldn't have children, or the fact that it was a decision she couldn't make regardless?

"Do you want children?" she asked, though it was more of a sly way to keep a check on the status of their relationship.

"I don't know…" Squall answered honestly.

The Commander had never thought of it. Only a couple of months ago and he had thought his whole life would be concentrated at Garden. He'd train to become a SeeD, he'd go on to further ranks, join the Alumni and finally try and achieve Instructorship when he became less able. He'd never thought of falling in love and starting a family; growing up in a orphanage had long ago rendered trivial any prospects for a happily-ever-after.

Before Rinoa, Squall never imagined even having any type of relationship with the opposite sex. Ellone had been the closest form of a companion to him, her unexplained and sudden departure leaving him isolated and scared. He hadn't the desire to get closer to another individual save the same thing happening twice, of course this only led him to be completely reclusive, shying away from any form of contact. It took Rinoa a few good attempts to break into his shell and actually open himself up to her.

Not a major step in the direction of his social life; he still kept his stoic expression when walking down the halls, he still kept Irvine and Zell at arms length, but for her he was willing to express himself and that held more weight that anyone could understand.

The brief silence between them was dragging on and Rinoa eventually mumbled in misery, "It's not like I have a way of finding out anyway. Not unless…"

"Do you want to do it?" Squall couldn't help but ask.

He honestly wanted to know if Rinoa thought it better to return to her former state. It wasn't like she had anything to lose, in fact, she'd gain everything back. But he didn't want to influence her judgement, it was a decision she needed to make on her own, for her benefit. Regardless of whether or not he remained as her Knight, his position as her boyfriend was first and foremost. He would support her in whatever decision she made.

"Yeah, everyone does, don't they?" Rinoa replied shyly.

Squall frowned, not understanding her answer. "Not many have gone through what you have."

"I know…" she replied, biting her bottom lip. "Do you want to do it?" she asked feeling a bit apprehensive, unsure whether or not she wanted to hear the answer.

"Me?" Squall confusedly asked. "Why would I want to do it?"

Letting out a giggle, Rinoa replied back, "You don't want to experience something like that?"

"Not really, I don't really the idea of being confined in tight spaces," Squall replied with a shake of his head. Had he not been unconscious, he would have definitely gone into a panic attack in the D-District Prison. A small hexagon shaped room with a poor excuse of a bed and a toilet basin. Just remembering such a tight space, made Squall uncomfortable and he had to remove his blazer.

"Well, not the whole of you." Rinoa winked cheekily, her mood slightly uplifting.

"Huh?" Squall grunted. "Of course it would be the whole of you, how else would it work? Didn't you pay attention to the diagrams?"

"What diagrams?" Rinoa asked wide-eyed.

"The ones they showed us," he answered, looking at his girlfriend as if she'd had a moment of mental stupidity.

"Who?" Rinoa tilted her head and creased her forehead.

"Kiros and Professor Odine," Squall replied as if that was the obvious answer.

"What?" Rinoa cried in shock. "They only showed diagrams of the Junction Machine."

"Those are the diagrams I'm talking about." Squall was clearly confused by Rinoa's memory lapse. "What are you talking about?"

Blushing a shade of crimson, Rinoa put her head into her folded legs. If the ground could swallow her whole this minute she'd jump at the opportunity. "Nothing," she gave a muffled reply back.

As the Commander sat there, processing their conversation in his head, he slowly came to realise where their conversations had differed. Putting a hand to his head, he prevented the small smirk that was dying to emerge and cleared his throat.

Rinoa lifted her head and peeked at her Knight. She wanted to burst into giggles, but that would surely indicate which gutter her mind had travelled to. But as funny as it was, it was something they needed to discuss.

"About the other issue," Rinoa attempted, picking up her head and staring at the bare wall opposite her bed. "The lack of intimacy between us."

"What about it?" Squall uneasily enquired.

He didn't want to lead the conversation into another avenue Rinoa felt she had to take. He knew how he felt about her, and though there were certain constraints at the current moment, it was her call to decide what she wanted to do; he didn't want his desires influencing them. It was her choice after all.

"Cid and Edea couldn't be intimate with one another and neither can we," she recollected softly.

"I don't understand," Squall let out a frustrated thought, "with no other sorceress how can you become possessed?"

"It's not just about that Squall," Rinoa tiredly moaned, shaking her head in irritation, "even if there is no other sorceress, they're scared of me."

"But we know you, you're not like Adel or Ultimecia," the Commander felt compelled to comment.

It was unfair that Rinoa was even put into the same thought as the two other sorceresses. Anyone just had to look at her to realise that she wasn't capable of even hurting a Bite Bug… though she had in battle - but that was a different matter altogether.

"Even so, there is still the matter of future sorceresses that we don't know of," Rinoa replied in dismay.

"They don't know if there are any future sorceress," Squall suggested optimistically, a rarity for the Commander.

They both let out a sigh before replying in unison, "No one can predict the future…"

Laughing lightly, Rinoa moved closer to her knight and wrapped her arms around his neck. Holding him tightly, she let the facts settle. So far, there were many pros to her changing back. She'd have her life back to normal; she'd be given the chance to decide whether or not she wanted children. She could even go to second, third and home base!

But what was holding her back?

"Squall." Rinoa moved her head away from Squall's shoulder to get a better look at him. She looked into his steel-blue eyes as they innocently looked back at her. "When exactly did you start liking me?" she asked vaguely, in fear of wording the question with exaggerated verbs. Though her Knight had already confessed to loving her, she was still a bit hesitant to bring the subject up so loosely.

Squall on the other hand, immediately felt uncomfortable. He actually hadn't expected that question to come up, and he wasn't exactly sure he wanted to answer it. He wasn't even sure where the question had popped out from, it seemed a bit foreign given the line of discussion they were currently on.

The night they defeated Ultimecia he had openly expressed his feelings. But actually telling Rinoa when he started falling for her was a conversation he'd rather avoid.

"Erm, I guess when you fell into that coma," he replied, looking down at her expressionless face to see it change to one of comprehension.

Rinoa wordlessly nodded her head, it seemed it was what she had thought. Squall had started liking her after her transition; before that he had found her annoying, irresponsible and stubborn. They didn't always get along and most of their time they spent bickering.

But waking up to find herself floating in space, hearing Squall call her name and finally seeing his open arms grab her into safety, she had realised there was something between them both. A feeling, a connection she couldn't describe but could only sense. It was obvious she liked him the night they first met. He became slightly aggravating during their mission; but his cold demeanour was only a façade, one that hid all the insecurities from his childhood. He grew on her feelings through the course of their adventure, she tried to prove as much to him the night of the concert at Fisherman's Horizon, but alas, the Commander had a brain as hard as an adamantoise shell and didn't quite pick up the hidden message behind her confession of the group's love for him.

So Squall had confirmed it, he did begin to like her after her transition to a sorceress, and now Rinoa was inclined to believe their relationship stemmed from the root of their bond. She was a Sorceress, he was her Knight, and that was why they were together. If she disposed of her sorceress abilities, would her relationship with Squall cease? Would he not love her anymore?

Holding onto Squall tighter, she was scared to find out. If Odine's theories were true, they couldn't be intimate with one another, they wouldn't be capable of having children if they ever wanted to, though that was far into the future. But those thoughts were less important to her than losing Squall altogether.

Squall had felt Rinoa tensing up within the last few minutes, unsure of what part of their situation was on her mind. He was concerned for her welfare and wanted to ask what was bothering her. Not that it would have made any sense since she could probably list a dozen issues right now, with her current status making top of the list.

"Will you stay the night?" she asked softly, clinging onto his shirt.

Looking into her eyes he didn't have the heart to say no. He had already broken this rule a few nights ago, though that was in favour of his own demonic nightmares. He knew it was a sign of weakness giving into the comfort he found in her, but as a Commander he was an example to all other SeeDs and cadets. He couldn't keep bending (and/or) breaking the rules for his own desires, there was only so many advantages saving the world entitled him to, and currently this was abusing it tad too far.

However, deciding that this was one of their few moments where he needed to be supportive and optimistic, much like how he had been back at the Ragnarok or even when he invaded The Sorceress's Memorial to prevent her from being sealed away (though there was a slight morsel of guilt that drove his actions there), he hugged her intensely, breathing in the sweet scent of her perfume and closing his eyes at the bliss of her presence.

"Sure," he eventually replied.

* * *

><p>It hadn't even gone past three when Squall awoke from yet another dream. Rinoa's head lay heavily placed on his chest, but he could feel the heat and sweat seeping out of his body.<p>

Taking his free arm, he wiped across his forehead, retracing the images in his head. His dreams had become more vivid, more realistic. Yet it was the same dream every night and getting all the more irritating. Seriously, turning into a black Lion, how much more absurd could his dreams get?

He needed to talk to someone and seeing as he was booked into a session in the morning, he would gladly, if not exactly eagerly, see if there was a way to alleviate this unnecessary stress.

Looking down to Rinoa sleeping peacefully half on top of him, he wondered if any of his other friends were experiencing the same thing. Though in Rinoa's case, she had enough nightmares in reality that it was only fair her dreams would remain sweet.

Holding her tightly, he kissed her hair affectionately. It wasn't many nights that they could be 'intimate' as they were at present. Squall realised that there was the possibility that this was probably as far as they'd ever get. Did he care? To some extent, yeah, what eighteen year old guy wouldn't? But he cared more about spending his life with Rinoa, and if that meant endless nights lying in each other's arms, well Squall was happy with that.

* * *

><p>"Commander Squall Leonhart?" A blonde lady called out, standing outside a small office door.<p>

The Commander stood up from his chair in the waiting room and followed the woman into the small office she had been allocated.

As promised, Martine had scheduled each SeeD, plus Rinoa and Irvine into the sessions with the psychiatrist from Garden. She was a small timid-looking woman, wearing a lime green shirt and a brown knee-length skirt. Her blonde hair was tied back in a small bun and her glasses dropping right down to the bottom of her nose. A very cliché look for a therapist, but the Commander guessed she had to look the part.

"Take a seat, please," the woman gestured to the recliner next to her armchair.

As if the situation couldn't get any more stereotypical. But Squall digressed; he sat down and laid his head back.

"I'm Caroline Chambers, and this session we'll just run through some basics," she started off, taking out various sheets of paper from a file and jotting down notes. "Now Squall, before I ask any particular questions, how are you feeling today?"

"I'm all right," Squall replied back without interest.

"Good, and are you or have you noticed any changes since you've returned from your last mission?" she asked while making quick notes.

"What do you mean?" Squall asked, unsure whether or not he should mention his dreams.

"Well, some people go through physical changes, excessive fatigue, headaches, others go through more mental changes like flashbacks and memory lapse," she suggested giving him a few examples of common side effects.

"Er, I do have nightmares," Squall confessed with difficulty.

"Oh, nightmares, yes that would be common." The Doctor nodded, scribbling away.

"It is?" Squall asked with an air of relief.

"Yes, many people suffer nightmares as a result of their experiences in battle. It's pretty normal and it shouldn't persist for too long," the woman replied reassuringly. "What are your dreams about?"

Squall took a long drag of breath through his nose and gently released it. Closing his eyes momentarily, he thought back to the first part of his nightmare.

"It's always the same dream," he started, "I'm with the others; my comrades, and we're fighting this Guardian Force named Griever. Then somehow, my comrades disappear and I'm left standing alone."

The Commander continued relating his nightmare to Dr. Chambers, relating his transformation into the Lion and the surging pain while in the dreamlike state.

"…sometimes when I wake up, my arm is throbbing."

"Yes, that is quite normal; I'm thinking that it's probably a part of your battle that was quite significant. Have you ever had dreams like this before?" Dr. Chambers further enquired.

"No…" Squall replied before adding, "I've never been on a mission like that before."

"No I suppose not," she said with a giggle. "Well I wouldn't worry too much, I think it would be a good idea to check up on these dreams and see if they persist, and if they go on for too long then there are sleeping medications I can prescribe."

Squall nodded in agreement, happy that his experiences weren't abnormal, but at the same time disappointed that the woman hadn't elaborated or explained why he was dreaming of turning into a black lion.

* * *

><p><strong>End Note: <strong>Major thanks to **Jebus Creiss** for the beta reading. This is the end of this arc, the next one is about another five chapters long and I'm hoping you'll like what I have in store. I've already written upto chapter 8 and chapter 10 is intended to be the end of the second arc. I'm letting you all know that I'm giving JC a break after the second arc and will give another beta a go from the third. But you should all thank him for beta'ing three chapters in one go. Very impressive.

By the way, why hasn't anyone spotted/questioned Angelo's absence? :P


	6. Changes

**Author Notes: **Quick update on this to get the ball rolling. This is a new arc, I know the other arc was left incomplete but not every arc will have all its problems solved. Some problems will be carried on or elaborated in other arcs. So in the previous one where Rinoa finds out about the implications surrounding her sorceress status, that will be revisted in the third arc. Similarly, something vital in this chapter will be carried on further into the story in a much later arc.

A side note I just wanted to mention about my writing. So far I've only ever got one review inquiring about my style in regards to third person perspectives, however I have seen other stories where people leave reviews criticising the author for 'jumping from one perspective to another' since the character wouldn't know another's inner feelings/thoughts etc. (This isn't in relation to first-person perspective.) I write my postgames stories loosely with what is known as 'third-person omniscient narrator'. This means that the narration isn't tied down to a single character, but can relate the feelings and thoughts of many. A bit like Jane Austen, if you will. Just bear this in mind when reading people's work since not everyone applies third-person-limited.

Also as advised by my beta, I used the games Jenga and Scrabble in this chapter. I don't own either of these games and I'm not making any money by mentioning them in my story. You won't sue me if you know what's good for you... heed this warning... *runs away in fear***  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 6 – Changes<strong>

If there was one thing Rinoa hated it was being woken up in the mornings. It wasn't because she wasn't a morning person; she loved watching the sunrise, she enjoyed taking a jog before breakfast, she liked waking up early and having the whole day ahead of her. It was the method of being woken up that bothered her to the core of her bone where she felt like pounding the disruptor of sleep.

As far as she could remember, her mother would wake her up by calling her name sweetly, caressing her hair until she tiredly opened her eyes. Caraway had a knack of shouting her name, his voice getting louder the closer he got to her bedroom door. That wasn't so sweet; in fact, if he wasn't her father and she had the ability of magic back then, she probably would have cast a couple of sleep spells over the house to sustain her period of slumber.

Right now it was the same situation; she wasn't being woken up softly, gently with someone cooing her name delicately. Nope, the person behind her door was pounding away, scratching at the bottom of the door as if there was some kind of world emergency for such drastic measures. All right, so it wasn't _that _drastic, but couldn't the disruptor find a better, more methodical way to wake her?

She couldn't comprehend what could be so urgent at ten-thirty in the morning... Okay so ten-thirty wasn't early, but working at a Library six days a week had Rinoa getting up almost as early as Squall. The six o'clock wake up and ten hour shift drained all energy from the Sorceress, and Sunday was the one day she could sleep in without disruption… until today.

Chucking the comforter off her body, Rinoa groggily got off the bed. "I'm coming, I'm coming…" she muttered, adding a few drowsy obscenities at the maniac who continued to massacre her door. She half wanted and expected it to be a Death Claw from all the scratching on the other side. If it was Selphie hyper about some new issue of Timber Maniacs she added to that darn Garden website, Rinoa was sure she'd be tempted to take advantage of her Sorceress abilities. Friend or foe, sleep was not to be messed with!

Finally reaching her door and cursing the person on the other side who still remained stoically fixated on scratching their way in, Rinoa opened the heavy wooden door and met directly with steel-blue eyes.

"Squall!" She glared at him. Surely someone who suffered from nightmares could be compassionate and empathetic enough to allow her peaceful sleep on her day off? But before she could demand an explanation for his erratic behaviour, not to mention what was so dire that he needed to wake her up so early in the morning – well early for Sunday – she was knocked over onto her bottom and pinned to the floor as a brown furry creature settled on her chest and began licking her face.

Instantly she recognised the lick, the smell and the texture of soft shorthaired fur of her female companion.

"Angelo!" Rinoa pushed herself up into a sitting position and grinned at the dog who seemed just as eager and excited to see her. Scratching under her collar, Rinoa realised just who was doing the scratching at her door.

Looking up to Squall, she noticed a small smirk plastered across his face as he looked down at the two of them playing.

"She arrived back today, Zell brought her over."

"So she's been given the all clear?" Rinoa asked in enthusiastic confirmation.

"Sure has. She's been given all her shots and inspected. She's in perfect health. Martine does think it's better that you keep her in your room and only walk her outside Garden. He made it clear that he wants her absolutely away from the Training Centre." Squall gave Rinoa an expectant look hoping his girlfriend would comply.

"Oh absolutely. A place infested with monsters isn't a place a for dog, not that Angelo can't handle the heat, isn't that right girl?" Rinoa cooed to her dog, receiving an excited bark back.

Hugging Angelo to her chest, Rinoa breathed in her scent and smiled up at Squall. Although pets weren't allowed at Garden, she was glad that Cid had made one allowance for Angelo seeing as she did help out during the battle. If anyone deserved more of a right to stay at Garden than Rinoa, it was definitely her friendly brown companion.

"Listen, I gotta head back to the office and then I got another session with Dr. Chambers. I'll meet you later on?"

"Okay, where?" Rinoa asked, still preoccupied with Angelo's freshly washed fur coat and feeling the silkiness of it under her fingers.

"I moved most of my stuff into the other apartment." Squall put his hand into his pocket and produced a white plastic key card. Sliding it between his fingers he braced himself before handing it over to Rinoa. "Here's a spare key card, you can let yourself in."

Taking the spare card off his hand, Rinoa nodded her head and returned her attention to Angelo. Squall stood at the door for a couple more seconds, wondering if Rinoa understood the significance of giving her the key. He had said it was so she could let herself in, but there was more to it, the 'more' being something he couldn't outwardly say. It made him nervous, embarrassed, and not to mention it felt really geeky to acknowledge it was his way of taking a step forward in their relationship.

The card wasn't just for today. He meant what he said; it was for Rinoa to let herself in whenever she wanted, that way he didn't need to open the door for her. Okay well that didn't come out right, now he just sounded lazy! That wasn't what he meant by the gesture, good thing he hadn't verbalised his thoughts to Rinoa.

"You can keep that." Squall looked at Rinoa hesitantly, watching her carefully as she looked up to him and then down at the card unwittingly.

It took a couple of seconds for her to realise what she was holding. It wasn't just a plastic key card anymore, it was full access to Squall's new place and he had just handed it over easily.

"Oh." Rinoa remained seated on her carpeted floor, somewhat speechless. "Thanks." She finally managed before giving him another smile, he was really surprising her lately.

Shooting up off the floor, she tiptoed until she semi-reached his level and placed a kiss on his lips.

"I mean it, thanks for this and bringing Angelo to me."

"No problem," Squall replied, patting her lower back before nodding and turning around. He had only taken a few steps before he heard Rinoa's door shut and Angelo excitedly bark.

Honestly, he had been apprehensive at first about giving her the key; he didn't know how she'd react. Asking her to marry him had her laughing in his face though it wasn't in a malicious or bitchy way, but it did hurt. He just hoped he was making the right decisions, taking the right step to further their relationship. He truly loved her and wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. Sure that was a little cliché and dramatic, but seeing everything in front of him disappear, and almost dying post-Ultimecia, scared him to think he wouldn't have a future with her.

He hoped he wasn't moving too fast for her, the last thing he wanted was to scare her off. But she had accepted the invitation and seemed happy enough about it. So maybe there was nothing to worry about. Maybe it was time for Squall to just accept that there was no drama in his life and just take Rinoa's advice and enjoy today.

* * *

><p>Placing the last decorated purple cushion on the leather black sofa, Rinoa stood back to admire her decorating abilities. Garden had been kind enough to provide Squall with a much bigger room in the better part of the living quarters. It was only natural that the elite SeeDs and Garden faculty would be given blessings of such luxurious apartments. This humble abode consisted of an open plan lounge and kitchenette four times bigger than the dorm he shared when he was a cadet. An added bonus was the spacious fully-fitted and tiled bathroom.<p>

Garden wasn't short of money; the furniture with its SeeD embossed logo was of much better quality than the lesser generic brand that housed the normal dorms. The chairs and bed frames were made from the finest of Timber's oak wood, the granite countertop in the kitchenette exported from the best showroom in Deling City. The leather furniture, something which was very much to Squall's liking, was only the best.

Yet now, the entire lounge area was an assortment of leather and glass furniture with purple and pink cushions, throws and the cutest little pots of potpourri.

Squall would definitely love the upgraded look of his new apartment. His now bigger apartment would be a haven away from the constant remembrance of his life at Garden. Rinoa wanted it to be a place of tranquillity, a place of peace, complete with cute pink and purple decorations.

After a very late brunch, Rinoa had popped into the new apartment to inspect how the high life was living. Sure it was spacious, but it was grossly generic. She had immediately returned to her apartment and picked up Angelo, killing two duties in one go by walking her to the Balamb Furniture shop. There she had bought all the necessary knick-knacks and ornaments to spruce up Squall's bland abode. It was the least she could do for him bringing Angelo back to her.

Hearing the swipe of a key card at the front door, Rinoa turned to see an expressionless Squall enter his new apartment.

"Surprise!" the sorceress cried overenthusiastically, throwing her arms up in the air.

Squall looked around the room, evidently noticing the _subtle_ changes she had made. When he had left his room in the morning he was pretty content with the way it was decorated; a bachelor's pad as Irvine had put it, expensive modern, yet comfortable furniture. Yet now, that all seemed to be merged with a twelve year old girl's bedroom.

"It's pink." Squall observed the different additions in his lounge.

"And purple," Rinoa added holding up the purple cushion with a grin. "This apartment was in some serious need of colour."

Squall nodded in awe. Only Rinoa would be clueless enough to think Squall would be concerned with adding some 'colour' to his otherwise bland home. It wasn't like Squall to care about aesthetics, unless it came to clothing. But generally, Squall used his room as a place to sleep after a long and tiring day.

Not having the heart to tell Rinoa what he really thought about the room, Squall merely smiled and took a seat on the once leather sofa hidden by the fuzzy pink comforter. Rinoa's efforts to redecorate were only a preventative measure from musing on her little predicament. They hadn't talked about the matter since the night of Cid's party, letting their emotions and minds settle with what could possibly lie ahead of them.

Joining her on the sofa, Squall allowed Rinoa to put her feet up and cuddle up next to him.

"How did the session go?" she asked, remembering his whereabouts.

"Pretty much all right," he replied, stroking her hair back.

"What did you talk about?"

"Mainly the whole sleeping problem, some other personal stuff," he replied making a face at the last note.

"Like?" Rinoa enquired further.

"Like family issues, any personal matters, stress that can affect sleeping," Squall answered with a roll of his eyes, "good thing I have none."

"Oh," Rinoa replied, unsure of how to respond to that little statement. "Well I hope she doesn't ask me about father issues, or I'll be there forever."

"You and I both," Squall instantly let out and immediately regretted it.

"What?" Rinoa asked curiously, sensing something on Squall's mind.

Staring at her with apprehension, the Commander wasn't sure if he should broach that subject. He hardly had the time to digest it himself and in all honestly, felt if he didn't think about the situation it wouldn't exist. A notion that was, of course ridiculous, but not as ridiculous as finding out your father was none other than the moron that sometimes vacated your dreams. In fact, if Squall had to choose which to go through, he would much rather suffer the transformation of him turning into a black lion than have to endure Laguna's antics all over again.

"I, uh, I found out who my father is," Squall said with difficulty. There's a sentence he'd never expect to utter.

"Who?" Rinoa asked in shock. Immediately sitting onto the front of her legs and holding onto Squall's shoulder, more of bracing herself than him.

"You won't be impressed," Squall quickly deflated any expectations from Rinoa. "Laguna."

"What?" Rinoa cried, covering her mouth from laugher. "As in Laguna Loire?"

She couldn't help but laugh at the weird turn of fate. Squall Stoic Leonhart, the son of one of the giddiest men on the planet? If that was true, Squall definitely didn't inherit any sense of humour or optimism from the President.

"Trust me, no one else was as shocked as I was," Squall bitterly responded.

"Oh Squall, he's not bad, sure he's eccentric and sometimes comes out with the most bizarre comments," Rinoa observed remembering the comment's about Squall's eyes, "but you could be worse off. I like Laguna," she concluded smiling at the memory of the man.

"I think having Laguna as your father is as worse as it ever gets," Squall responded, not being moved by his girlfriend's persuasive thinking.

"Trust me; he's probably a better father than Caraway ever was." This time it was the sorceress's turn to be bitter.

Squall observed Rinoa's change of attitude; it seemed the hostile relationship between father and daughter hadn't ceased. He'd half expected that Rinoa would see Caraway's concern for her through his attempts to prevent her from continuing with the resistance faction. In some evil twist of fate, Caraway had been right all along; Rinoa wasn't trained and her blunders through their adventures were living proof. What he had feared all along ended up being the result of the aftermath.

Squall expected Caraway would send a faction of Galbadian soldiers after him if he ever learned about Rinoa inheriting sorceress powers.

"Would you ever want to make amends?" Squall asked, continuing his earlier action of stroking her hair and placing a loose strand behind her ear.

Rinoa thought about it before replying, again it was a situation she hadn't properly thought about. She guessed that now Timber was openly fighting for independence and Ultimecia had been defeated, maybe things could go back to normal with her father. But that was only on the condition if he was willing and allowed her to make her own decisions.

"I don't know, Caraway is a difficult man to have any kind of relationship with," she replied honestly. "But he's the only parent I have, I wouldn't want anything happening to him and regretting the fact that we didn't get along."

"So, you'd want to continue having him in your life?" Squall enquired further.

"Yeah, I guess I do," Rinoa replied, though without her normal smile.

Sighing as if to change the direction of their conversation, Rinoa turned to Squall and raised her eyebrows. He knew what she was after, honestly he would have elaborated more but he was Squall. For him, conversing was never easy, he always needed to be coaxed or in the instances with Zell, pestered into a discussion.

Even back at the orphanage with the disappearance of Ellone, Squall had secluded himself, unwilling to explain to the others why he was so upset. Matron was the first to recognise that with the disappearance of his "safety-blanket", Squall's confidence followed. It took some time to finally get him to open up and be able to speak about his fear of being alone, a couple of days later he cried out to Matron that he still couldn't find 'Sis'. It was a hard time for him, a hard thing to accept, but even harder for him to talk about.

Not giving up, Rinoa turned on her boyfriend and began her investigation.

"So… when? How? And what does this mean for you both?" Her questions were pretty vague, but Squall didn't need any further words to understand her inquiry.

Taking a deep breath, Squall looked down at his open hands before answering the first of her questions.

"At Cid's party, when Laguna called me to the balcony to discuss something." Rinoa smiled and nodded, she had wondered what the two men were up to.

"How did he tell you?" she enquired further.

"Well, we sort of nearly had this conversation back in the Ragnorak before the whole Time Compression and Lunatic Pandora. I remember him telling me we had to talk… I guess he put it off considering our situation."

"That was considerate of him." Squall could identify Rinoa felt obliged to make positive comments about the President in case he was still harbouring first impressions of the man. It wasn't Laguna's fault that Squall had been dumped into his mind; surely if they had met face to face there was a slight possible chance that Squall would have respected the man. Slight and possible being the key words.

"I guess." Squall remained indifferent. "He told me about Raine… er…" It was hard for him to utter the word. His mother. That was surreal in itself.

"Raine?"

Squall's sight moved back to the safety of his hands. Why was it hard for him to say the word mother? If he could jokingly tell Rinoa about his pathetic father, than surely this was no different? Or maybe it was. Maybe the knowledge of not having a mother was harder. Maybe the fact that he had a choice of whether he wanted to pursue a relationship with Laguna was easier to digest than the fact that he'd never get the chance with Raine. She was gone. Maybe that's why it was so hard.

"Raine was… pregnant when Laguna left to search for Ellone." Squall faltered in his explanation. His eyes betrayed his cool exterior and seeing the comforting expression on Rinoa's face, he knew she was aware of the difficulty to discuss the topic. He had already opened up substantially, and she didn't want to force him into anything he found uncomfortable.

"Where is she now?" Rinoa asked apprehensively.

"She passed away when I was born." Though his words were quiet his face gave away no show of hurt. It wasn't like her death was a big shock. He had already thought his parents died long ago in the Second Sorceress's war. That was the story he had fed and brought himself up on. It was easier to think that his parents were killed in a war nearly eighteen years ago, parents that he'd never see again. To find out they weren't, that one was living a continent away and the other... died giving birth to him... it made him feel as if the earth was swept from underneath his feet.

Rinoa watched Squall's expression remain indifferent and emotionless. "What did you say after he told you?"

Squall breathed deeply again before replying, "I didn't say anything. I just said I needed to get back. He asked if I was all right before I left for the hall."

"And were you?" Rinoa looked straight into Squall's eyes as if trying to see his true emotions from that night.

"Honestly? Not really, but I told him I was and left it at that."

As if getting off the couch would move off the topic, Squall stood up and stretched his legs. He still wasn't able to fully discuss the situation with Laguna, not that he felt he ever would be. But right now there were things that needed to be done in the office and he couldn't sit around idly chatting about a family he never knew he had.

"I need to head back to the office." Squall thinly smiled at Rinoa hoping she didn't take offence to the brush off.

"Okay, I'm going to spend some time with Selphie and Quistis in an hour." Rinoa remained seated on the sofa as Squall made his way towards the door.

Before opening the door, Squall turned abruptly and looked straight at his girlfriend.

"Ah, I'd appreciate it if you didn't-"

"I won't tell anyone, Squall." Rinoa smiled at him truthfully. "It's not my place to."

Smiling back, Squall nodded before opening the door and heading out.

* * *

><p>"Jenga!"<p>

"Selphie, you nudged my arm!" Rinoa cried out, hands positioned on her hips like an angry teacher.

"Did not!" Selphie cried out mimicking Rinoa's moves before the two girls let out a series of giggles.

"Can we play something that requires some actual thinking?" Quistis commented from her seat on the brunette's floor, amused at the choice of game the girls had picked.

"Like what?" Rinoa asked, picking up the various wooden pieces off the floor and under Selphie's bed.

"How about Scrabble?"

"Oh, but I don't know big words." Selphie picked up the Scrabble box in fear.

"You don't need to know big words, it'll be fun." Quistis took the box off the brunette and began assembling the fold-out board.

The three girls had gathered at Selphie's dorm after a long week back to Garden duties. Though Rinoa was never officially on a break, what with getting a job at the Library, the others had enjoyed their break away from missions and classes before returning to work. Selphie had already had been given a new mission, a bizarre mission at that, to escort the Card Queen to the first (of hopefully many) annual Triple Triad World Cup held in Deling City.

Quistis had been shadowing Squall the past week, observing and aiding him in planning mission objectives and practices. It was such a lot to learn, a lot to take on, that the former Instructor found herself doubting her skills. Cid had said she was ready, that they had misjudged her ability on the basis of Seifer's actions. But she couldn't help but feel they weren't far off. Maybe they were wrong to take away her instructor's license, but a job of this scale? Squall seemed to barely manage to hold the fort together; she doubted she would be any better.

Unknown to herself, the Instructor let out a nervous sigh just thinking about it.

"Quisty?" Selphie asked concerned.

"Hm?" The Instructor looked up through her spectacles as if noticing the girl for the first time.

"What's wrong?" Rinoa asked, sensing something on her friend's mind.

"Oh nothing, just thinking about work," she offhandedly replied.

"What about it?" Selphie persisted.

Letting out another tired and anxious sigh, Quistis placed her small square letters down and stared at the space between Selphie's head and her wardrobe. She didn't want to voice her concerns in fear of making them come true, as stupid as that sounded. But she couldn't prevent her doubts from blurting out.

"I'm just not sure if Cid made a right decision about Squall and myself."

"What do you mean?" Rinoa asked with a frown.

"I don't doubt Squall's ability," Quistis quickly interjected to save Rinoa from defending her boyfriend, "I'm just not sure if Cid made the right decision about me. I don't know if I'm ready to be a commander."

"But we've seen you in battle, Quisty, you rock!" Selphie commented supportively.

The Instructor smiled at the girl in appreciation, "Thanks Selphie, but shouting out commands and battle tactics is a lot simpler than a commander's duties. There's just so much planning, so many things to think about in such a small timescale."

The two girls listened silently, not sure of what exactly Quistis was apprehensive about. Seeing their blank faces, Quistis continued on, "It's not as easy as thinking about how to get from A to B. Along the way you have to think about C, D and E popping up."

The girls still didn't answer so Quistis let out another sigh with a roll of her eyes.

"I just don't think I have enough experience or knowledge in the field. I'd be second guessing everything. The other day I was observing Squall put together a premise for a B rank job. The SeeDs were to be dispatched to the Island Closest to Heaven and retrieve some Malboro tentacles for Blue Magic."

"Okay, that's what you specialise in, so what was the problem?" Rinoa asked, popping a pretzel into her mouth and sucking away at the salty treat before quietly chewing into it.

"Exactly, I specialise in the field of Blue Magic. I knew exactly what procedures to use to obtain the Malboro tentacles, what status effects the SeeDs would be prone to, what curative measures that would need to be taken. I even knew that there was a better chance of battle success if it was pre-emptive," Quistis continued on, counting each point on her fingers.

"What I didn't know was the stuff not entirely obvious in the textbooks. I made a suggestion to Squall, get the SeeDs to venture to the Island Closest to Hell as they're more inclined to run into Malboros there."

"But there's tons of other monsters there, and there's already SeeD dispatched there to clean up after the Lunar Cry," Rinoa observed.

"Oh I know. I thought it was a good suggestion, like killing two birds with one stone, or in this case, using other SeeDs to lure in Malboros and have our newly dispatched SeeDs attack from behind." Quistis leaned back against the edge of Selphie's bed disappointedly.

"That sounds like a good plan," Selphie agreed, still unaware of Quistis's problem.

"I thought so too, until Squall mentioned that the Island Closest to Hell has a high altitude and so the wind levels increase substantially in a matter of seconds, not to forget the direction of the wind also changes frequently. Even if we get one batch of SeeDs to lure a Malboro in, it will attack first with its Bad Breath, and the harsh wind can cause the stench to spread out up to a three mile radius if it's a level one hundred Malboro."

"So even if the other batch of SeeDs attack from behind, they'll still get caught in the attack." Rinoa nodded in understanding.

"Exactly."

"But, if you have the SeeDs junction status defence then surely it won't matter," Selphie quipped.

"That's what I said," Quistis replied to the younger girl depressingly. "But then Squall pointed out that you can junction up to four status defence magics. An attack of Bad Breath bears five."

"Five?" Rinoa asked further.

"Yep, Confuse, Bio, Blind, Sleep and Silence." Quistis sat up in defeat and began sifting through her letter pieces with a smile. "Oh and on the off chance, Slow, Berserk and Petrify too."

"So that means, either way you're screwed by an attack since at least one of the status magics will affect you," Rinoa continued to ponder.

"Yeah pretty much. Even if you junction Pain to your status defence, which should do the job of protecting you from Silence, Bio and Blind, there will always be one status magic you can't junction. If you don't junction Confuse to your status defence, you'll not only be injuring yourself but also your comrades."

"Okay, what if you junction Pain and then Confuse?" Selphie asked.

"Well, then you'll be saving your health and your comrades, but the other magic will take affect." Quistis place another letter on the board before continuing. "All right, say you don't junction Slow to your status defence, then you're at disadvantage to being attacked before you get the chance to evade or counter.

"But if you don't junction Break, you may not be confused about who your enemy is, or be inclined to sleep in battle, you definitely won't have your health depleting but you're completely useless." Quistis took a deep laboured breath shaking her head. "Then there's the whole Berserk effect that's an even bigger pain in the ass."

"Yeah… but boy do you become volatile. I've seen Zell with a Berserk spell cast on him and he deals as much damage as Squall with a Limit Break," Selphie mused excitedly.

"Don't let Squall hear you say that," Rinoa muttered under her breath.

"Or Irvine," Quistis followed teasingly.

"So what's the answer to this problem? I mean you can't not junction Break to counter Petrify, otherwise you'll be just as useless as someone who's confused in battle."

"Well after much deliberation, we set six SeeDs different junctions; each one had to junction Pain as a compulsory basis. Then the spare junction space could be filled with the remaining three magics, bearing in mind that they all should have the necessary supplies to take care of Confuse and Petrify."

"There's no way I would have thought of that," Selphie remarked depressingly.

"Well I didn't either, Squall came up with it, and I just sat there twiddling my thumbs wondering back to how we took down Malboros."

"I'm pretty sure we only took down one, I distinctly remember Squall avoiding them at all costs." Rinoa rearranged her legs below her with a lopsided smile. Facing a Malboro was a tough job so naturally it was the only time her fearless Knight had avoided a battle. Well apart from when he needed those Malboro Tentacles for Quistis to upgrade to Save The Queen.

"It was while I sat there gawking at him writing up the plan that he added the all-important factor; if any of the SeeDs junctioned Treatment to their Command Ability, then even if they're affected with the status ailments, they'd still be able to use that command." Quistis shook her head disappointedly as Rinoa lent her a comforting hand, squeezing her shoulder and displaying a sad smile.

"This was a B rank mission and I didn't have a clue how to approach the subject. It's all fine when I'm in the classroom teaching off of textbooks, but applying theory to practise is a lot harder. I don't know what I'm going to do." Quistis huffed again and placed the last letter down, and raised her eyebrows at her friends.

The two girls looked down at the Scrabble board and noticed the word displayed.

"Ten points, Escape." Quistis laughed with the other two following suit.

"You'll be fine. You're still training, it's not like you were supposed to go into this job and know everything like the back of your hand. It'll take time; you'll get there in the end." Rinoa tried being optimistic for her friend, but a part of her was also concerned. Cid had given away the positions to the two SeeDs so freely. It seemed that though taking down Ultimecia was a great task, it had exaggerated Squall and Quistis's abilities. Rinoa only hoped their hopes wouldn't crumble along with their job.

"I guess," Quistis obligingly replied.

"Has Squall said anything?" Rinoa quickly asked, wondering if her boyfriend was having the same doubts.

"Not to me, he seems to be pretty hands on with his job… but sometimes he does seem as overwhelmed as I am. I don't know… I'm rambling now." Quistis threw her hands up in her hair and let loose her ponytail.

"Calm down, Quisty," Selphie patted the girl's knee. "If you need more time you should speak to Martine."

"Ah no! He's busy acting as Headmaster and if I speak to him about this I'll just look incompetent."

"I'm sure you won't, and the more time you get observing Squall, the more time he'll get training as Headmaster. You know he wasn't so sure about this position?" Rinoa remarked matter-of-factly.

"Really?" Selphie and Quistis asked in unison, though neither had any hint of surprise in their tone.

"Yeah, he may put up a front, he looks the part but sometimes I think even Squall has a tough time commanding Garden let alone taking over as Headmaster. I don't think he feels he's experienced enough." Rinoa looked at the floor, thinking back to the conversation she had with Squall the day he had told her of the promotion. She had encouraged him to go ahead; she felt no one was better for the job. She hadn't however, thought about the demands and expectations that he may not have been prepared for. Sure he had completed the biggest goal of Garden, but that wasn't equivalent to having years of experience and qualifications as a Headmaster. She felt guilty that she hadn't stopped to question his anxieties and see if there was actually a reason to decline.

It didn't matter anyhow, she had already given her support and Squall had already said yes. The only thing Rinoa could do was hope that he wasn't facing the same apprehensions as Quistis.

* * *

><p>Squall sat at his desk staring at the computer screen of a grid-like sheet of God knew what. His eyes were tingling in pain, he could feel the small red veins pop out near his irises as he tried in vain to understand the damn computerised grid.<p>

He had been sitting at his desk for four hours straight, staring at the cursed computer screen for an hour, yet he still sat dumbfounded. How on earth did Martine expect him to understand a bunch of jargon jumbled up into lines and boxes without explanation?

Taking his sore eyes off the screen Squall looked down at the yellow poster-it note stuck on a file with the words "To be completed by Monday" written in black ink. He sighed internally. All his time in the office seemed to be paperwork, reports, files and some proposal or other, and that was just his Commander duties. On the other side of his desk sat four large bulky black folders with Mid-term plans and schemes of work he was expected to look over.

Just looking at the sheer amount of work piling up on his desk the Commander wanted to scream. Well not scream so much as let out a low grunt, a roar even. He was flattered to be offered the job, yet looking at all the damn folders and files littering his workstation he couldn't help but get mad at Cid. The git did have a tendency to disappear when the going got tough, or mundane in this circumstance.

Aside from that, it was even harder to concentrate on work now that he had access to certain confidential files he knew he had already taken advantage of by peeking into them. But the temptation to stop and peruse them fully was hard to surmount, especially when the files where directly connected to him, or more significantly, his ability and reason for being at Garden.

It was an intriguing prospect, one that had him searching through the Garden archives, Internet websites and online forums for more information. Sighing, Squall moved some of the files around to grab a notepad and accidentally knocked over his coffee cup, spilling the now cold beverage he had only taken two sips of when it was lukewarm. The liquid quickly seeped into a couple of the paper files and sheets of paper sitting on the cluttered desk.

"Shit!" the Commander grunted, getting up and grabbing a couple of tissues from the box inside his drawer. Dabbing at the liquid, he managed to get it off his desk, but alas the caffeinated drink had already stained the folders. Just what he needed.

Chucking the used tissue in the bin, he discarded the folders, taking out the papers inside and leaving them on his chair. Walking out of Cid's office, he went to the stationary closet at the far end of the third floor foyer and took out a couple of brand new folders.

Returning to the office, Squall began transferring the documents into the folders, relieved that most of the documents hadn't suffered the same fate as their previous home. The few papers that had were still drenched in cold coffee water. Squall could make out the headings and was a little relieved that he could easily find softcopies of the documents on his hard drive and print them out.

Clearing his desk Squall could only scold himself for his blunder. Sure he was fortunate to have backups, but a silly mistake like spilling coffee onto his desk when there were contracts and deeds laying around would have been a lot worse. He had to get it together, stress or no stress. This job was his now, he'd just have to endure it.


	7. Misconception

**Author**** Notes: **I actually should allocate months to indicate how much time is passing. Looking at the timing of the game, it states that the SeeD written and field test was in Spring. Now given that I live in England and I've been writing this story in English-UK, it would only be fitting for me to emulate their Spring to ours which is around March/April (I was born on the 1st of March if anyone cares, just two days before Rinoa ^_^).

I'm going to take a long shot and just assume the entire mission from meeting Rinoa in Timber, and defeating Ultimecia in Time Compression, took six months. I know that must be stretching it, but I have to put some kind of timing to this story. I'm starting right from the night of post-Ultimecia and working my way to Squall sitting in a Dollet beach. I'm amazed at Ashbear's ability to keep so organised in _Dancing __in__ Time_ and _Endless__ Waltz,_ but I don't think my story will ever be so thorough. So I'll just state the months as they pass. Oh and FYI, I know someone is bound to say 'Oh but in the game they didn't celebrate any birthdays. :(' It is sad, but they had a sorceress to kill so unfortunately Squall has already turned 18. I will have to go back and fix all my silly mistakes of writing in 'seventeen year old'. *sigh*

Also on a side note, you may find the format of my ellipses strange at first. They're not in the typically used 'a...b' form but rather 'a . . . b' This is apparently the "correct" way, or so I am told in my study of the English Grammar (yeah, I'm having that much fun at Uni... honest. Oops! I mean . . . honest!)

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter<strong>** 7**** – ****Misconception**

_**-November-**_

"Rinoa Heartilly?" Dr. Chambers stood at the threshold of the door once again, waiting for her client to come in. She had only been at Garden for two weeks now, but her acquaintance with the four SeeDs plus Rinoa and Irvine was getting better. She smiled as Rinoa walked up and followed her into the small office, watching her take a seat on the leather recliner. The counsellor leaned over the back of her armchair, arms casually draped on the headrest.

"So, how are you feeling this week?" Dr. Chambers asked casually, tilting her head to one side and inspecting the younger girl with an air of concern.

"A lot better than last week," Rinoa shyly answered, though her words were a pathetically snide stab at the people who ruined a lovely end to a well deserved party.

Initially something that they had organised for Cid, had also contributed in allowing the SeeDs extra relaxation; enjoying a more thought-out and well-planned party compared to the quick round of barbecued Hotdogs prepared the night they defeated Ultimecia. It could almost be seen as a commending pat on the back, only for the Sorceress her pat was more of a shove, with the knowledge behind her sorcery being an added kick in the gut. A wave of embarrassment passed through her as she remembered her last encounter with the Doctor the day after: teary-eyed, biting her lip, and recollecting all her fears from Time Compression and what was to come. The meeting hadn't lasted very long, so Rinoa resolved to elaborate today.

"Doctor, this session is strictly confidential, right?" Rinoa asked.

"Yes, of course," the Doctor replied. "Anything you tell me is just between the two of us. If I feel there are any issues or complications regarding your health, then I will inform Dr. Kadowaki - with your knowledge, however."

"Okay . . ." Rinoa paused, biting her lip again and preparing herself mentally for what she wanted to convey. "Erm, well basically I have this problem."

"Mhmm," Dr. Chambers nodded her head and blinked understandingly, giving Rinoa the time to continue.

"It's regarding my health, er, Dr. Kadowaki already knows about my situation." Releasing a harsh breath, Rinoa sulked at her inability to properly articulate her thoughts. It was a struggle trying to get her words out, verbalising the string of thoughts that were barraging their way through the bottleneck and demanding release. But where to start? And how much to tell? The struggle was trying to judge how much to educate the Doctor on the matter.

"Take your time, Rinoa; there's no rush." Dr. Chambers smiled again, as if reassuring the Sorceress that whatever she wanted to discuss would be welcomed.

Rinoa thought for a second, deep and hard, where to start. "After our battle with Sorceress Edea at Galbadia Garden, I fell into a coma. When I woke up, I was diagnosed with an illness."

That was somewhat true. It pained her not to be able to just blurt out what was wrong with her, but the Doctor was still an imperfect human, and Rinoa just couldn't chance the truth being met with revolted judgement. Only a handful of people knew about her condition, and those were her closest friends and Garden officials. God only knew how people would react once they found out . . . but Rinoa just couldn't bring herself to think down that path.

"I recently found out that my illness is severer than I had anticipated." Rinoa eventually resumed vocalising her thoughts, piece by piece she formulated brave sentences until she was able to successfully mould together a story that she hoped wavered the Doctor into thinking it was a health implication. As the time ticked on, she finally concluded, choking a sob in the process to appear in control, ". . . They're saying that I may never even be able to have children."

Looking at the Doctor through her tearful eyes, Rinoa watched as Dr. Chambers took off her spectacles, scooted closer towards her and placed a delicate hand on her shoulder.

"Rinoa, first of all, I'm sorry to hear about your illness. I think opening yourself up in today's session is probably one of the best things you could have done for yourself; it's never easy to talk about these issues, but I'm glad you did." Dr. Chambers swallowed, pausing in her speech. "You said Dr. Kadowaki is aware of your condition, I think it would be in your best interest to speak to her on a regular basis and monitor your illness - forgive me if you already are. I, however, will be here for you to talk about this, if you want."

"Thank you." Rinoa smiled at the older woman, relieved at her kind words.

"Okay, we don't have long; I'm seeing Mr Dincht in five minutes, but I would like you to carry out a small exercise for me. I don't ever just talk about a problem without having the recipient make notes on their feelings. Because let's face it, I'm being entirely honest, it's not like I can fix this issue. But I can be of help to enable you to deal with it."

"Thank you," Rinoa repeated again, she grimaced at finding nothing else to say, but truthfully, she was dry of any further thought or word.

"Since this is all fresh in your head, tonight, if not early tomorrow morning as I am sure you're a very busy girl," the doctor winked at her cheekily, "I want you to write down all your feelings, anxieties and issues surrounding your illness. That way, next week we can talk about it thoroughly, if not at least I will get a better understanding. I'm really sorry, but Martine only scheduled half an hour sessions, and time flies by swiftly when you're seated here."

"No that's okay. Erm, how should I write down everything?" Rinoa asked.

"Just on a notepad, maybe a spider or star diagram would be best. You can jot down any initial feelings you had when you first were diagnosed, and then work your way across with how you're feeling now."

"Okay . . . thank you," Rinoa repeated for the third time, but wholeheartedly meant it.

"No problem, I'm here to help." Dr. Chambers smiled again.

* * *

><p>"Squall?"<p>

Squall discreetly jumped, startled at hearing his own name, and frantically began minimising the web browsers he had open, as well as shuffling the papers around him to act busy and pull over a façade of being engrossed with his work. Without a doubt, Martine wouldn't be pleased to catch him engaged in personal work, work which blatantly involved abusing his title and taking advantage of private files.

Looking up at the acting Headmaster, Squall gave him a casually inquisitive look as Martine made his way round the desk and stood next to Squall, holding out the folder Squall had completed a few days ago.

"I had a look over the file, but there's a part that's a bit confusing, also this section here," Martine pointed at one of the clauses, "it sounds a bit wishy-washy. Can you go over it a second time for me?"

"Uhm, yeah sure." Squall took the file from Martine's hand, biting his tongue in annoyance. He had hoped that would be the last he'd see of that damn file.

"Good, and just this section here," Martine stated, leafing through a couple of pages until he found the one he desired. "You wrote here, '_The__ following __denote__ the__ client,__ representative __and __mission__ goal. __The__ resistance __faction: __Forest __Eagles, __will __be __substituted__ with__ 'Party__ A'. __Seed __will __be __substituted__ with __'Party__ B' __.__ . __."_

Squall nodded, as Martine then turned to another page and pointed at another clause. "But here you wrote, '_SeeD__ reserves__ the__ right__ to __detain __and __interrogate__ any __resistance __faction __members __before __handing __them __over __to __Party __A. '_I thought Party A was the resistance faction, or is this mission _faction__ against__ faction_?" Martine cocked a knowing eyebrow, indicating that he already knew the answer.

"No, I must have made a typo." Squall excused himself, mentally reproaching himself for such a rookie mistake.

"Okay, no worries. Just be a bit more vigilant in future, Squall. These contracts are serious business. If you show any sign of disloyalty, or worse: incompetence, we'll lose this job." Martine gave Squall a sympathetic knowing look, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder and squeezing it as Squall nodded at him solemnly.

"Yeah, I understand. Won't happen again." Squall determinedly resolved, as much to himself than to Martine.

Martine excused himself and made his way out of Cid's office as Squall sat in silence for two minutes. All right, it wasn't such a big crime, a small typo he'd made because he was just too exhausted to read over the contract one last time, and he had more pressing matters, matters that were currently a minimised web browser.

He couldn't help it. Ever since he had stumbled upon those files he had been so consumed in learning more about his reason as a SeeD, or more importantly, his capability. He had become more interested in learning about topics he had once preferred to drone out in class, material that was never fully delved into, than sit and write up contracts for pending operations. What had started out as a simple search on-line had turned into a full-blown history investigation. It didn't help that he was now marking similarities between himself and a certain eccentric Estharian. He assumed Cid had just used the example as a ploy to have him graduate as a SeeD, but for Squall it had turned into something far greater. In a twisted sense, he was half thankful for the opportunity to be Commander; though he was severely slacking in his duties at the current time, he was making use of (and/or abusing) his title in other ways.

However, as fascinating as an independent historical investigation went, Squall had promised he would concentrate on his work. He had vowed to continue performing to the best of his ability, this was his job and it had to come first. Coffee stained papers were the result of his negligence once; he couldn't afford a series of mishaps that would only aid in questioning his ability and inhibitions revolving around his title. He couldn't slack off any longer, no matter how strong his desire to go slightly astray.

"Shit," Squall whispered underneath his breath. A sick feeling in his gut started churning; he could taste something foul at the back of his throat. Blunder. Failure. Negligence. He couldn't believe how absorbed in _extracurricular__ activities_ he had been that he'd gone and overlooked something as small as a typo. A typo that could have cost him the entire job.

He shook his head at his mistakes, but kicked himself for his reaction. A shaking of his head wouldn't fix this situation, acknowledging his fault wasn't going to correct that typo. But closing the browser and putting his secret investigation aside would. Reluctantly, Squall did just that.

* * *

><p>"Ew!"<p>

"Oh my God!"

"Whose is that?"

Rinoa hurriedly ran over to the three cadets currently in shock at the invasion and mauling of their precious Hotdog by an unforgiving short-haired canine. Angelo was never disobedient or a menace, but just like any other dog (no insult to Zell here), she had a very fond liking for processed meat products. The cadet should have ate their Hotdog in the Cafeteria and not left it resting in plain view on the dividing ledge along the Library corridor. Hello, dogs and meat products went hand in hand like Squall and his gunblade; did these girls not know that?

"I'm so sorry!" Rinoa grabbed at Angelo's collar, clipping on the leash to prevent her from running off again. She had intended to take Angelo out of Garden for a walk along the coast, but decided to pop by the Library to return one of the books she had taken out. If she had known there was a Hotdog lurking near by, she would have put Angelo on a leash. Her favourite four-legged girl was obsessed with Hotdogs just as much as Zell, only Angelo was a lot more successful in scoring them as she currently demonstrated by ravening into the blonde cadet's snack.

"Is it yours?" a brunette cadet asked, looking at Rinoa as if she was crazy to touch Angelo.

"Yeah."

"Well don't you know pets aren't allowed in Garden?" the brunette cadet demanded, haughtily crossing her arms over her chest, demanding an answer.

"Angelo isn't a pet, she helps me in battle."

"That thing should be put down; it's out of control!" the blonde girl stated, looking at Angelo in disgust.

"She's not out of control, you left your Hotdog on the bench, and obviously she's going to go after it." Rinoa couldn't believe what she was hearing. How special were these Hotdogs that someone would wish for Angelo to be put down just for swiping one.

"She's a monster." The girl looked distastefully at both dog and owner, clearly holding a grudge.

"She's not a monster," Rinoa stated firmly.

"Does Headmaster Martine know you have that thing here?"

It, Monster, Thing! How many more demeaning words were these girls going to use? Angelo is a bloody dog. "Yes, he's fine with having Angelo here. She's just a dog and she's very friendly."

"She doesn't look friendly," the cadet remained stoic, looking Rinoa up and down in scrutiny.

She didn't have time for this, today was supposed to be a day for her and Angelo to spend some much needed time together. Angelo spent most days cooped up in her dorm room while she was working at the library; these girls weren't going to waste another minute of her time here.

"Look I'm sorry for your loss, here's ten gil for another Hotdog." Rinoa handed over the money and wrapped Angelo's leash around her hand twice to keep a solid hold on her "monster".

Walking away, Rinoa could still hear the girls sneering at her. All right, maybe she should have been kinder to them; Angelo did nearly knock the blonde one over. But they didn't need to be so horrible about her keeping a dog at Garden. It wasn't like _she_ ate their Hotdog. What was in those Hotdogs, anyway? Would Zell act so protective and haughty if he lost one to Angelo?

Trying not to give ear to what the girls were saying was harder than it should have been, but it wasn't until the mention of a certain commander that Rinoa found her pace slowing, her ears perking up and her heart pace increasing in anxiousness.

"Maybe if I start dating the Commander, I could get him to make allowances for me."

"Yeah, it seems that's all you need to do around here to get anywhere. No one earns anything any more; it just gets handed to them."

Rinoa pursed her lips, trying to calm herself and not turn around in an attempt to verbally put the girls in their place. Angelo staying in Garden didn't have anything to do with Squall; both Cid and Martine had been more than willing to let Angelo stay. And if that other comment had anything to do with Squall's promotion, well saving the world's butt from an evil sorceress pretty much warranted a promotion.

Shaking her head in disgust at the comments, she turned the corner out of sight from the girls but still within earshot. It was then that a comment caught her attention and she found herself stumbling in mid-stride. Holding onto the wall, she carefully listened to the girls continue their rant.

"Heh, and they told us Instructor Trepe lost her licence because of Seifer."

"I knew there was something going on between her and Squall. Her demotion was probably so they could keep fooling around."

"It was bound to happen, coming out of Squall's room late at night; I'm surprised the Garden Faculty never caught her. Then again, these elites always do stick together."

"That's just gross. I know she's only a year older than him, but c'mon she was his teacher."

"Yeah, well they've got it pretty good now. All alone up in that office."

"That's true. C'mon, let's get another Hotdog. Stupid bitch mauled my last one; someone should seriously put that thing down."

Rinoa hurried on her path before the girls could reach the spot where she stood. She wasn't afraid of them, she was from the streets of Deling City and spent a whole summer with Seifer and his posse; she could handle a few offhand comments.

But what they said about Quistis and Squall . . . was that true? She knew Quistis liked Squall, she stated she had some sort of love for him back in Trabia. But . . . were the late night trips to his room true?

Instead of walking down to the Garden gates, Rinoa slumped down next to the outer perimeter wall just before the steps leading outside, and sat on the cool stone ledge. Holding on to Angelo's leash, she ordered the dog to sit next to her to prevent her from running onto the road, not that any SeeD cars were coming their way.

That comment really bugged her. Did those girls know she was within earshot? Why would they make up something like that anyway? And even if they did, it was a pretty pathetic thing to say over a Hotdog. Seriously, what was in those Hotdogs?

Rinoa ran a hand through her hair, pushing the strays behind her ears. She didn't know what was bothering her to be honest. She knew Quistis had loved Squall at one point, sure they hadn't talked about it but she gathered the older girl got over it once Rinoa and Squall became a couple. But coming out of his room late night was news to her ears, did Squall and Quistis ever date?

Squall acted as if Rinoa was his first girlfriend, well either that or Rinoa was assuming she was. In all honesty, she couldn't ever imagine him befriending a girl; what with his reserved manner and blunt attitude, not a lot of girls could handle him. But she guessed maybe Quistis could, they had grown up together, spent most of their life together. The former Instructor was a Squall expert.

Her chest felt heavy and hollow as if some major ordeal was looming over her shoulders. It wasn't like it was a big deal even if they had been together. But why wouldn't Squall tell her about Quistis? If they ever shared anything intimate, why did they both act like nothing ever happened between them?

Shaking her head, she scolded herself for letting the girls get to her and subconsciously petted Angelo's fur in contemplation. Maybe those girls had noticed her stop behind that corner and decided to toy with her a bit longer. Those comments couldn't be true, Quistis and Squall didn't seem like the type to break rules . . . well Squall didn't seem like the type up until now.

And even if they were together, it would have been before he knew Rinoa, she had no right to get upset. . . .

Yeah, those girls were just playing with her mind. . . .

They were just bitter about the Hotdog. . . .

So why was it still bothering her?

* * *

><p>Squall wandered the small space in his office, moving aside folders and files quickly, and hurriedly putting away the spare pieces of papers that littered his desk. He had hoped he could catch Rinoa in time for dinner; maybe head back to his new apartment and just relax, anything to get away from his prison.<p>

Garden was his home and would always be; he was thankful for having a place to go after he left the orphanage, thankful for the position he was given and the status he had acquired working for the organisation. But at times he despised the place! The workload, the laidback attitude to duties, the fact that no matter how fast and effectively he tried to work, everything still piled up.

Looking at the masses of yellow and white paper scattered across his hidden oak desk he was contemplating a temporary ban on paper. It would kill two birds with one stone, save on trees and prevent him from having to read page after page of mission accounts and reports, not that Martine would agree to such childish suggestions. Then again, the amount of paper cuts he had succumbed to had surpassed the amount of times he had fought in battle. Maybe he could get one of the Trepies to keep account and add the record to his Battle Meter, it could aid towards his plea.

Hearing a knock at his office door, Squall called for the person to come in. Expecting it to be Martine with yet another meeting, report or the never-ending files that currently squatted in his office; he was pleasantly surprised to see Rinoa tread in.

He gave a small lopsided smile seeing her, but instantly faltered when he caught sight of her frown. Getting closer towards him, he sensed that something was bothering her and hoped it had nothing to do with their current situation. Being so consumed with Garden work, he hadn't had the time to sit and be a lending shoulder or a pillar of support for her. Her status as a sorceress did affect him, but he found it hard enough to be the comforting boyfriend let alone her Knight. If things could settle down a bit at Garden, he would hastily be by her side.

"Are you all right?" Squall didn't waste time in wanting to know what was bothering her. Another step in their relationship he found he wouldn't have taken months ago. He once believed that every person had to worry about their own problems, sort it out themselves and not burden it on others. Yet now, he felt pained to see her face miserable, hoping there was anything he could do to put a smile back on her face.

"I'm . . ." Rinoa paused in her speech, looking around at the room awkwardly and not making eye contact.

Squall put down the papers in his hand and walked over to her, holding her by the hand and using his other hand to lift up her chin. Though he was now in plain eye sight, she still refused to look directly at him. Instead, she pulled away from him and took a seat on one of the chairs opposite his desk and stared at the back of his desk while she fidgeted with the rings dangling from her neck.

Unknown to why she was acting bizarrely and uncharacteristically, Squall took the seat adjacent to her and anticipated to hear what was wrong. He didn't want to push her, but her demeanour was scaring him. It wasn't like Rinoa to withdraw or desist in touching him, as indecently narcissistic that sounded.

Rinoa sighed, looking up at the ceiling momentarily, as if praying for guidance before she looked at Squall's thighs and began speaking.

"I want to ask you something, and I want you to be completely honest in your answer. Can you do that?" she asked firmly, her sight remaining on the black leather of his pants unable to look directly at him.

Squall wasn't sure where this had come from; to say he was confused was an understatement. But hoping to rid Rinoa of whatever was bothering her, as well as deduce her reasons for acting so abnormally, he answered, "I can try, but if it has anything personal to do with Garden you know I can't."

"It's not about Garden." Rinoa lightly shook her head with indifference.

"Then of course." Squall bent his head trying to look into Rinoa's sullen eyes and get her to make contact. He watched as her lips parted and she took a huge breath of air.

"Were you and Quistis ever together?" She immediately looked directly at him; startling him with both her glare and question she caught him off-guard and Squall found himself recoiling back.

"Together?"

"As in a couple, an item . . . lovers." It pained her to say the last word but the gruelling ignorance was a burden to carry and she just had to know. No matter how deep-rooted the truth was, she had to accept it and be thankful for his honesty, anything than being beset by rumours or the suffocating weight that tormented her insides.

"No." It was easy for Squall to answer the question, though he was bewildered and interested to know where it came from.

"I asked you to be honest, Squall." Rinoa looked at him disappointedly and again Squall was taken aback. It seemed as if she had wanted him to affirm some type of connection with the Instructor, he couldn't comprehend her inexplicable reaction.

"Rinoa, I am being honest. Quistis and I have never been anything more than friends." Rinoa huffed and stood up, folding her arms in front of her angrily before turning around to glare at Squall again.

"Then why am I hearing rumours of her coming out of your room late at night?" Well that was exaggerating it a bit, it was only one rumour said by three unforgiving cadets.

Squall frowned briefly, a morsel of understanding granted him enough leeway to lean back in his chair and shake his head in utter disbelief. "What? That's absurd, Quistis has never come out of my room . . ." Squall faltered on his own answer, thinking to himself long and hard.

Rinoa gazed at Squall, perplexed at why he suddenly stopped speaking. She watched him in thought, wondering what was running through his mind that caused him to abruptly stop putting her heart and mind at ease. A minute had passed before his face cleared to one that was a mixture of insight and almost guilt.

"What?" Rinoa asked gravely.

"Ah . . . well, there was one time Quistis was in my room, but I didn't think anyone saw her."

Instantly Rinoa's heart thudded and the hollowness at her chest returned with gravity. So the cadets were telling the truth after all, Quistis had made a late night call to his room, it might not be for the reasons that she overheard, but she was there nonetheless. Unless Squall could explain the reasons for Quistis being in his private quarters, that heavy feeling in her gut would continue to reside.

But before she could even probe him, Squall's reassuring voice took precedence. "Look Rinoa, I don't know what you've heard, but there's nothing for you to worry about." Squall stood up, trying to get closer to Rinoa but she held her arm out in protest, her eyes scanning over his upper body.

"Why was she in your room then?"

"I can't say," Squall replied with difficulty.

"Why?" Rinoa asked, feeling hurt and dejected. She knew she didn't have any right to demand Squall to reveal everything about his past, but withholding something like this from her knowledge distressed her.

"Quistis asked me not to tell. Rinoa, I promise it's nothing bad."

"Then why can't you tell me?" she asked sadly, almost begging him with her eyes.

"I'm not at liberty to discuss Quistis's affairs." It was Rinoa's turn to be taken aback. Sure he was the Commander and soon to be Headmaster, but to be so curt in his answer she found to be demeaning.

She didn't mean to be aggressive or act irrationally, but she couldn't help but blurt out, "Well, what are you at liberty to discuss, Commander?" Placing her hands on the desk behind her she leaned back and scrutinized his cool expression which slighted on the disappointed side. "I'm asking you a simple question, and if it's nothing bad I don't see why you can't answer it."

"It's not that simple. It's Quistis's business to share, not mine."

"But it was enough to have her in your room late at night?" She didn't mean for her questions to be so controlling or argumentative. Honestly, she just wanted to hear and accept the truth, she didn't like this ignorance she had regarding Squall's previous life, but he was as usual being Squall - personification of difficult.

"Rinoa, it has nothing to do with you," Squall remarked matter-of-factly, his arms making their way to his sides like a disappointed teacher.

That had to be taken with a pinch of salt. Rinoa's demeanour changed, going from her nervousness and awkward stance to flaunting stubbornness and reservation. She glared at him with narrowed eyes and clicked her tongue.

"Fine." Getting off the desk, she glanced at him before continuing with, "I just wanted an honest relationship, but if there are going to be secrets between us, then I can see how much you trust me."

"Argh!" Squall couldn't help but let the grunt out, surprising Rinoa as she flinched from the sudden unexpected sound. It was long overdue, work was piling up and now Rinoa was making his life difficult. It didn't help matters that he was mentally avoiding talking about a father he just found out he actually had, and to top it off, it was a man who he'd much rather prefer as a moronic dream than a truthful reality. Why couldn't problematic issues just give him a freaking break?

"Rinoa, please don't do this."

"I'm not doing anything." Feigning innocence, Rinoa remained stubborn.

"You are, you're making out like I'm keeping something from you when I'm not. Trust me, if you knew why she was in my room you'd laugh. It isn't a serious issue." Squall tried to clarify, hoping to get the Sorceress off his back.

"Well if it isn't serious, then why can't you tell me? God Squall, I'm not going to get jealous, I know you and Quistis have history; she made it pretty clear in Trabia but I'm not going to get upset about something that took place before we even met." Rinoa grimaced in dissatisfaction and frustration, hoping her honesty would be a leeway for Squall to shed some clarity.

She looked at him intently, watching as his back stiffened as he started to tautly scratch his head. As if their bond wasn't strong enough she sensed there was something in her words that sparked his sudden nervous behaviour. She frowned at him as he mimicked her earlier demeanour and refused to make direct contact.

"What?" she asked when he didn't speak, fearing the worst again. "And be honest!" she quickly added, throwing in a steady finger in his direction for good measure.

Squall looked at Rinoa with displeasure and remorse. This would surely break her heart. "When she was in my room . . . it was actually after I met you."

Rinoa gulped down her shocked discontent - guess she didn't want the truth that badly after all. Standing with her back straight and hoping it wasn't as bad as it was sounding, she tried her utmost not to sound upset but rather wing it with understanding, "The night we met?"

Shaking his head sympathetically Squall elaborated, "I can't remember what night exactly, but it was after we landed at FH . . . when they returned from the Missile Base."

Hearing his words and looking into his eyes felt as if Rinoa's world was crumbling. It seemed a bit melodramatic, but thinking back to when this late night booty call occurred made all her actions to win him over look effortless and unwanted. Of course she was aware that Squall may not have liked her at first instance, he had sort of made that clear with his belittling remarks towards the Forest Owls back in Timber, but she was sure that after escaping the Prison there was something between them. It was on that vibe, and Selphie's meddling in FH, not to mention Irvine's very tactful and "tasteful" idea of planting a naughty magazine for their enjoyment (seriously, what did the Sharpshooter expect? That upon seeing the magazine they would throw their clothes towards the Dobes' house and give into their secret lusts?), that she had ventured to try and get to know him and show him who the real Rinoa was. But having Quistis in his room late at night without even a hint to why she was there just degraded her exertions.

She didn't want this to be true, she didn't like where her thoughts were leading her, no doubt they would wind up at the most negative self-loathing corner of her mind. But she had already heard him confirm the truth and then make it worse by defining a time.

Turning away from him, she hurried to the door, trying to stop herself from being mad at him, angry at herself, and stop her eyes from watering. The small voice of reason at the back of her head was scolding her for acting so childish. It tried to comfort her and remind her there was nothing going on between them. But the bigger voice, her hurt ego still questioned his integrity. If Quistis's visit truly was innocent, why didn't he tell her?

Squall quickly ran after Rinoa, managing to grip her arm as they both reached the door.

"Where are you going?" he asked incredulously.

"To my room."

"Rin–"

"Please Squall, I want to be alone." She tried prying her arm out of his grip, but the Commander held on tight.

"Rinoa, it's not what you're thinking!" He didn't mean to shout but all this crap really was getting to him. He didn't want to be mad at her, but she really did pick a shitty time to be upset over something which in the end would be ridiculously stupid to get distraught over.

"What am I thinking, Squall?" Rinoa rhetorically bellowed, fiercely staring into his blue eyes. "Am I thinking I was making a complete fool of myself chasing after you when you had someone else all along! Am I thinking I was stupid enough to believe there was something between us the night you comforted me during the parade in Deling City? Am I thinking that I was an idiot to lay my feelings out to you in FH when all along you were seeing Quistis?"

"I wasn't seeing her!" Squall argued back tiredly.

"Well unless you can come up with a good excuse for why Quistis was in your dorm room in the middle of the night, then I don't believe you!" Tugging her arm away from his grip, she barged out of the room and slammed the door behind her.

Squall closed his eyes, clenching the fist that had held her seconds ago, breathing in deep calm breaths in poor attempts to compose himself. He was trying very hard not to get agitated and curse everyone under the sun for adding more fuel to his already burning headache.

He truly did not need this right now. He didn't have the time to run around on pointless escapades, ones that would most probably have the same end result as helping out that darn cheapskate Shumi Elder.

There was absolutely nothing going on between him and Quistis. Rinoa had no reason to worry. He loved her and only her. But even so . . . sometimes she really pissed him off.

Grabbing his keys off his desk, Squall walked out of his office and made his way down the lift. Though he couldn't put a lid on the amount of work that was overloading his office, this was one problem that he wouldn't let get out of control. If he could do one thing in his power, it was to set the record straight.


	8. Clarification

**Author Notes:** This actually shouldn't be up. I had some free time and managed to get two chapters written (yay, go me), so thought why not update?**  
><strong>I'm going to give you guys a warning, this is a bit of a naughty chapter, hehe. I did tone it down with the jokes, a lot of it is just euphemism, nothing vulgar, well unless you've eaten a Hotdog today, then I apologise in advance.

I'm also waiting on my other beta to get chapter 11 of _Leather Black Dairy _back to me, so my AU readers should expect a chapter soon - hopefully today. (Yay, for double updates!)

Thanks for the reviews guys, I love receiving every one. I know this story isn't as popular as my other ones, but I'm really motivated when it comes to writing this so any reviews I get is greatly appreciated. :)

P.s. _random fact_, thanks for the note. I do agree 6 months is stretching it a tad too far, but I gotta start somewhere and November is closer to March and I sorta need to get to that time frame before a certain arc pops up. Remember, chapter 1 is a year from the night of the Ultimecia party. ;)

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 8 - Clarification <strong>

Rinoa paced her room, hands gripping the rings dangling down her neck, eyes piercing into the horrid grey carpet, and raucously breathing through her nose. Angry wasn't even an adjective to describe how she was feeling. In fact, she couldn't describe how mad she was at him, how ashamed she felt thinking back to her over-the-top, almost desperate attempts to win him over. She already felt embarrassed thinking about her lack of attire for the inauguration ball where she first met him, how on earth did she even think a short dress and high heels wouldn't make her look desperate. Then to top it off she had come out with one of the lamest pick-up lines she could think of. Well, in all fairness it did work, she did manage to drag him onto the dance floor, although keeping him there took just as much effort.

Shaking her head at the memory, Rinoa felt bitter regret. That whole time he was with _her._ If she had known he was already seeing someone she wouldn't have ventured to approach him, let alone try to get him to like her.

"Argh!" Rinoa groaned as the all too familiar memory of her words came back to her. Seriously, _'__You__'__re__ going __to __like __me?__' _It was no wonder he found her childish and immature. Of course she hadn't taken that much of a liking to him once she saw his outlook on life. Though through time and a very chivalrous trait that started to become increasingly apparent to her, especially during their escapades in Deling City, she had seen more of the person he hid underneath the cold façade. That was the person she respected, that was the young man she wanted to be liked by. Her efforts to win him over were part in thankfulness for his protection, but also because, undoubtedly, she had fallen for him.

But her memories were smeared with the image of Quistis and him. Though he stated nothing happened between them it still didn't explain why she was in his room to begin with. Had it been Garden related, than surely he would have stated as much and she would have respected the confidentiality of the matter. But it hadn't been a Garden matter; it was a personal matter that took place between them during his contract with her. She didn't want to be angry at him, but it was hard not to feel rejected, humiliated and disappointed that he had kept something of such nature from her.

Thinking back to the concert at FH, she recoiled at her words.

'_We love you . . . there I said it, please don't freak out!' _

Rinoa closed her eyes tightly, trying to burn the shamelessness that came with the memory. How was she so stupid to lay her feelings out like that, subtly bringing in the group's presence to ease her attempts into it, and she didn't even bother to enquire whether or not he was interested in anyone? Regardless of whether Quistis has made her visit at the time, she didn't even bother to find out if he even wanted her love.

Sitting down on her bed, Rinoa held the rings in her hand, looking down at them miserably. Everything was tainted, even the generosity of allowing her to keep the rings that she so stupidly and rashly decided to copy.

'_That'd be crazy, huh? I mean, everyone might, y'know, get the wrong idea about us.'_

'_You sound like you want everyone to get the wrong idea.'_

"Ouu!" Rinoa bent her head into her lap and mentally pounded herself. Why? Why did he have to go and ruin it? The entire time she had believed that he hadn't been interested in anyone, he hadn't been with anyone and in some inkling of his behaviour towards her, he did seem somewhat interested.

It was hard to digest - not the fact that he could have been with Quistis or any other girl, but that it had happened after she had entered the picture. She felt betrayed, her actions in hindsight were desperate and frivolous, and evermore he appeared to actually lead her on.

Of course in essence, none of that did matter. In the end, she was the one to receive his love, he thought the world of her and she knew that. But it still hurt. His SeeD-minded attitude made appearances every so often in their relationship and it was hard to not to be bothered by the lack of explanation and have everything be 'confidential' or 'not at liberty to discuss'.

Well if his SeeD priorities came first, then she'd have to find other ways to find out. Getting off her bed, Rinoa grabbed her key card and placed it into her jeans pocket. Angelo immediately stood up, skipping over to her owner in hopes of joining her.

"No girl, I need to do this on my own." Rinoa scratched Angelo's head and pushed her back. Carefully, she closed the door, took a deep breath and walked down the hall in the direction of the SeeD dorms.

There were two people involved in the midnight trip to Squall's dorm room. He wasn't at _liberty_ to discuss it. But hopefully, Quistis would be.

* * *

><p>By the time she had cornered the Faculty dorms, her resolve had somewhat dissipated. There was no reason for her to be mad at Quistis; in all fairness the Instructor had known Squall longer and technically, she did have first dibs. And although the commander and his sorceress were now finally a couple, Rinoa doubted she was entitled to demand answers about their midnight liaison. If there had been anything between the two SeeDs, it was at Quistis's discretion to disclose such information.<p>

Walking closer to Quistis's door, Rinoa hesitated in her stride, contemplating on the manner of approaching the subject with the Instructor. Asking Quistis directly if she and Squall 'had ever done it' was just juvenile and ridiculous . . . although that train of thought set her off and she stood there wondering if they ever had come as close to that. This would surely make her situation with Squall tenser, seeing as she personally couldn't offer him such physical comfort, yet there was someone who already had.

She had to stop thinking. This was not healthy, and standing idly in a deserted corridor was not going to aid her in understanding. If worse came to worse, she would have to accept that something may have happened between Squall and Quistis, something which Squall wasn't comfortable sharing. She would have to accept it, be mature about it and eventually, get over it. This was a step forward in her new life as a responsible adult . . . albeit a responsible adult who persisted in fatuous and hasty tactics to gain information. But the lack of knowledge was a burden to bear and all she wanted was to hear the truth, straight from the instructor's mouth.

Releasing a quick breath, Rinoa continued the short distance to Quistis's dorm and knocked lightly against the heavy wooden door. Bending her head down, she bit her lip and waited for the door to be opened. Each second that dragged on felt like a minute passing by; a minute in which she questioned her actions and truly asked herself whether she would be content with knowing the truth. A minute where she acknowledged she could turn back, show another responsible side and disregard any part of Squall's life that had nothing to do with her . . . a part of Squall's life in which she had no right to interfere.

However, before she could muse over the matter further, the door opened and a surprised Quistis stood facing her.

"Rinoa," the Instructor stated in surprise.

"Hey Quistis," Rinoa began, sliding past the blonde and walking straight into the small walkway before the lounge. "Sorry to barge in on you, but I really need–"

Halting in her spot, Rinoa focused on Quistis's leather brown armchair, particularly on the shaggy brown haired male who turned around to look at her in guilt-ridden anticipation. He stood slowly, hands fumbling with the legs of his pants as he stared at her frowned glare.

"Oh you've got to be kidding me," Rinoa muttered under her breath, loud enough for the Commander to hear.

"Rinoa, it's not what it looks like," Quistis jumped to defend the Commander, walking over to the sorceress and placing a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Squall told me what happened and just wanted my permission to clue you in on my late night visit."

Though she heard Quistis's words clearly, Rinoa couldn't pull her irritated stare away from her dear Knight. In light of their current situation, she couldn't bring herself to accept that yet again, her Knight and the Instructor were in a dorm in the middle of the night. In fairness, it had only just gone past 8 PM, but honestly, trying to dissuade any intimate thoughts the Sorceress was inclined to believe, wasn't being helped by finding him in her room.

Folding her arms, Rinoa finally pulled her eyes off Squall and gave Quistis a tired and displeased look.

"Squall," Quistis looked over at the Commander, baring a sympathetic smile, "I think Rinoa and I need to have a talk."

Squall wordlessly nodded his head, carefully making his way past the two girls, watching and waiting for Rinoa to say something. As he edged past her, he watched her head turn away, retracting back to earlier refusals to make eye contact with him.

She heard him sigh, turn the door handle and close the door firmly shut. Unfolding her arms, she uncomfortably looked around the room, suddenly feeling a stab of guilt for the way she had dismissed Squall completely. It was a trifling situation; in his absence she made all the excuses and reprimanded her intrusive investigations into his private and personal life. Yet when she was in his presence, she couldn't help but be mad at him for his lack of disclosure. She internally argued with herself in the space of a few seconds it took for Quistis to offer her a seat on the long cream sofa. Was she doing this for the right reasons? Would there ever be a right reason to delve into your boyfriend's private life, just to find out if something happened between him and an old friend? And exactly what would Squall think of her after this incident? Ultimately, if the situation had been reversed, she would have been outraged at his audacity to pry into her past.

"Rinoa?" Quistis called the Sorceress, pulling her out of her deep contemplation.

"I'm listening," Rinoa murmured, hoping Quistis would just come out with the truth, before she changed her mind out of guilt and left the apartment still ignorant and irritated.

"Okay, well . . . I think I should apologise first," Quistis announced, sparking a surprised look from Rinoa. "Trust me, this is all my fault, but not for the reasons you're probably thinking."

Smiling at the sorceress, Quistis turned to her and took a short breath. "Listen Rinoa, one thing you need to know in all this is that Squall loves you. It doesn't matter about what any other person feels for him – whether I'm talking about myself or someone else in this regard – _he _loves _you_."

Rinoa didn't know how to respond, this was not what she was expecting to hear. In fact, she had almost believed Quistis was about to apologise for a late night cherry-popping visit. Again, this was not healthy; the pressure of her own condition was slowly eating away at her, jealously and pessimism seeping into her mind. Unless she could push all these theories relating to her sorcery aside, there was no way she could overcome her insecurities surrounding Squall and sex.

Never in Rinoa's life had her mind been so consumed with the issue of sex as she had in the space of a couple of hours. And funnily (and coarsely) enough, it all started with a wiener. Rinoa bit her tongue to prevent the pitiful chuckle struggling to escape, chiding her weird and untimely sense of humour.

Taking Rinoa's silence as a sign to continue, Quistis carried on.

"To set your mind and heart at rest, absolutely nothing happened between myself and Squall that night or any other night. I mean, Squall did get lucky, but not in that regard," Quistis joshed, faltering in her smile when Rinoa cocked a half confused and half pained eyebrow.

"Sorry Quistis, but I don't think I can take double entendres right now." Rinoa grimaced, hoping not to come off as prudish, but honestly, Squall and sex were two issues Rinoa couldn't quite joke with others about just yet.

"No I'm sorry; I was just trying to lighten the mood." Quistis shook her head amusedly and tilted her head to one side, before opting to finally put the Sorceress's heart at ease. "Rinoa, are you aware of the secret Card Club Group in Balamb Garden?"

Frowning, Rinoa gently nodded in affirmation, "Erm, yeah I heard something about them from Selphie when she mentioned the Triple Triad World Cup."

"Triple Triad World Cup? Oh, that's the Card Queen."

"No-no, I know the difference. She was talking about her mission, but she also mentioned there was this secret Triple Triad group in Garden."

"Oh all right. Okay, so CC Group is made up of a number of dedicated, devoted and zealous Triple Triad players. They don't ever play openly, partly because they never challenge anyone, but rather opt to be challenged by the most enthusiastic and triumphant players."

"Erm . . . Okay, but what does this have to do with Squall?" Rinoa asked in utter confusion.

"A lot actually." Quistis giggled. "I guess it's fine to tell you the complete truth, but only on the condition you keep it to yourself and don't convey this to anyone - not even Selphie and the others."

"All right," Rinoa complied, curious about the severity of the truth.

"The CC Group is made up of technically eight people; there's CC Jack, Card Knight Club, Card Princess Diamond, Card Prince Spade, Card Magician Joker, Card Queen Heart – not to be confused with the actual Card Queen – and Card Master King." Quistis listed each name on her finger and let out a breath of air. "Diamond is made up of a pair of very dedicated and loyal female cadets.

"An opponent who is fortunate to play and defeat Jack, can move onto the next player until they finally reach the King and well, depending on whether or not they beat the King, they are anointed the Card Champion, or Card Master King if the previous King renounces his position. Of course, this has only ever taken place twice where the CC Group's King has been defeated," Quistis elaborated to a confused Rinoa.

"That's nice Quistis, but again, what does this have to do with Squall?"

Quistis laughed again and removed her spectacles. It was a tangent given the awkward situation, but Rinoa couldn't help but admire how beautiful the Instructor's sparkling blue eyes gleamed without her glasses. She couldn't help but despair at how beautiful Squall must have found her.

"Rinoa, the only two people to ever defeat the King was myself and Squall."

"Huh?" Rinoa grunted.

Scratching her head, Quistis lifted her feet onto the couch and faced the Sorceress directly. "Two years ago I played against the entire CC Group; I won against each opponent until I finally reached the Card Queen Heart - who ended being my good friend Xu. She told me to keep an eye out and when I least expect it, the King would show."

Rinoa nodded her head, her patience thinning under the burning desire to interrupt Quistis's side story and bluntly ask her exactly what she was doing in her boyfriend's room in the middle of the night.

"I remember keeping my eyes and ears on high alert, just waiting for the King to challenge me."

"I thought you said the CC Club don't challenge the opponents?" Rinoa asked, picking up what little information she had subconsciously listened to at the beginning of this rather long winded explanation and delay of the truth.

"They don't, only the King challenges the worthiest of opponents, no one other than the CC Group knows who the King is, and the King's identity is only revealed once he/she shows up when you least expect it. That's what happened to me, I was just studying in my room – it was the year I was training to become an Instructor – there was a knock on my door. When I opened it, it was Dr. Kadowaki standing outside; she walked in, closed the door and told me she was CC Group King."

"Oh, Dr. Kadowaki? But I've seen her play cards with Squall numerous times."

"Well she does now that she's no longer the King. The night I played against her, I defeated her. She retired and handed the title over to me," Quistis clarified, unable to keep the accomplished smug off her face. "Unfortunately for me, two years later when a certain brunet Commander beat Xu in the cockpit, I made a trip to his bedroom where he dethroned me."

"He did what to you!" Rinoa asked in shock, her mouth gaping open as her eyes stared in horror.

"Dethroned, Rinoa. You know, when you dethrone a King?"

"Oh." Rinoa's cheek flushed in embarrassment. Again, this was so unhealthy. There was definitely something in those Hotdogs, and once Squall's un-shady past was clarified, Rinoa vowed to find out just what.

Honestly all this over the issue of sex. Was it really that bad if Squall had 'dethroned' another girl? Her brain wanted to say no, but her heart couldn't comply. It wasn't just about wanting to be his first, but it was about never being able to be his last either. Without a clear ruling to their lack of intimacy, there was no way either of them would be able to 'dethrone' each other at any time.

"Anyway, I guess at the time I was hoping to carry on a tradition of having the King turn up at your dorm room when you least expect it. I just didn't think about the consequences or impression of being in a male cadet's room in the middle of the night. And he was my student – I guess that should have come to my mind first, given all the connotations about my whip," the Instructor remarked in mild jest and rolled her eyes.

Rinoa couldn't help but release an identical scoff; the Trepies sure did have some wild and hackneyed dreams.

"So . . . nothing happened between you and Squall?" Rinoa asked for confirmation.

"Well, other than playing around, getting lucky and dethroning me, nope nothing." The Instructor winked at the ashen faced sorceress, who rolled her eyes and smirked once her brain acknowledged the humour. "Nothing happened between me and Squall that night, or any other night. It was after he met you, so I doubt anything would have."

"Thanks Quistis," Rinoa repeated for the second time that night, relieved that her anxieties were gradually dissipating.

"Moving on. The reason I wanted to apologise was actually for the comment I made back in Trabia," Quistis remarked, showcasing her own nerves by nibbling on her thumbnail.

"Trabia?" Rinoa questioned, wondering if they both were thinking back to the same incident.

"Yeah. Rinoa, I'm quite upset that you've been hearing rumours about me – God knows I don't need it with the Trepies around, but I've always believed there's something positive that comes out of something negative. In this case, you hearing about these rumours led you here, and I think you and I really needed to have this talk."

Silently Rinoa nodded, reflecting on Quistis's words and agreeing with her analogy. Frankly, she had always wondered why Quistis chose Trabia, of all places, to reveal her childhood love for the Commander, after the entire FH concert where Rinoa was coerced by Selphie to get Squall to open up.

Sweeping a hand through her open hair, Quistis briefly looked down before licking her lips and eyeing the sorceress carefully.

"Believe me when I say this, we all think of you as family. You might not have been with us at the Orphanage, but over these months you've become like a sister to us." Quistis held on to Rinoa's hand, hoping the other girl would believe her sincerity. "I don't think there could have been anyone more perfect for Squall than you."

"Thanks Quistis," Rinoa softly whispered, pleased that the older girl was unintentionally putting her fears aside.

"I want you to know that what I said in Trabia had nothing to do with you or Squall directly, in fact . . . my ill-timed confession was aimed at Irvine."

"Irvine?" Rinoa repeated in baffled surprise.

"Rinoa, again I want you to remember what I said - we all think of you as family. But back then, we didn't know you that well, and Irvine knew you the least." Quistis paused in her speech, realising that she was jumping from one place to another instead of directly placing the puzzle pieces down for the rather confused Sorceress. "To start from a reasonable beginning: the day of the FH concert, when Selphie suggested you to be the one to get Squall to open up, I was a bit surprised. I mean, I knew from the night he danced with you there was something between you both, but after seeing the way you two fought before we arrived at G-Garden, I thought there was no longer anything there."

"You and I both," Rinoa remarked, remembering her utter displeasure of Squall's true character. He really had grown since then, become more humane and it pained her to acknowledge that she had emulated his character twice in the same night.

"Anyway, I guess I was a bit jealous. I don't think any of you caught on, but Irvine is very perceptive, it's natural for someone in his expertise. When you were getting ready, he came up to me and asked me if I was okay with you being the one to speak to Squall." Quistis carried on, pausing to see if Rinoa was keeping up with her pace. "I told him I was and asked why he was concerned and well, he said he could tell I was jealous.

"I want you to know that I wasn't envious of you, at least not in the sense where I disliked you. I guess I was a bit saddened that it took me years trying to get Squall to come out of his shell, and every time I was unsuccessful. It took you a couple of months and he's turned into someone completely different. But I guess that's fate for you, it was you - your being is what it took to get Squall to open up, I understand that now."

"Sorry Quistis, but I don't get what this has to do with Irvine?"

Quistis chuckled, closing her eyes tiredly and threw Rinoa a wide grin. "I'm being a bit vague, sorry it's been a long day for me. I guess my mind is haphazard and so I'm not being my usual articulate self."

"Sorry, I don't mean to be so impatient, I'm just really confused with this all. I mean, not the whole you and Squall thing, though I'm a little perplexed with why he couldn't just come out and tell me the truth."

Quistis bit her bottom lip, looking upwards and contemplating it in her head. "I guess it's because I told him not to mention it to anyone, if the Trepies found out I was the King, they'd be challenging me at every chance – I'd probably have to give up being a SeeD. I just never thought he'd keep something as insignificant as this from you, but . . . You know what, Rinoa?" Quistis asked with a contemplative smile.

"What?" Rinoa eyed the blonde, clueless as to why she was smiling so admiringly.

"Don't take this as a negative point in your relationship. Keeping my secret – as insignificant as it is – just goes to show how loyal Squall is."

Rinoa had to smile at that, relinquishing the disappointment and hostility she had felt for the Commander earlier and replacing it with pride and gratification. Now she really did feel like crap for overreacting and ignoring him. Once her conversation with Quistis was over, she promised herself that she would apologise and make it up to him somehow. Given the topic of Triple Triad, maybe she'd offer to play around with him and let him dethrone her a couple of times.

"Anyway, getting back to Irvine," Quistis piped up, bringing the sorceress back to the conversation. "A couple of times after the FH concert, he did pester me about the Squall issue. He kept telling me that if I kept my feelings hidden, I'd miss out on my chance.

"But I couldn't talk to Squall about it, for a very long time I believed it was wrong for me to like him, because I was his teacher," Quistis paused, breathing out a huff and pushing her hair back. "When we finally got to Trabia, I just thought it was the best time to indirectly educate Squall on my feelings, while at the same time get Irvine off my back. Here we all were, talking about our childhood and realising all our connections. So I mentioned my misunderstood love for him."

Rinoa stared intently at Quistis, her face expressionless, masking away her worried discomfort. "Was it misunderstood?"

Quistis stared back with the same determination, before blinking and eventually answering, "Honestly? No."

Rinoa almost thought she heard wrong, being taken slightly aback by Quistis's honesty. Seeing the unresponsive look on the Sorceress, Quistis quickly elaborated before the Sorceress could conjure up any insecure thoughts.

"Remember Rinoa, this was months ago and I still hadn't know you that well. I also didn't know what I felt for Squall. I thought it was love; I was being honest about that, just not about the sisterly love. I never tried replacing Ellone because I never wanted to be Squall's 'Sis'."

The Instructor knew the amount of honesty she was showcasing wasn't entirely comforting to Rinoa's emotions, but it was wholly necessary for them to clear the air and move on. If honesty was what it took to turn every stone and clear out every cobwebbed skeleton from her closet, she'd make sure to do it in one night.

"I did want Squall, more than as a friend. But I know now that it wouldn't have lasted. Some people are made for each other, I wasn't made for Squall, you were.

"But I had to get Irvine off my back, so I made up the part about misunderstood love and giving up when you entered the picture," Quistis mused, still depicting the images of the day.

"But you didn't," Rinoa whispered.

"Not entirely, but I mostly had. I guess I was just waiting around for Squall to announce he liked you or some sort of sign . . . I don't know exactly what, but I was waiting for you both to become official before I truly did give up. I just didn't know that the same night I made my announcement, would be the night I really did give up."

Rinoa tried her utmost to keep her concentration on the topic, it was intriguing and she had a desire to hear out the blonde. For a very long time she had been sceptical in regards to the Instructor's blessings for her and Squall, but she couldn't get Irvine out of her mind.

"Rinoa?"

"Hm?" Rinoa grunted, realising Quistis had caught onto her momentary lapse. "Oh sorry, I was listening. But I just have to ask, does Irvine disapprove of my relationship with Squall?" she asked, holding onto to her necklace forlornly. It wasn't like she needed their approval to be with Squall, but just the idea of one of her friends thinking the Sorceress and Knight were wrong for each other was disheartening.

"Oh no!" Quistis shook her head disagreeably. "Quite the opposite actually."

"Then why did he pester you to confess you feelings for Squall?" she asked in utter perplexity, it almost seemed like the Sharpshooter was stirring the pot.

"That's what I was going to tell you now. Irvine getting me to confess my feelings for Squall wasn't to hinder your advances, or to make Squall reciprocate my feelings. It was to make me aware of my feelings and how diminutive they were compared to yours," Quistis explained with a knowing smile.

"How?" Rinoa asked, again falling into utter confusion. That's all it seemed to be for that night.

Quistis huffed, still keeping her smile on her face. "After I told Squall how I felt, it was a refreshing feeling. I finally just got it off my chest and not in any pitiful way – I mean, telling him it was misunderstood prevented me from getting turned down. So when Squall didn't show any sign or reaction, I wasn't so hurt by it.

"That night when we returned back to Garden, Irvine dropped by my dorm room, and before you ask, no form of playing around or dethroning took place – Selphie would have both our heads," Quistis interjected with a wink, causing Rinoa to chuckle lightly, pleased that finally someone else's boyfriend was the subject of ridicule.

"I don't think Selphie would mind too much. She might of, if Irvine suggested a round-robin or three-way play," Rinoa mocked, causing the other girl to laugh hysterically.

"I'm glad we're finding humour amongst this very fragile topic. To continue my very long explanation: when he came over he actually revealed something to me, something I had a slight lack of knowledge about." Quistis once again shone a very bright smile at the Sorceress and took her hand into her palms. "He said some really long and detailed things about lone Sharpshooters and romance, honestly I wasn't completely mentally there, but then he mentioned something that took place between you both when you came back for us at the D-District Prison."

"Oh, when I kicked his ass and made him return?" Rinoa offered with a glint in her eye and an evil smirk.

"Yep, that very incident." Quistis grinned back. "Rinoa, he told me what you said. How you told him you couldn't give up on your friends and how you wouldn't give up on Squall after what he did for you in Deling City."

"Yeah well, at the time Squall only followed verbatim, and my contract with him didn't state anything about escaping from a prison. I thought if I didn't go back, you guys would be stuck there forever until Cid sent orders for you to leave."

"Well he also told me that you didn't care if you were put back in the cell with us, so long as you were with us right down to the very end. That you wouldn't sacrifice your friends for your own freedom."

"It was nothing," Rinoa dismissed shyly.

Quistis held Rinoa's hand tighter. "No Rinoa, it was something. When you confessed how scared you were back in Trabia I couldn't understand why. I admire you so much for coming back for us, Rinoa. Trust me, some SeeDs wouldn't even do that. I've seen cadets during SeeD practise exams that wouldn't bother to return for their comrades in fear of competition. But you did."

"You guys are my family," Rinoa stated as if it obvious. "Irvine was there when Squall saved me from those Iguions, so he understood when I had to return the favour."

"And that is when I realised that you were one of us, and that you loved us all, and more importantly, you loved Squall more than I ever could. Irvine showed me that, he allowed me to get my feelings out before I could accept yours."

The two girls smiled and nodded at each other, grateful for the conversation and clarity that was shed on the matter. God knew it was needed for them to continue on with their lives. It wasn't a substantial aspect of their life, slightly trivial given that Rinoa and Squall were already a couple and Quistis had gotten over it long ago. But this was a small amount of dust that was finally removed from under their generically designed, boot-trodden carpet or whatever cliché analogy.

For Quistis it was a way to finally get the whole affair off her chest, make Rinoa aware that she truly did believe in her relationship with Squall, and for herself, pave a way forward for her to meet someone else - someone _she_ was made for.

And while Quistis couldn't recognise just how important and timely her endeavours were, Rinoa felt great relief and closure knowing there were people who believed her feelings for Squall wouldn't be damned, that her insecurities and anxieties were minuscule, and that there was a lot more greater meaning to her relationship with Squall than just the title of their bond that supposedly bound them together.

Getting off the cream* sofa, Rinoa smiled at the Instructor and patted down her jeans. "Thanks Quistis, for everything. You've really opened my eyes to a lot things I was doubtful about."

"No problem. And just so we're clear, my title as CC Group King will still be kept a secret?"

"Of course," Rinoa obliged, lightly chuckling to herself. "Although, I think for his efforts, Irvine should be allowed one game."

"Maybe. If I do go ahead with it, I won't make the same mistake of showing up in my uniform, whip in tail. I can just imagine him making a comment about how seductive overpowering women are." The Instructor laughed, rolling her eyes as she followed Rinoa to the door.

Once Rinoa stood in the quiet corridor, noticing a couple of cadets making their way to the dorms before curfew, she turned to Quistis and gave her another heartfelt smile.

"Are you going to talk to Squall?" Quistis asked, her arms folded over her chest as she leaned on the threshold of the door. Seeing the Instructor in her present demeanour sparked an image of Dr Chambers in Rinoa's mind, and thus the voice of the therapist came reverberating in her ears.

"Yeah, I think Squall and I have things to discuss," Rinoa answered, smiling to convey her optimism. "I'll see you in the morning."

"Sure, hope it goes well."

Rinoa nodded in Quistis direction, before walking down the now secluded corridor, only a couple of doors down to Squall's dorm room. It was getting quite late now and only a couple of minutes before curfew, there was no way they'd be able to discuss everything in that time. But she had to persist, talking about things was hard, especially when loved ones and feelings were involved, she had to resolve to speak about it when her confidence was at its peak.

Knocking on Squall's door lightly, Rinoa took a shaky breath of air, willing her sickness to lessen down, and closed her eyes.


	9. Lesson

**Author Commentary:** I wanted to get this posted yesterday, but for some weird reason I couldn't log in. Oh well.  
>I want to say that I'm not a very big science-y person, and I'm not really into sci-fi. But I have used some sci-fi elements in this chapter, so if there are any physicists reading this, it may be cringe worthy. ~_^<br>The next chapter should close off this arc and then the chapter after that should get that ball rolling speedily along.

Extra thanks and appreciation to my beta **Jebus Creiss** for the inspiration of this chapter and general all round hard work.

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><p><strong>Chapter 9 – Lesson<strong>

A breath of harsh air shot out of his lungs as Squall dropped his head backwards to rest against the headboard. Exactly a month into their relationship and already they had their first spat. In one sense it was better than their domestics back when he was officially under her contract. At present their arguments didn't involve snide comments, childish name-calling ('meany' wasn't exactly such a big deal to those who had heard far worse – chicken-wuss not included), and overused crossing of the arms. However, the fact that they had had an argument was disheartening. Squall wanted his relationship with Rinoa to be perfect, for everything to fall into place and work out. Sure there were some things out of their hands; like having sorcery abilities and never knowing exactly how much love to have for one another. But this scenario was entirely different; they had paved a way for this argument.

Turning to his side, Squall recollected the scene in his office. Rinoa was definitely hurt and disappointed. And all over what? An secret that Quistis had taken two seconds to decide she didn't mind Rinoa knowing. Of course the decision had come about after he had told her what happened between them. But nevertheless, Quistis's wisdom had always surpassed his own. All it took was one look at the Instructor's fretful expression and he knew refusing to tell Rinoa had been a step in the wrong direction.

Shaking his head and sighing at the dreadful feeling in the pit of his stomach, he couldn't believe he had let a futile squabble taint what was a perfect beginning to their relationship. However, that thought in itself caused another to cross his mind. Was this it? Was this the end? Surely Rinoa would believe he distrusted her, withheld things from her knowledge. Would she bother with a relationship of this kind?

Closing his eyes, Squall cursed himself, wishing the ever-unthinkable: if only he could compress time. He had a lot to learn about this whole relationship thing; unable to decipher between what to tell one's girlfriend and what to keep to oneself, he was surely screwed.

Suddenly aware of his surroundings Squall looked at exactly what he was doing; laying atop his bed, tossing and turning, willing himself not to think. It was déjà vu. He immediately sat up and placed a hand underneath his chin. Regardless of how hard he tried, he couldn't shake himself out of the shell he had built all these years. Though he had let Rinoa creep in through the cracks, he still found himself alone, still found himself making errors that pushed people away. He couldn't let this happen; he couldn't allow something insignificant to be the cause of losing yet another person in his life.

A light rap on his door caused Squall to jolt off his bed and out of his bedroom, briskly walking past the lounge until he reached his door. Peering into the peephole, he could make out a distorted image of Rinoa behind the door, arms behind her back as she stared at the ground with closed eyes.

Squall didn't waste any time opening the door, holding it open far wider than Rinoa needed to step in.

"Hi," Rinoa whispered softly, awkwardly shifting in her position.

"Hey," Squall replied.

They both stood watching each other, neither saying a further word. Rinoa's downcast eyes drifted over his collar before Squall's voice called her back up to his eyes.

"Do you want to come in?" Well it was pretty obvious she did, she hadn't mentioned anything about him stepping outside to join her, and unless she had a box of cookies hiding behind her, there were no indication she came for any other reason.

"Yes please." Yet her formality was foreign to his ears. On any normal day, Rinoa would waltz into his apartment unannounced (and uninvited), pester him into a conversation and somewhere down the line, he'd wind up hanging out with her. Now seeing her waiting to be invited in, heightened his fears of them stepping into uncomfortable territory.

Putting his insecurities on hold and stepping aside, Squall allowed Rinoa to walk in before shutting the door. Since she wasn't making any moves to lead the conversation on, Squall led the way to his purple comforter-covered sofa and took a seat, waiting for Rinoa to do the same. Once she did, albeit a bit hesitatingly as she placed herself on the edge of his sofa, they both looked at one another and he bravely stated, "I'm sorry."

"What?" Rinoa asked in surprise.

"I'm sorry Rin, I should have told you. It was such a stupid thing to keep from you; I swear I won't keep anything from you again. Please just give me another chance, I'm sorry about all of this–"

"Whoa! Squall, calm down." Rinoa tried hiding a smile as she scooted closer to the Commander and placed a hand on his thigh. "For someone who doesn't talk much you just ran a speech marathon. What's all this about chances and keeping things from me?"

"I don't want us to break up," Squall solemnly replied.

The Sorceress grinned, her upper teeth biting down on her bottom lip. "Squall, why would we be breaking up?"

"Couples normally do that when they have an argument."

"Yeah, some normal couples do that, but then again, we're anything but normal. Besides, this is hardly something to break up over." She moved the hand that was resting on his thigh and placed it on his cheek, widening her smile while watching as Squall's head sunk into her touch. "Squall, you have nothing to apologise for. In fact, I should be the one apologising."

Squall creased his forehead while Rinoa took that opportunity to get comfortable on his couch, crossing her legs underneath her and began talking again.

"I should apologise for invading your privacy. I let my jealousy get the better of me and I sacrificed your private life for my personal gain – for that I'm sorry."

"It's okay."

"It's not okay. What I did was out of order; if the roles had been reversed I would have been so pissed at you for invading my privacy, especially if it was something that took place before we became a couple." Rinoa shook her head disapprovingly.

"I . . . I guess I do understand why you did it though," Squall remarked.

"You do?"

"Yeah. Sometimes there are things that have taken place in another person's life – a person you love – and the ignorance is too tempting not to find out. For you it was the vagueness of my relationship with Quistis . . . and for me, it's the vagueness surrounding you . . . and Seifer," Squall explained, his eyes roaming around her face, showcasing the same level of hesitancy as his lagged speech.

"Oh, I guess I never thought about that." Rinoa paused, fiddling with her necklace again before looking at Squall directly in the eyes. "Squall, I promise I'll tell you about Seifer – not everything though, there's a lot of things that have taken place in my life that I'm not so comfortable sharing. I mean, it's nothing scandalous or anything, but just at this moment I don't think it would be the best, nor is it relevant. But whatever you want to know – I'll tell you."

"Okay, and in return if there's anything Quistis didn't mention, I'll tell you. I don't care about promises I've made to others, your promise means more to me." The Commander took hold of Rinoa's hand, tightening his grip, only to have Rinoa slip her hand right out.

"No Squall!" Rinoa cried a bit too high pitched, surprising Squall as his eyes widened in shock. "Please don't do that. If there is one thing I learnt that is more precious to me than knowing nothing happened between you and Quistis, it's knowing that you're loyal to your friends and that you're a trustworthy person. Please don't diminish that trait."

For the third time that night Squall was taken aback. He really had thought he was completely in the wrong and paved a way for disaster, never did he imagine Rinoa would feel remorseful for _her_ actions. Nevertheless, he nodded his head and listened to her continue.

"Honestly, at the time I couldn't put my finger on why I was so bothered by that rumour, why I even believed it."

"Why did you?" Squall couldn't help but ask, wondering exactly what part of this so called rumour had led to Rinoa believing it over his word.

"Well, I guess when it boiled down to it; I wondered whether you'd be capable of breaking Garden rules. And given that you've been bunking at my dorm for a couple of nights, it wasn't such a hard thing to believe," Rinoa confessed, her thin smile compensatory for her harsh honesty. She didn't want to tarnish the image she had of him, but the truth was out there and sometimes it was a hard reality to face. "I think spending time in my dorm past curfew, being able to break that rule made me wonder what other rules you could have broken. Otherwise I didn't have any inclination to believe that rumour."

"Really?" Squall asked, squinting at his girlfriend with humoured interest.

Rinoa didn't quite pick up on his facial features and nodded her head. "Yeah, you're always by the book Squall, hell that's why I came back for you at the D-District prison – I thought you wouldn't leave that hole until Cid personally sent you an order to escape."

Squall softly scoffed, rolling his eyes in amusement. "That's what you think of me? That I'm a literal by-the-book person?"

The Sorceress nodded again, "Up until recently. That's why I think you shouldn't come over anymore. At night at least." She put her head in her heads, crouching forward and let out a huff. "I'm sorry, Squall. I don't want to be mean . . . We've both changed a lot over the past months, you especially. I don't want to be in another situation where I'm conflicted with knowing what you're truly capable of."

Taking a short breath of air, Squall turned to face his girlfriend with a knowing smile, before opting to clarify her on a couple of matters.

"Rinoa, what if I were to tell you that I wasn't always by-the-book?"

"Then I'd ask if there have been any other female cadets in your room," Rinoa retorted.

"Ha-ha. I'm being serious."

"So am I."

Squall folded his arms over his chest, cocking an eyebrow as if testing Rinoa's sincerity. Rinoa rolled her eyes and thought about it in her head, however, before she could conjure up a reaction, the Commander carried on.

"Rinoa, have you ever heard about the Nuremberg Trials?" Squall asked suddenly, causing the Sorceress to frown.

"Erm, I think I've heard something about that before. I'm not entirely sure."

Squall sprung off the sofa and walked to the book shelf beside the small T.V stand. Picking up a notepad and pencil, he made his way back to the sofa and sat down. Flipping to a clean page, Squall sketched a small map of a continent Rinoa couldn't entirely make out.

"This is a map of Esthar, well that used to be Esthar fourteen years ago." Rinoa nodded her head, realising why she didn't recognise the drawing. "This spot here is what we know as Tears' Point, but a little over twenty years ago it was a small town called Nuremberg.

"When Sorceress Adel reigned over Esthar she had taken control over Odine's lab. I'm sure you know Odine carried out various scientific tests and research on her behalf, one of them happened to be emulating Sis's powers and thus he created the Junction Machine Ellone."

"Yeah, the guy mentioned something like that back when he invented some brand with my own name. If he ever sells it, remind me to ask for a royalty," Rinoa remarked.

"Will do," Squall noted before carrying on. "Anyway, Odine, by the orders of Adel, was building the Lunatic Pandora – you remember what that is, right?"

Rinoa rolled her eyes. "Oh the memories of being junctioned to an evil Sorceress, how could I forget that?" she replied in monotone.

"Of course! Something as fun at that?"

"Meany!"

"I'm just joking," Squall dismissed with his hand. "Anyway, I was saying: in order for Lunatic Pandora to work, they needed to synchronise it with the moon. The only problem they had was that they needed two opposing magnetic fields to charge energy through the Lunatic Pandora and awaken the Lunar Cry," Squall explained, delicately sketching an almost perfect replica of the huge model. The lines were precise, the shading very delicate, even Esthar's crescent emblem was exact. Rinoa couldn't help but admire the irony of such lethal hands being able to produce such fine art.

"Unfortunately for Adel, they couldn't use the old Esthar Airstation's to power it. It wasn't until Odine found out about the naturally high electromagnetic build-up at Tears' Point – back then known as Nuremberg, that–"

"Whoa-whoa-whoa. Slow down, Leonhart. I'm a high school drop-out, so dumb it down a little, will ya?" Rinoa teased. Squall immediately flushed red, only just realising the reality of Rinoa's education. It hadn't occurred to him before that for a seventeen year old to be part of a resistance faction, where on earth was the time for school?

"Sorry, erm, what don't you understand?" he asked, hoping not to sound arrogant.

"Electromagnet, or something."

"Electromagnetic, or electromagnetism is a source of energy, magnetism, that is produced by electric currents. This planet has a soft iron inner core surrounded by semi-liquid materials of the outer core that move in continuous currents around the inner core. So, when the planet's magnetic field extends from the inner core to a stream of energetic particles emanating from the sun – the solar wind – that is called the magnetic field."

"Okay, I think I got that." Rinoa nodded slowly, processing each piece of information in her head.

"That's known as the dynamo theory. There was another theory, again by Odine - no surprise, and that is the lunar wind. A stream of energetic particles _reflected_ from the sun's light emanating–"

"From the moon?" Rinoa interrupted.

"Correct," Squall answered, smiling as Rinoa grinned back.

"I'm not _that_ dumb." Rinoa winked.

"Oh, I didn't think you were– I mean I don't think you are."

"Relax, Squall, I didn't think you did." The Sorceress squeezed her Knight's hand as he continued smiling at her and carried on with his lesson.

"Well, Odine had this theory that he could get the planet to temporarily change its electromagnetic field, and instead of generating electric current directly from the solar winds, he would connect it with the moon. The lunar wind and the planet's magnetic field combined together would start the Lunar Cry," Squall explained, taking a short breath of air.

"Wow, Squall you learn this all in class?" Rinoa asked in awe.

"Erm, no actually, some of this was my own research." The Commander looked down at his paper, taking a deep breath and scratched the back of his head. "Erm, yeah so I was saying. In order for it to work, he had to find the best spot where the Lunatic Pandora could be positioned and have two sources of energy target it at the same time. That spot happened to be Tears' Point. So he told Adel and she went about sending a squad of Estharian Army to take over the town."

"Wait, _what_!" Rinoa's jaw dropped. "What kind of idiot thinks it's a good idea to make a Lunar Cry happen in their own country?"

"Erm, this _is_ Odine and Adel I'm talking about here. Neither of them would care. Odine because it's in the name of science and Adel, well she really didn't give a toss about anyone else."

Rinoa blinked. "Good point, I guess . . ." She quickly shook her head to gather herself.

Squall briefly found himself puzzled with her apparent equanimity on the subject. Why did he have the nagging sense that she should have acted differently to such a revelation?

"Were . . . were there people living there?" Rinoa asked.

"Yes, unfortunately there were. It wasn't a big town, a lot of it was just land mass and those that lived there were evicted. Sadly, not everyone was keen on leaving and a good two thousand stayed back in what history declares it as 'occupied' Nuremberg."

"Wow, two thousand is a lot of people," Rinoa commented.

"Not compared to the one point seven million people living in Esthar. And not compared to the squadron of a thousand Army men with guns and paramagic, not to mention Monsters, sent to nuke the entire place."

"They didn't!" Rinoa cried in disbelief, her face contorted to a frown.

"I'm afraid they did." Squall muttered quietly.

Rinoa's eyes strayed away down to her lap, appalled at the news, wondering how on earth such a thing could take place.

Squall observed his girlfriend, reflecting on her innocence and the contrast to his own reaction. When he had learnt the basics of the story in class, he had dismissed it as a historical event, a sad thing for the people who has suffered, but a lesson for the greater public. But here was Rinoa, someone who was not learning this as a class topic, nor learning for the reasons he was about to enlighten her on, but still she reacted in disheartened agony. It made the Commander realise just how much of a sheltered life she'd had.

"All those people . . ." Rinoa whispered.

Not knowing how to respond, Squall carried on with his story. "They cleared the . . . bodies and erm, went about building the structure for where the Lunatic Pandora was to settle. It was designed to draw its power from the Crystal Pillar inside the Lunatic Pandora." He started drawing around the Lunatic Pandora, sketching zig-zagged lines of electric currents from a crystal source inside. Again, Rinoa took great interest in Squall's artistic ability, admiring the way he lightly shaded in the huge currents and emphasised on the dimensions. She wondered if his artistic talents were natural or whether he'd taken up any art classes.

"They say the first attempt at a Lunar Cry was triggered in Centra, but others say the Estharians triggered one in Trabia, near the canyons. Either way, this was some serious business. So by the time they were doing that, word had already reached other continents, and soon Galbadia was ready to knock on Esthar's doorstep and accuse them of world domination, stating the obvious, but that's Galbadians for you."

"Hey, I resent that," Rinoa cried, folding her arms in front of her.

"Oh, sorry. I didn't mean you. It's just that, this entire thing took place and Galbadia had plenty of opportunity to interfere, but they wait until Adel is ready to launch the Lunatic Pandora. Anyway, long story short, she didn't get another chance to. Laguna had arrived by that time; Odine had already grown bored of the Lunatic Pandora and was too busy running tests on Ellone."

"Oh, how horrible." Rinoa frowned, placing her hand on Squall's thigh again.

"Yeah, but Laguna was there to save her," he replied, unsure of his feelings now knowing who Laguna sacrificed to save Ellone. It wasn't like he didn't want Ellone to be saved, he was grateful Laguna had gone after her, but he couldn't quite place where his present feelings were.

"So, what does this all have to do with our situation? Don't get me wrong, it's interesting, and I can clearly see my steadfastness on improving your tour-guide abilities has turned you into a right old teacher."

"Funny," Squall mocked teasingly. "What I was trying to get at is the Nuremberg Trials. After Laguna shot Adel into space, the Estharians made him President and they formed a cabinet. A lot of people started demanding answers and justice to the torture they faced. The Estharian Army were also under heavy scrutiny.

"They were taken to court for their actions, a number of the men who had participated in the Nuremberg attack had pleaded with 'Superior Orders', meaning that a soldier could not be held accountable for his actions due to it being a command of his superior. They were only following Adel's orders as she was their current leader."

"That doesn't make it right. They have a mind of their own, they should know what's ethical and moral," Rinoa argued.

"I agree. I know we had our own little debate about that a while ago," Squall quipped, as Rinoa straightened her back recognising her blunder, "but I do agree that this was by far inexcusable. So naturally the court found them guilty."

"Good."

"All participants guilty except one; Professor Odine. I did find it quite bizarre that he was never charged with conspiracy let alone aiding and abetting. When I did my research and found out all this information, it all made sense. Esthar still needed him for their research, locking him behind bars would be a disadvantage and a loss to them."

"So they let him walk free?" Rinoa asked, astounded by what she was hearing.

"Not free. He was, and probably still is, paying his punishment by improving Esthar's technology. But yeah, that's why Odine was never charged with anything; he got off with Superior Orders," Squall concluded, lethargically tossing the sketch pad onto his coffee table, as Rinoa shook her head.

They both remained seated next to each other, the sound of their breathing could only be heard as they contemplated on the present discussion. Although only a few hours ago there was somewhat mild animosity in the air, being in the presence of one another made them both feel at ease.

Rinoa eventually broke the silence, still puzzled by the direction of their conversation and opted to ask, "So, why did you look into this?"

"Oh right. About a week ago, I was just going through some files, I was supposed to be working on this mission Quistis and I have been working together. I stumbled upon a folder which held the details of the last academic year's SeeD reports, among them was my own. When I was reading through it, there was quite a lot of references to Superior Orders and how my actions during my SeeD exam couldn't be held accountable given my circumstances."

"Which were?" Rinoa asked, giving Squall a shrug.

"Uhm, it's a long story."

"If it's as interesting as the one you just told me, I'm willing to hear it out." Rinoa offered with a kind smile, tucking her knees into her chest and wrapping her arms around them. She waited for him to continue.

Squall rhythmically tapped his fingers across the headrest of the sofa, watching Rinoa carefully with an air of appreciation. If the roles were reversed, he would have leapt at the chance not to hear someone drone on about their life. But he was happy Rinoa was different and took interest in his life – personal and work related.

"Okay, on the day of the SeeD exam, I was sent to Dollet in a squad with Zell and Seifer," Squall confessed, observing the way Rinoa's eyes lit up in surprise.

"Seifer? You never told me that." Her question came out as more of a demand.

"I didn't think it was necessary at the time, and I'll tell you my reasons now." Squall excused himself before continuing, "Seifer was the squad leader, and naturally, he didn't listen to our suggestions. We were supposed be on duty in the Town Square, not going beyond the Dollet Hotel. Seifer, however, wanted to kick some Galbadian butt and as the leader, persuaded us to head on over to the communication tower and see what the Galbadians were up to."

"And you went?"

Squall blinked, his face expressionless as he assumed Rinoa was disappointed to hear the truth. Yes, he had defied orders, went against official orders and went along with his rogue squad leader. So much for her image of him mechanically going by the book – how could she not be disappointed?

"Yeah, I did. Zell didn't want to go, but he didn't want to be left behind either, so the three of us went ahead and checked out the communications tower. By the time SeeD had to clear out, our squad couldn't be found and it was Selphie in fact, who came with the message to return to base immediately."

The Commander kept his gaze on the Sorceress; her own sight had fallen to her lap, her forehead creased into concentration. He didn't know what she was thinking, he wanted to ask her, but felt it better to continue.

Taking another shaky breath of air, he wiped a hand over his hair and stretched his back.

"So, we headed back, but the Galbadian army sent this huge machine after us, which we fought but the thing kept recharging itself and it wasn't until we got to the beach that Quistis was able to put the thing down," Squall said as Rinoa continued to look at her lap.

There was a short silence between them as Squall wondered if she had been listening, until her voice softly attested she had been. "I'm listening."

"When we got back to Garden, Zell and I were made SeeDs but Seifer wasn't. Cid did speak to him before the results were announced, so when he didn't react badly to the news, I thought it was because he already knew before us. But it still didn't make sense to me; why was I accepted as a SeeD when I defied direct orders?"

"The Superior Orders," Rinoa whispered knowingly, finally looking back at Squall.

"Correct. Although, the truth is, Cid needed any excuse to make me a SeeD since he and Edea already knew that I would be the one to defeat Ultimecia. So when I applied for the SeeD exam, they had to find a way to pass me. When Cid wrote that report, I think he used the Superior Orders excuse on NORG since, at the time, he and the Garden Faculty would have failed both me and Zell along with Seifer."

"That . . . does seem fair. I mean, based on the comparison to Adel and the Estharian Army, rules are rules and you guys broke them," Rinoa elaborated.

"I know, it's why I was always doubtful of my position as a SeeD. And no offence to you, but when Cid assigned us your contract, I thought it was penance for the exam."

"Hey! We weren't that bad." Rinoa scrunched her face in hurt, unfolding her legs and placing her hands on her hips.

"Sure, plopping on the floor to discuss strategy is what's freeing Timber."

"You're such a meany!" Rinoa pouted.

"You love it," Squall softly laughed before continuing, "But seriously, I always doubted why I was made SeeD let alone Commander. It didn't make sense why they would chose someone who had just passed their SeeD exam to take on such a huge responsibility. It wasn't until I went to meet the past Edea that it all came together. So naturally when I found that file, I realised how Cid got the Faculty to pass my exam."

Neither said anything for a while, both contemplating on the matter, but specifically on different aspects. While Squall was thinking back to what started this entire exchange, Rinoa was thinking of Seifer, more specifically, the night of the inauguration ball.

"Rinoa," Squall called out to the girl as she turned to face him with anticipation. "The point of this history lesson? I do break rules, sometimes small ones that seem insignificant, like spending the night with you. And sometimes serious ones that end up getting an entire faction of SeeD to strategise a plan D to get my butt safely out of harm's way and back in Garden."

Rinoa nodded, though her face remained unchanged; contemplative and forlorn. He wanted to ask her what was wrong, but the fear of her now recognising that he wasn't the perfect SeeD others made him out to be, and thus realising she could do better, tugged at his heart. He didn't want this to be over, as much as telling her the truth was important, he didn't want this disclosure to be the reason for losing her.

"I . . . I don't get why you did it, why you defied the orders . . . but I understand. You don't just follow orders do you?" Rinoa asked.

"No. I try to, but I'm only human, sometimes my own interests take precedence and I find myself in situations I shouldn't be in."

"And do you ever regret these decisions?" she asked, looking hopeful.

"Honestly? No, I don't. If I hadn't made that decision, sure I still would have made SeeD, but maybe Seifer would have gone without us and not made it out alive. We did fight some pretty nasty monsters," Squall confided, eyes widening in seriousness.

"Then you . . . also didn't regret defying Esthar's orders and coming back for me?"

"That is a decision I'll never regret." Taking her hand, Squall brought it to his lips and kissed her knuckles. He held it against his cheek tenderly for a moment, closing his eyes until he felt her lips on his other cheek.

"Thank you, Squall." He heard her whisper in his ears, the small hairs on his neck rising in excitement.

As he opened his eyes, he expected her to smile at him, but instead was surprised and worried to find her looking bothered.

"What is it?" he asked.

Rinoa sighed, pressing her lips together and gave him a brave smile. "I guess it's my turn. I can't tell you everything just now, but I'll tell you what you need to know about me and Seifer."

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><p><strong>Author's End Note:<strong> Nuremberg is actually a city in Germany and after WWII, the soldiers that were involved in war crimes were brought to trial. Many of these soldiers pleaded under Superior Orders, but were unsuccessful. Of course, there were some that were acquitted, amongst them were doctors that specialise in aviation medicine - for some reason that reminded me of Dr. Odine - though I am fully aware he is a scientist. But, Lunatic Pandora, curative paramagic and blatant European accent - how could I resist? :)


	10. History

**Author Notes: **Again, my sincerest apologies for the massive delay to this fic. I have explained why on my profile.

A couple of announcements:  
>Ashbear is holding a Squall and Rinoa challenge in August and is recruiting writers and artists to take part. Please check my profile for more details and try and get involved.<p>

There is an Image Manager feature on FFnet now which allows us to use pics for book covers. I'd like to utilise this for my stories, so anyone with some original pics, let me know.

Lastly, I'm having some small issues with this story. Every story I've ever written has been an idea which I feel was original. The content and storyline itself is always my own and I would never dare plagiarise anyone. Even with the titles, I feel they're unique in their own way, not really something you come across everyday. So far, I've managed to pull off pretty original ones ... except this one.  
>'Horns of a dilemma' is another phrase for 'Between the rock and the hard place', meaning picking between two very hard decisions, and that is what my fic is about. But I just feel quite disconnected from this fic as soon as I read the title. It's not like Breaking Through Appearances or Friendship Isn't Enough, nor is it like Petal Among Lies which are all my own creations. And that is no way a shameless plug to read my other fics :D<p>

In case you didn't know, this fic isn't actually going to be action packed nor will there be a massive climax to the ending. So while I did title this to be that way, the more I write this story, the more light-hearted it gets. And honestly, I don't mind. With so many of my stories being serious and angst filled, I think dipping into angst every so often, but remaining on fluff/humour is what this story and my readers need. The issues surrounding Rinoa's situation will remain, but I have made some alterations to the way I move the story forward. The ending was always vague for me, and when I sent the initial draft to Kris, I was a bit hesitant with the ending.

So to conclude (and to stop myself from rambling any further) I'd like my readers to come up with a better title for this fic, because I'm honestly out if ideas. Make it original and please do not take any titles from fics in other fandoms. Remember, the storyline is going to remain the same, but there will be small tweaks in getting to the ending (which by the way is far into the future :P). Never have I changed a title to a story nor changed my original direction before, but I think this will add to my experience, as has the posting chapter by chapter and not waiting for the entire story to be over.

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><p><strong>Chapter 10 – History<strong>

"I met Seifer the summer just after I had turned sixteen. Erm, there was this foreign exchange program and . . . basically he was situated in G-Garden," Rinoa began to explain, forcing out her words with difficulty. She never imagined having this conversation with Squall; quite frankly, she always thought he couldn't give a damn about Seifer, not even if it involved her.

"Yeah, the Garden set that up for prospective SeeD candidates. Their idea of having some fun before things get intense," Squall added.

Though Rinoa had not implied any need for elaboration on his part, he felt he had to contribute a reply. He didn't want to come off standoffish, nor did he want to remain silent. Yet at the same time, he still felt his comments were unneeded. He honestly hoped to show Rinoa he was interested in what she had to say, and not just because he was being a jealous boyfriend. Although a small part of him was already sitting on that side of the fence.

"Oh, were you also in G-Garden?" Rinoa asked. She watched Squall intensely, awaiting a response before anticipating how much of the story she should tell.

"No, actually I was hosting. I had a cadet visit me from G-Garden."

Rinoa breathed in deeply through her nose and then licked her dry lips, before carrying on with her story. "Well, Seifer came to G-Garden and that's . . . when I met him. I'll be honest; I thought he was cute, slightly cocky but, he was generally nice. He told me about how he was getting a bit bored at Garden because the teachers were purposefully failing him and he was sick of being a cadet."

"He said that?" Squall asked with an astonished frown. "Seifer has failed a lot of tests, but I don't think the Instructors failed him purposefully. He has an attitude problem that really affects following orders; it's why Cid came down on him so hard after our SeeD test."

"Look Squall, I don't want to get into Garden politics or whatever you wanna call it. Honestly, even when Seifer was complaining, I didn't really care. I just wanted . . ." Rinoa paused looking for the right word. She let out a huff and continued, "I just wanted to escape my life . . . without sounding so dramatic. That week, there was a lot of news coverage about the growing number of resistance factions in Timber. I don't think he was that serious about it but, he made a comment about it being a cause to fight for, and that he would look into it.

"I asked if I could join him and he said if I was up for it, then I could. We spent the rest of the week planning how we were going to get there and I'll admit, a lot of it was just messing around in the canteen, avoiding-"

"Canteen?" Squall frowned.

"Er, yeah. We used to meet in the canteen at G-Garden." Rinoa blinked at Squall who merely nodded and waited for her to continue.

When Squall gestured with his hand to carry on, Rinoa took another deep breath of air. "We had some fun planning what we were going to do in order to help Timber. The night Balamb cadets were to leave G-Garden was the same night he helped me 'escape'. We took a train to Timber. I spent my first night at a hotel – and before you ask, we slept in separate rooms," Rinoa paused, seeing Squall ease at her quick comment. "Mrs DiMarco told me about the leader of the Forest Foxes. I got in touch with her and she introduced me to Zone and Watts . . . the rest is history from there."

"Did you see Seifer at all after that?" Squall scrutinised Rinoa's behaviour as she fidgeted with the tassels on the purple cushion beside her. He could tell from her lowered eyes and the way she bit down on her bottom lip that she was nervous. As usual, he could distinguish the _how_, but not the _why._ Other than the fact that he didn't get along with Seifer, talking about a possible ex to your current boyfriend probably wasn't a normal conversation topic and, somewhere down the line, trespassed on relationship privacy.

"A couple of times, he did visit me. But then he got really busy at Garden and I didn't see him until the night of the inauguration ball where I met you."

Rinoa shifted in her seat, resting against the arm of the couch and extending her legs so her feet rested against Squall's lap.

"He called like an hour before he was on his way to the SeeD exam. He never was good with timing." She rolled her eyes and let out a pathetic chuckle. "He said he was definitely going to pass this time round, and as soon as he was made SeeD, he was going to get Cid to approve our request. I was excited. I got on a train immediately that evening and when I arrived at Balamb, I waited at the Garden gates where he said he'd meet me. I waited and waited but he didn't show."

"I think I know why," Squall muttered, nodding his head.

"Well, I know now too, but I didn't at the time. Anyway, I got sick of waiting, so I went in and looked around for him . . . that's when I saw you." She stared into Squall's eyes warmly, a sweet smile lingering on her face.

"And came up to me with the lamest pick-up line and dragged me onto the dance floor," Squall dramatically cried, smirking at Rinoa.

"Er, excuse me, but in case you've forgotten, I am your girlfriend. That pick-up line was a success, I should write an entire book on _'How to pull Moody-guys onto dance floors'_ – pun not intended," she stuck out her tongue and then began laughing.

Squall couldn't help but laugh along with her. "That sounds like something Irvine would co-author, or maybe even edit."

"Oh no," Rinoa groaned. "I think Irvine's genre falls into _'The Beginners Guide to Triple Triad: Round-Robin and Three-way play'_." Upon hearing her own words, she let out a snort and couldn't stop the fit of giggles that followed thereafter. This was definitely a text message she'd have to send to Quistis.

"Huh? I don't get it," Squall replied, his creased forehead a clear indication of his incomprehension.

"Oh . . . nothing, you won't understand," Rinoa dismissed her comment with a wave of her hand.

Squall watched as she began massaging her cheeks from the laughter, her smile still evident. She did have a weird sense of perceiving things, but it was refreshing and it made him realise just how positively Rinoa saw the world. She could spin any negative situation into one that benefitted them in some way or another. Even during their time in space, millions of miles away from home, no food, no sustenance, no contact with anyone other than themselves. But Rinoa was thankful for the simple fact of being able to breathe. Of course at the time, he was concerned with getting to safety; the battle wasn't entirely over. But in hindsight, Squall had wished that he had given into that moment of weakness or naïvety – whatever it was, and given her that darn hug. There were times when he wished he could have her mindset, see the world in her eyes and not the blood-stained, cut and bruised barren land that was in front of him. He wished that he could just simply enjoy the feeling of being alive.

It was a stark contrast that fate had put them together. He was normally the one to see the glass half empty and ironically, he wound up with someone who most probably would drink the entire contents of the glass, give you a cheeky giggle, then claim the glass was now _completely_ empty.

Silence had filled the room far too long. It wasn't because neither of them wanted the conversation to continue, Rinoa knew that she had to rid herself of some of the burden she was carrying by not having this out in the open. But still, she needed a couple more minutes to really think about the night of the inauguration ball and she assumed Squall did too.

So for a few more minutes they sat in silence, recollecting the memory of that night many months and months ago. Neither knew at the time it would lead to a rollercoaster of a ride together. Nor did either of them think they'd be sitting on a perfectly decorated couch actually conversing with one another, without making childish comments and irrational accusations.

"Erm," Rinoa hesitatingly broke the silence and Squall lifted his head to meet her gaze. "After our dance, I spotted Seifer to one corner; that's why I left."

"I had assumed you had found the person you were looking for; I just didn't know it was him."

"Yeah, he had said on the phone call I had with him that he'd introduce me to Cid, so that's why I rushed off. He wasn't in a good mood and being the stupidly ill-mannered doofus that I am, I didn't even bother to ask. I was just too consumed with getting Cid to agree to our proposition so that I could go back to Timber and tell Zone and Watts."

"So you had no clue that he hadn't passed?" Squall asked, though his question was pointless given he was the one who informed her of such during their second meeting.

"No. I just assumed he was in a bad mood – he was like that sometimes, summer experience hindered my judgement. Back then he was all fun and jokes, making me laugh and telling me how he was going to help me free Timber. But when school started, he just became moody and no fun to talk to. Everything was always _'Instructor Trepe doesn't like me because of this. Instructor Trepe doesn't like me because of that. Emo-boy always gets preferential treatment_'."

"Ahem," Squall cleared his throat upon hearing the last comment. Rinoa instantly paused, waiting for further clarification for being interrupted. "Nothing, continue." Squall dismissed his interruption, save the embarrassment that would ensue when explaining exactly who 'Emo-boy' was. Of course, that insult was more of a complement compared to 'Puberty-boy'. If there was one social rule Squall understood, it was that no girl liked to hear that her boyfriend was the pubescent butt of jokes.

"Well, to be fair," Rinoa soon continued, "he _was_ fun to be around; he was always joking and being really positive about Timber's outcome. And while he didn't make SeeD, he still helped me get our request approved."

Squall nodded again, but found that seemed to be all he did. Truthfully, there was no other action he could perform. He wasn't particularly thrilled hearing about Seifer, let alone through Rinoa's mouth. At least he felt relieved that nothing serious had happened. At the same time, he also found it rather difficult to hear Seifer was someone 'fun' to be around. Both those words in the same sentence seemed nonexistent, not that Squall was one to talk. Nevertheless, the only "fun" contributions Seifer had ever made were his personalised roll-call of the cadets and the occasional extracurricular activities held by the Disciplinary Committee, of which no one other than committee members saw fun in.

"Anyway, given that Seifer was in a bad mood, he just dropped me off at the train station and I went back to Timber in high hopes. It wasn't until I met you guys the next day that you told me Seifer didn't make SeeD. I felt so guilty after that. He must have thought I was so conceited and selfish."

"I'm sure he didn't," Squall tried to be comforting. "Maybe a bit clueless."

"No, I really think his liking for me dissolved then. Why else would he sacrifice me to a sorceress?" Though her eyes widened, she smirked at the Commander.

It was a refreshing feeling to some extent that the two were able to converse about such a matter. For Rinoa, she hadn't been exactly sure of what had happened between Squall and Quistis, and while she had been eager to be aware of their past activities, at the same time, she had also been very insecure about receiving the truth.

Similarly, while Squall wanted to know if anything had blossomed between his girlfriend and Seifer, it was excruciatingly difficult to accept that maybe something had, and possibly, these feelings could remain buried somewhere deep down.

It wasn't so much the fact that maybe Rinoa could have been 'dethroned' by another man in her life, but that she had allowed someone in her heart and at any time, maybe that love would resurface. He had never loved anyone before Rinoa, and he doubted he ever would. And not because there was no one he could love, maybe if he had led a very different life he would have had a lot more fortune in that department. No, this love was purely down to the fact that it was destined. Out of all the people in the world, he had found someone he was willing to risk his life for, and he had already proved that countless times. Yes, he was a SeeD and technically their contract clearly stated his protection of the members of the Forest Owls was in effect, but he didn't venture out to save her in space for that reason alone. His reasons were sincere, and boiled down to one simple understanding. He had never felt this way before. Period.

"Well of course you know what happened after the inauguration ball. I didn't see Seifer until we met up with him in G-Garden," Rinoa concluded.

"Erm, yeah about that." Squall hesitated, fiddling with his watch, unsure of how to ask the question without coming across too intrusive, or sounding like a jealous boyfriend. "When Seifer saw you, he asked if you were going to fight him."

Rinoa nodded, thinking back to the day. She watched as Squall glanced up at her, his eyes not fully making contact with hers.

"He told you to remember back to last summer where you guys did something, but you cut him off before you could finish." Squall focused on the contours of Rinoa's face, scrutinizing to observe any clenching of the jaw, or any other form of hesitancy. It wasn't that he expected her to lie, but it was a personal question and he wasn't entirely sure she would be comfortable answering it. She had mentioned that she wouldn't tell him everything, but only what he needed to know.

Rinoa shook her head and exhaled loudly. "Squall, you have to remember something. What I said when we arrived at G-Garden the first time, about liking Seifer and thinking it was love . . . I was unsure. Honestly, I did have a crush on him, and I meant what I said; I _really_ liked him. He was nice to me, he treated me like I was important, and he exuded so much confidence. I liked him because he made me feel significant when my Dad had more or less given up on me, and found any way to get rid of me."

"Rid of you? How?" Squall asked.

Rinoa rolled her eyes and shook her head again. "It's not important. Long story short, when I met Seifer I wasn't living at home."

Squall thought it better not to delve further into that matter. He was certain Rinoa didn't want to elaborate on her relationship with her estranged father. If anyone sitting on that purple feathered sofa could understand and empathise, it was definitely Squall.

"But as I was saying, what I said about Seifer was one-sided. I honestly never knew how he felt about me, and I was too afraid to ask. I think after I turned seventeen, I kinda outgrew the crush and it was more of an admiration, because he was still insistent on helping the Forest Owls and we had a good time whenever he'd visit me.

"But that's as far as it ever got. Nothing happened between us and he was just trying to remind me of our time together back in G-Garden. Honestly, if anything had happened, do you really think I would have asked you to dance with me? Or gone along and fought against Seifer?"

Squall weighed the concept in his head, and frankly, he had to agree. It did seem rather odd that if anything had happened between Rinoa and Seifer, and was still ongoing during the inauguration ball, what benefit or interest did Rinoa have with him? The entire time he had spent with Rinoa during the mission, not once had she used any lame pick-up lines on other random guys they met on their travels. He knew there were no trust issues on his side. He did trust Rinoa, and if she claimed nothing had happened between herself and Seifer, then he was willing to believe that.

Rinoa shifted in her seat, moving closer to Squall. She placed both hands on either side of his face and looked directly into his eyes. "Squall, I wouldn't lie to you, especially not about me and Seifer. I didn't know exactly how I felt about Seifer at the time, but I know how I feel about you. I love you."

He smiled at her. Bringing his thumb and index finger to grip her chin and pulled her down for a kiss. It was brief with just the smallest amount of pressure, but it was enough to wordlessly get his feelings across.

Rinoa took another breath, still unsure whether or not Squall was completely satisfied with her answer. Honestly, it really was down to the fact that she was keeping things from him. And while she stated that it wasn't important, a part of her felt it was and would have a substantial impact on their relationship.

It wasn't as if she was lying to him, but withholding the truth bore the same feeling of guilt. She knew something would loom over her shoulder for every day she kept her life a secret.

Truthfully, she wanted to tell him, a part of her thought Squall would say be ecstatic. Well, maybe ecstatic wasn't the right word, it wasn't like the Commander of Garden would do a little chocobo dance and offer her a high-five. But this little bit of information could be one common ground between them. However, with that common ground came the accusation of hypocrisy, and Rinoa was certain she didn't want to tread down that path. If memory served fit, and currently Squall was very spot on about their affairs, he would call her out.

The entire situation was bringing on a headache and as Rinoa rubbed her temples, Squall placed a hand on her head, smoothing down her hair.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"Yeah," Rinoa tiredly replied, "Think maybe all this thinking is giving me a migraine."

"Well I think maybe you shouldn't think so much, since thinking isn't really your strong point, but that's just what I think, it might not be what you think," Squall replied and gave Rinoa a cheeky smile. "Then again, maybe your kind of thinking would be more fruitful if I provided you with enough floor space to plop yourself down on."

It took Rinoa a good few seconds to digest the entirety of Squall's sentences before she came to an understanding. In response, she playfully smacked his chest. "You meany! Need I remind you we are a non-profit and non-funded organisation. Unlike Garden, we don't have the luxurious facilities to aid our endeavours," she cried in defence.

"Hey, I resent your accusatory tone. Are you rightfully accusing Garden of indulging in extravagant furniture? Because if you are, I think you're quite right."

"Damn right, I'm . . . right? . . . Wait, that doesn't seem right. I mean correct. Gah! I need sleep!" Rinoa began chuckling to herself. She really was out of it by now. All this over-thinking and anxiety was slowly leading her to some form of insanity.

"We don't have to talk anymore, if you want," Squall amusedly offered, not wanting to distress his girlfriend any further.

"Hm, you'd love that wouldn't you? I hope you're not slowly creeping back into that shell of yours. I quite like your speech marathons," she remarked, before sticking her tongue out at him.

"You keep sticking that out and one day I'm going to bite it off," he threatened with a smirk.

"Oh, don't tempt me."

As she winked at him, he wrapped his arms around her waist and brought her closer towards him. Their faces were inches apart for a few seconds while they aligned their heads in the correct positions before kissing. He could feel Rinoa smiling through the kiss and assumed she found humour in his kissing style. So he had to ensure his nose didn't bump hers, or that his teeth didn't clash against her top lip. Was there any wrong in following a kissing protocol?

Again they broke from one another, only this time for air. Rinoa rested her head on Squall's shoulder, but this soon became quite uncomfortable as her arched back began to ache. Sensing her discomfort as she shifted in position, Squall lay down and beckoned for her to join him. She laid her head on his shoulder, and for those few brief moments of silence, they contemplated on the night's events.

This was definitely a conversation they needed to have. Getting the skeletons out of the closet and all that malarkey. Neither could deny the life they had before they met the other, and while both seemed to tether on the suspicious side, in actuality, both were innocent.

They knew they loved one another, and that love surpassed any feelings they'd possibly had for anyone else. Nevertheless, the revelation wasn't entirely about exes and rumours, it was more about trusting one another, and accepting their past in order to move towards a better future.

Rinoa knew that there would come a point in her life where she would one hundred per cent confide in Squall about her past life, but this night was not it. This night they had to concentrate on the insecurities created from the emotions they could or could not show one another.

And while it could be perceived as an excuse of shying away from the truth, a huge part of her knew that the amount of detail she'd need to provide, to save Squall ever feeling second best, this night was not long enough for her to explain. And there was no way, even with all the power she had in her hands, would she ever think of extending time.

"Rinoa?" Squall softly whispered. Rinoa had almost missed it, but thankfully the way his lips moved against the top of her head had caught her attention.

"Hm?"

"I do have something important to tell you. I was going to tell you tonight, but well, this happened." He tried not to make his words imply any form of irritation. Yes, this entire fiasco could have been extinguished if he had been straightforward about Quistis's affair, but he knew this conversation needed be said. However, now so did another.

He gently pushed her off his chest and the two got into a sitting position similar to how they started out. He placed a hand on her thigh, not sure if it was a sign of comfort for his own sake or hers. But a part of him needed for them to be touching.

"I actually have to go away for a couple of weeks, it's Garden related and I honestly don't want to go, but I can't not go. I wanted to take you, but Martine thinks that with everything going on in Galbadia, and you being a sorceress who hasn't anticipated what you're capable of, it's not good if you're there."

"Oh . . . er, sorry Squall you're going to have to run that by me again. No wait, scratch the running bit, I'm beginning to dislike your marathons."

"Ha-ha," Squall kept his face expressionless. "Martine and I have to go away next week. There's this press conference in Galbadia and we're going to meet with some officials. I can't go into the specifics, as they will officially release the details to the public tomorrow. But in short, we're going to Galbadia."

"And that's why I can't come," Rinoa nodded as Squall's earlier words started making sense.

"Exactly. They've just faced Sorceress Edea and saw the true reality of Vinzer Deling. Not that they know you're a sorceress, but if anything were to happen and somehow they find out about your powers, it may lead to complications and I don't want to put you at risk."

"No I understand," Rinoa replied, but her face told Squall otherwise.

He waited for her to confide in what was bothering her, giving her a minute to finish biting the bottom of her lip to gain the confidence and tell him what she was thinking. Eventually she smirked at him and let out a small chuckle.

"It's just that, this will be the first time we'll be apart since the mission." She shrugged her shoulder, not knowing why she chose that action, but she guessed it was her way of accepting that, sooner or later, she would need to be independent and not heavily rely on her Knight.

"I know Rin, and I did speak to Martine about it and tried to convince him on letting me stay, but if I'm to take on this position as Headmaster, I'm going to have to attend these functions and show my face. It's not so much about me actually, more about Garden and our position and purpose in the world. We have to keep in mind that while we did save the world from Ultimecia, we're still being blamed for the Lunar Cry and Lunatic Pandora. And honestly, both are our fault," Squall concluded, hoping this time Rinoa would be able to digest his words easily. He couldn't determine exactly when he had become so eloquent, but presently they had both switched personalities.

"I understand. Don't worry about me," Rinoa dismissed her earlier comment and forced a smile.

"You'll be safe here in Garden. Zell and Quistis will be here to keep an eye on you-"

"Oh thanks, I'm glad you can trust me," Rinoa rolled her eyes, half in jest.

"No!" Squall immediately jumped to his defence. "I didn't mean it like that. I meant that if anything were to happen-"

"Yeah, like me blowing up Garden, or heaven forbid, kompressing time," Rinoa interjected.

"No, you're not letting me finish," Squall deadpanned, hastily trying to get his words in edgeways.

"It's okay, Squall. I knew I had to expect this kind of attitude and treatment. I just . . . I never thought it'd be coming from you." Rinoa pressed her lips together, her face straining in pain, before she buried her face in her hands and her shoulders began shaking.

Squall watched silently, his lips pursed and his arms folded together. It only took a couple of seconds for Rinoa's giggles to turn to loud seal-like laughter and she peeked through her fingers.

"Are we quite done yet?" he asked with mild annoyance. "This isn't funny, you know."

"It's a little funny." Rinoa held back another bout of laughter.

"Yeah, try repeating those lines to Martine, or better yet, the entire Galbadian and Estharian nation, and then tell me it's funny."

"Oh, you poopy-pants." Rinoa straightened her back and crossed her arms defiantly. "You suck all the fun out of things. Why is it everyone else can make fun of me, but I can't make fun of myself."

"It's not about making fun of yourself, but more about what you're capable of doing," Squall corrected her. He didn't want to suck the fun out, after the ordeal Rinoa had faced in the past weeks, he knew she needed this time of silly banter. However, at the same time, he couldn't have her slipping up and making comments about her capabilities of ruining the world. While he and the gang could understand Rinoa's humour, the cadets and rest of the Garden officials would not take it too kindly.

Squall also didn't want to remind Rinoa that Edea already faced the guilt and burden of being responsible for Garden's cadets and SeeDs being injured and killed in the battle against G-Garden. It wasn't a light matter and honestly, there wasn't any humour in such a situation. He knew Rinoa hadn't meant it in any vindictive or disrespectful way, but she had to be cautious about her jokes and who she was joking with.

It seemed like while he was thinking, Rinoa had surmised the same conclusion. "I'm sorry, Squall. I honestly wasn't thinking when I made that joke." She bent her head down and looked at her lap again.

He felt guilty seeing her retract. It was surreal how they both emulated each other's personality. It was ironic how he was a lot more vocal, and Rinoa was now the pessimistic one. Neither of them had even thought that their lives would change this much; that they'd be in a constricted relationship, never truly knowing how far they could go. It was a heavy burden for Rinoa to carry, knowing that her life would never return to normal, not unless she underwent Odine's theory.

"Don't worry. I know you're not capable of anything evil, but you just need to be cautious of what you say around people. Remember, we're your friends and we know you. But other people won't be too happy with you joking about your powers, especially those who have lost friends and family in battle." Squall placed his hand on her shoulder. Rinoa didn't look up but nodded her head in acceptance.

It took Squall a moment to gather his thoughts, reversing through his train of thought until he remembered where the tangent had begun.

"So while Martine and I will be gone, I'll have people here to take care of you. I won't be gone for long, two weeks at most. I'll leave my number with you and I'm always an email away."

"I'll be fine, Squall. But I'll make sure to call." She smiled at him, placing her free hand over the one he had on her shoulder.

"Good. The weeks will go by so quickly, you'll hardly feel I'm gone." And while he said the words, they both knew they would feel the effects of not being together.

Since the day they met, there wasn't a day they were apart. During the missile base incident he had kept Rinoa on his team, and while he expected her to think it was all down to protecting her as he was contracted to, realistically it boiled down to saving himself the hassle of saving her from yet another scenario. He honestly couldn't handle another situation where Rinoa was cowering in fear and couldn't find the strength to defend herself. Although she had proved quite the opposite as time went on. It wasn't that he didn't believe in her now, but that he knew she lacked in independence when they first met and he couldn't afford to put her at risk.

Since that incident, he had advised Rinoa to stay close to him, though that currently was still up for interpretation – sitting on his lap wasn't exactly what he meant by those words. But still, he was happy he decided to keep her beside him. After she had gone into a coma, it was all he could do but remain beside her. He had felt that he failed her, and a part of him still believed he hadn't done enough to protect her. He had known she wasn't ready for battle, but instead of keeping her on the sidelines, he had allowed her and in some sense, encouraged her, to participate alongside them.

Never again did he want to make that mistake of exposing her to harm. He had to go to Galbadia, that wasn't up for discussion, but he would make sure that she remained safe in Garden.

Rinoa stretched her arms above her head and let out a tired yawn. Looking at the clock hanging on the wall she saw that it was already approaching midnight. She couldn't believe they had been talking for that long.

"You wanna head to bed?" Squall asked, taking her hand gently in his.

"Yeah," Rinoa answered, sliding her hand out of his grasp. He looked up at her expectantly, surprised by her reaction, or rather lack of. "But I'm going to head to _my_ bed."

Squall blinked. "Oh." He paused, feeling embarrassed and stupid for his subtle suggestion. She had already mentioned before getting deep into their conversation that she didn't want him to spend nights over at her apartment – it was what led to her doubting him after all. Of course, he should have expected the same in regards to her staying over at his apartment.

"Sorry, I just think it's better if we stick to the Garden rules. And I know I'm one to talk, Miss-rule-breaker-of-the-year," Rinoa rolled her eyes and gave Squall a lop-sided smile, striving to make light of the situation.

"Nah, I understand." Squall nodded.

As she made her way to the door, Squall followed, hoping that during any moment of the six second walk to the door, Rinoa would turn around and decide that she had changed her mind.

Once Rinoa reached the door, she opened it slowly and stepped outside. Squall held onto the door as she turned to face him. She gave him another cheerful smile and lifted her hand up and gave him a pathetic wave.

"Well, I guess I'll see you in the morning," she said.

"Yeah, sure," he replied.

"Okay," Rinoa breathed in and looked around at the empty halls. "G'night."

". . . night." Squall remained standing still, hoping she'd change her mind. But as she turned around and began taking quick paces towards her quarter, he knew she wasn't coming back.

Once her body turned the corner and out of sight, he allowed his door to creak to a shut. He stood facing the closed door, an empty feeling in his chest at the prospect of having to be without her for two whole weeks.

As he switched off the living room lights and allowed the darkness to fall over the entire room, completely blinding his sight, he felt his way till he reached his bedroom door.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's End Note:<strong> This is the end of the Hotdog arc, hope you've enjoyed it. I have written the main scene for the next chapter which was huge fun to write, it's similar to Rinoa and Quistis's scene in chapter 8. :)

I hope no one thinks I took a cop-out in regards to the RinoaxSeifer aspect of FFVIII. I've always believed that the initial suggestions about those two were only because SquareEnix was going to develop a love triangle, but they later scrapped it. Which is why after disk 1 Rinoa is ready to take on Seifer even though he hadn't done anything to her directly. Also, the reasons I had Rinoa state in the story are my own. I don't understand how anything could have happened between them if Rinoa was willing for Squall to fight Seifer (yes she said she'd rather it not happen, but she also said she understood) and she herself fought against him too. Similarly, Seifer was just willing to sacrifice Rinoa to Adel, and again, I don't think dancing with Squall first would have warranted such behaviour. So those are my opinions, if you share them, whoo! If not, well you're wrong! JK! :D

On a different note, I'd like to kindly ask my readers for reviews to the chapter. I know it may seem like I get a lot of reviews compared to other authors on here, but I don't think people know why reviews are so important. It's not about numbers, but more about knowing who is reading. Checking the stats and seeing 200+ people have read a chapter of which only 9 have reviewed is kinda disheartening. Just writing a simple line of what you liked about the chapter really does wonders when looking for motivation. I honestly did lose interest in writing a few weeks back because it felt like this community was slowly dying, and I was almost like 'well, no point writing for a story barely anyone reads'. So please, if you don't normally review, please take some time to write a line. Even if it's not in English, I can always use Google translate :)

As for my regular reviewers, thank you ever so much. Your support is outstanding. Less than three!


	11. Recognition

**Author Notes: **Wow! So the last time I updated this was a year ago. Good thing I didn't leave on a cliff-hanger, that would've sucked Chocobo balls.  
>My apologies for leaving fanfiction high and dry, little annoying thing called life keeps interrupting my writing time.<p>

Well, a lot has happened this year, and I don't want to bore you with it, so in short I'm back writing again :) I'll hopefully be posting fairly regularly - not as regular as I'd like as I'm still working full-time. But Niqsta is hopefully back in action (yes, I just referred to myself in third person).

This chapter was just sitting on my computer for a good year. Some of you might be a little confused and may need to skim read over previous chapters, for that I'm sorry.

So, without further ado . . .

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 11 – Recognition<strong>

The blaring monotonous sound of Rinoa's alarm emanated through the room, a painful irritation to her ears that made her squint in displeasure. With a grunt, she lunged a small fraction forward and slammed her hand down on the alarm, knocking over a few items in the process.

She lethargically rolled onto her back; spreading her arms and legs across the bed, she pushed them out in the same manner as making a snow angel on her bed. She let out a heavy yawn and then rolled onto her side, snuggling her duvet against her and thinking the unthinkable. If only she could use her powers just this once; just another fifteen minutes to rejuvenate herself.

Staying up very late with Squall was probably not such a good idea considering the 6:00AM wake up calls. Rinoa needed at least eight hours beauty sleep on top of the hour naps she took during the day. She wasn't used to this type of (working) life, it was one of the reasons she was put her off from becoming a SeeD, aside from her disbelief in following orders that contradicted everything she stood for.

No, this was just too early, she couldn't fathom how anyone could wake up before the sun rose; it was unnatural, and some power of authority should have made it down right illegal. In that moment of despair, she wished she was in her own bedroom back at Caraway Mansion. She could almost feel the soft duck feathered pillow beneath her head, her fuchsia coloured silk bed-sheets, and the half dozen stuffed animals that slept next to her.

A smile graced her face. There was the ballerina Mog she had received for her tenth birthday with its cute frilly pink skirt, a Cactuar, a wizard Chicobo with removable wand, a Phoenix, a Tonberry decked in a chef's outfit, and of course, her favourite: the Moomba. That particular animal had a voice recorder so that when she pressed on its stomach it repeated the same words. She would have hours of fun making the Moomba say different things.

Recollecting her days at the Mansion felt like a lifetime ago. She hadn't known at the time that her future lay somewhere else, that one day she wouldn't be living at home, but rather in a mercenary institute. That thought a few years ago would have scared her enough to run into Daddy's arms. Her relationship with him had changed over time, now he was most probably the last person she'd run to. Well, other than Seifer.

Regardless of the situation with her father, she was content. So she wasn't exactly thrilled at waking up before the sun, nor did she like that she more or less stacked books for a living and hadn't really thought about her future – currently that thought scared her more. But at present, she was with Squall and that's all that mattered. He would be there for her; he had proven that by saving her countless times. He had promised that he'd always be here and she trusted him.

As another smile graced her face Rinoa realised she didn't mind waking up so early.

* * *

><p>Squall walked into the cafeteria, nodding to a few cadets who greeted him, before scanning the crowd for his friends. Spotting them sitting in the far corner from the rest of the inhabitants of the mess hall, Squall rolled the magazine in his hands and tucked it under his arm as he approached his friends.<p>

He had asked them to gather at the cafeteria to update them on a few events that would take place in the upcoming weeks. Martine had him working in the office from the early hours of the day to very late at night. Due to that reason he hadn't had the time to see them individually and thought it was better to huddle them together. Though he wouldn't let Rinoa in on that little secret save she bring up his little criticism on the Forest Owls' method of group meetings. This was _obviously_ different; contingency plans on Garden's square lunch tables were far superior than dusty train floors. However, criticism aside, he could understand the measures that needed to be taken in situations where time was sparse – even if it was quite unorthodox.

Reaching the table where his friends sat, Squall hung his jacket on the spare chair and tossed the magazine on the table, which emanated a soft _thwack_.

The group's conversation was put to a halt as they turned to look up at him, questioning his bizarre approach. Their gaze drifted between their Commander and the magazine now lying on the table.

Quistis raised an eyebrow. "What's this?"

"This is a magazine, a publication issued at regular intervals, most commonly either weekly or monthly, comprising of advertisements, articles, photographs and stories. They're different to newspapers, normally due to their smaller size, layout, and glossy pages," Squall explained. "The distribution of magazines can be defined in three categories; paid, free and controlled. This particular magazine falls under the paid category, of which I had to pay 100 gil extra than that of a Galbadian citizen since it is imported from the (future) Republic of Timber."

Looking at the group, he could already see Quistis and Rinoa roll their eyes at his more than detailed answer. Zell just sat in his seat clearly confused to what was being said, whereas Irvine and Selphie didn't seem to be too bothered - they quite liked Squall's rare quirkiness.

"In other, simpler terms, this is an issue of Timber Maniacs and I just finished reading it."

"Oh, right!" Zell cried out eagerly, his head bopping energetically to confirm his understanding.

"So, what's this magazine all about?" Quistis asked, picking it up and inspecting the front cover. Her eyes widened with keen interest as she read the main heading to herself before repeating it out loud.

"_August Presidential Elections – Galbadia chooses their new leader!" _

"Really?" Rinoa piped up excitedly. Whipping her head over Quistis's shoulder she inspected the front cover.

"Absolutely. After Vinzer Deling was killed and Edea returned to her former state, the country was relying on Seifer. Well, we put a lid on that and Galbadia's been under martial law since," Squall clarified as he took a seat next to Rinoa.

The magazine was quickly passed around the table, each one of the group inspecting the two men pictured on the front before it finally landed in Zell's hand, who eagerly flipped through the pages and started reading the article provided.

"Well, it's about time. Maybe this new leader can finally do something towards Galbadia's stability and the treaty with Timber," Quistis remarked.

"I hope they do. Otherwise all our efforts with Deling will go to a complete waste if Timber still isn't liberated," Rinoa quipped. "I should call Zone and Watts and find out what's going on."

The Sorceress couldn't believe that it had been nearly a month ago that their battle with Ultimecia had ended and she still hadn't checked on her friends. It wasn't that she didn't care about them or that she had replaced them, but it was difficult to keep in contact with them when she was so far away and had a lot of other pressing matters on her mind. She still hadn't had the time to sit down and research the implications of her sorceress abilities.

But that still wasn't an excuse. Zone and Watts had done their utmost to keep her safe, in fact Zone even went as far as putting himself in danger just so Quistis could get to G-Garden along with her comrades. Friends like that didn't come along often, and their actions were not to be neglected. Making a mental note to herself, she promised she would call Zone that evening.

"Well, that is what I wanted to discuss with you all. In about two weeks-"

"Oh my God!" Zell cried out, cutting Squall off and attracting the entire group's attention, as well as a few other cadets sitting nearby in the process. "Please tell me this isn't a typo."

The other inhabitants of the table peered over Zell's shoulder, Rinoa and Selphie rising up from their seats trying to look at the magazine opposite them. Squall was the more successful one being seated right next to the Martial Artist and located just what Zell was screaming about.

Sighing from what he knew would be a tangent of sorts, Squall quickly interjected, "No, unfortunately that is his name and he's the likely candidate to be voted for."

"So, Galbadia will have their very own President _Willcock_?" Zell cackled loudly. Irvine snatched the magazine off his hands and inspected it himself.

"Oh God, that's just too funny to be believable." He placed the magazine on the table, his finger positioned directly underneath the name. The image of the said candidate smiling in high spirits with his name printed underneath his picture just made the scenario far more laughable than it really was.

"Well it's true; I'm to meet him next week. In fact, all Garden officials are to meet with Mr Wilcock and other press. The Gardens' involvement is really just for publicity; show the world that we have united again." Squall briefly glanced at Rinoa, trying to discern if her body language gave away any signs of disappointment. They had already had this conversation the night before and she had assured him she could survive two weeks without him.

But in all honestly, the challenge was being away from her. Since they had met in Timber, there wasn't a day that had passed them both where they weren't together. Even when the party had to split in groups, one heading to the missile base, the other returning to Garden, Squall had kept Rinoa close to him. It was initially due to ordering her to stay close to him back in Deling City for safety reasons – the only order she had stuck to religiously, but he now realised that the order was no longer serving just that purpose alone. Having Rinoa around him, keeping her out of harm's way was not just due the fact they were under contract. No, he had genuine fear for her welfare and, in a slight selfish manner, it made him feel secure knowing she was right beside him.

"Well, do what is required of you to set a good example of SeeD, Squall. Just don't _bend over_ backwards to be nice to him." Zell laughed and the others soon followed with giggles.

"Yeah, because if he's anything like Vinzer Deling, he may just _lay_ into you and give you a good _beating." _Irvine continued on as Squall rolled his eyes at their joshing.

It wasn't long before the others started to join in the festivities, and so Squall sat there watching and listening as his friends had a good old laugh at the potential president's name.

"I'm sure he's nothing like Deling. If he is picked I'm sure he'll _plunge,_ _head_first into Galbadia's problems." Quistis giggled.

"Well, Galbadia does have many hurdles to overcome, I hope he has the _stamina _to _keep going,_" Rinoa responded with her own chuckle.

The Commander couldn't help but reveal a small smirk. The guy did have a pretty funny surname. But still, he was a good candidate and Squall couldn't just sit here and allow the prospective president's name to tarnish his reputation.

"All right, all right, he has a funny name, but Martine has known him for a long while now and he said he's a genuine and caring man. He wants the betterment of his country and he's willing to do anything to bring peace and unity to Timber and the rest of Galbadia. Someone like that should be respected; he has my full support in the upcoming _erections_."

The group's laugher from the unexpected comment echoed through the hall. A number of cadets turned to inspect the commotion, utterly confused by the spectacle; Irvine's fist banging on the table at the play on words, Rinoa holding her sides as she let out a series of cackles, and poor Quistis wiping away humorous tears before a trickle of mascara could run down her pale white cheeks. Squall was always serious and down to business, but even now with his face completely emotionless, it made his joke even more hilarious.

Zell continued on, clearly not yet satisfied, "I sure do hope he doesn't make a _cock _of himself."

"Yeah, and he'll actually be a _firm_ standing President who'll help Galbadia when he _cums_ to power," Irvine followed on as the other groaned at the last of the jokes.

"Eww, Irvine, not funny, too graphic." Rinoa shook her head, but giggles betrayed her.

Squall sat there in partial silence, watching his friends' laughter and exchange with new found happiness.

Though they had defeated Ultimecia not long ago, throwing himself into Garden work didn't allow him the time to sit and enjoy being with his friends. Even the night of Cid's party had him absent minded from the revelation that he had a father. There really was never a time nor freedom for him to actually sit back and enjoy being with his friends. Enjoy the freedom they had knowing their oppression had ended.

Yet, even that scared him; Rinoa's earlier words were comforting to his ears but his heart knew better than to blindly follow them. Life wasn't as easy as taking each day as it came and just living the 'now'. He had to think about the issues that often popped up out of nowhere; he had to think about tomorrow, if not for his sake, than for his friends. Sure it wasn't nice being the pessimistic one in the group, but for their enjoyment he had to be the cautious one, the deep thinker that never let his guard down.

Nevertheless, even when contemplating all that, Squall realised that this moment in time was a small paradise; a time that while limited, was still a stretch where he could relax and appreciate the company of his friends.

It bemused him that he was even using the 'F' word. Months ago he was insistent that he didn't need anyone in his life, that he had everything that could suffice him. Friends meant emotional baggage, platefuls of problems and the ever annoying invasion of privacy. He had detested such a thing for himself, yet now he couldn't comprehend how he had gone so long without having at least one person to confide in.

As he looked around the table, watching as Selphie giggled with innocence, Quistis holding her hand up to her mouth shyly unable to contain her laughter, even Irvine and Zell who continued to wear out the phallic jokes that had started this entire festivity off. Though he wouldn't ever actually say it, he had to thank Rinoa for opening him up to his friends.

A small inhibition tugged at his heart, the fear of losing his friends, losing Rinoa, still frightened him. It was annoying having his heart fill with doubts and insecurities, but his experiences as a child held more weight than that of the events from the date of his inauguration. He didn't want this to ever end, even with all the workload he was drowning under, he didn't ever want to be away from his friends. Just knowing they were only a corridor away, or typing away in the next office, put his mind at ease knowing he was no longer alone.

Taking a deep breath, Squall swallowed down his fears, smiled at his friends and cleared his throat.

"In all seriousness, I need to inform you all of a few things."

Now that he had gotten the attention back to himself, the group's laughter ceased, blushing faces staring at him intently only just remembering that there was more to the magazine than phallic references.

"Martine and I will be making a trip to Deling City next week. We'll be there a fortnight during which Quistis and Xu will hold the reins here." Squall looked around the table making sure each of the SeeDs plus Irvine and Rinoa were alert. "However, next week there is also a restoration team being sent to Trabia to help with the renovations, I wanted two members of this team to go."

As soon as the words left his mouth, it felt almost surreal. Even his friends flinched at his words, amusement and a flare of reflection as they remembered back to only a couple of months ago when the six of them were considered a 'team'. In a sad sense of reality, it was displeasing to think that they wouldn't be working together as often.

"So, I was thinking maybe Selphie and Irvine to head to Trabia . . . or maybe Selphie and Zell." Squall retracted his statement in doubts of the couple. He knew if he and Rinoa were sent to Trabia, cold freezing Trabia, where they were technically not under Garden rules, and most likely would need to share dorm rooms due to the lack of space, they would be tempted to use the trip for purposes other than restoration.

"No, Selphie and I were looking forward to this. You can trust us Squall, we won't let you down." Irvine smiled at the Commander, who hoped nothing lingered behind his sincerity.

Eventually relenting, Squall nodded and continued on, "All right. So, as you know Martine and I will be-"

"Oh! I got a good one!" Selphie cried out, causing Squall to be cut off for the second time that afternoon.

"Huh?" Squall grunted.

"I got a good joke," Selphie explained. The others looked at one another expectantly.

"Oh . . . okay, we're listening," Rinoa replied turning to face the brunette with full attention.

Selphie cleared her throat, a grin plastered across her face as she spoke. "President _Will_cock? More like President _Won't_cock. Haha!"

The group looked at each other in bizarre wonderment, not sure how to react, before Irvine clapped Selphie on the back and commended her, indicating with his eyes for the others to do the same. "Yeah, that was funny, Sefie."

"Very witty." Quistis couldn't help but smirk.

Squall leaned back against the backrest of his chair, allowing himself a smirk of his own, and looked down at the magazine. It was only natural that his friends would disperse from one tangent to another, completely unaware of the more important, pressing matters. But he liked it; he liked that they could be carefree and thus allow him to relax.

Sure he had to pass on the details and explain the procedure while he would be away. But for the last twenty minutes left of their lunch hour, the Commander decided not to disturb their peace. Instead, he sat there and let himself enjoy his friends' antics, even though his heart was telling him it wouldn't last long. If it didn't, he'd at least enjoy what he could get his hands on now.

Although, next time, he'd inform them of the plans before letting them view any objects of interest.

* * *

><p>"<em>Hello?"<em>

"Hi, is that Zone? It's Rinoa!" Rinoa cried into the phone excitedly.

"_Rinoa? Oh my God, how are you? It's been so long since we last talked, Watts and I have been so worried about you. The last thing we heard from Squall was that you were in a coma, I swear I have a good mind to come down and deal with that guy. He didn't even let us know you were fine. But you are fine, right? How is everything? Where are you now?"_

"Zone, Zone, calm down. I'm fine honestly, you worry too much. And please don't blame Squall, it's my fault for not contacting anyone, I was just . . . A lot has happened and I wasn't ready to talk to anyone." Rinoa rubbed her forehead, clenching her eyes shut. There was just far too much to tell and not enough time to explain, at least not on the phone and she really did not want to be having this conversation via a line she wasn't sure was so private. It was Garden after all; Cid could have tampered with the lines to make sure information was not somehow leaked out.

"_Is everything all right?"_ Zone asked. Rinoa could hear the concern in his tone.

"On the whole, things are good. Erm, I really want to see you guys."

"_Of course! We're dying to see you. When can you come to Timber? Have you heard about the new elections? We're definitely going for Mr Wilcock; I know for sure he'll get us out of this tight hole."_

Rinoa bit her tongue to prevent herself from laughing. Squall and the gang could participate in the joshing, but doubted Zone would find humour in something he was so passionate about.

"Oh, I don't think I can come to Timber. I have a job now."

"_Wow, that's great! Where do you work?"_

"Oh, well, I actually work in a library . . . at Balamb Garden." Rinoa held her breath, anticipating an influx of new questions.

"_Garden? You're in Garden? How long have you been there? Are you going to return? You're not a SeeD, are you? I can't imagine you as a SeeD, Princess."_

"No, I'm not a SeeD, I just work for the Library."

"_Oh, erm, Rinoa I have to go. Can we talk tonight?"_

"Ah, yeah sure, I just called because I'd heard about the presidential elections and wanted to see what you guys were up to. I'd really like to see you guys, so if there's any possible chance that you could come to Balamb, I'd be so grateful." Rinoa could hear the desperation in her voice, but hoped Zone would hear a tone of yearning.

"_Sure! The Forest Owls are actually holding a campaign for Mr Wilcock, we're not technically hired, but Naomi knows Mr Wilcock's aunt and Timber's backing him 100 percent."_

"So you guys will be pretty busy."

"_Well, yeah. But I'm sure Watts and I can spare a week. We can leave Charlie in charge. I think the two of us need a break. Well, other than the two weeks of relaxation we had on the __W__hite SeeD ship. But then again, that wasn't too much of a relaxation for me. You know my stomach problems, sea-sickness just made it worse. I don't want to get too graphic, but I spent a week barfing from both ends."_

"Eww," Rinoa cried, shaking her head from the mental image. That was not something she wanted to remember ever. "Okay, so how does next week sound? Squall will be away for a week, so I'll more or less be by myself."

"_Yeah, sure. We might not be able to stay for the entire week, what with the Press Conference and all, but I think we can manage a few days."_

"All right, cool. I guess I'll see you guys next week then?" Rinoa confirmed.

"Okay. I'll call you later on, I really gotta run. We should have been at Leanne's house five minutes ago. We're making banners to put up in the market Square."

"Sounds fun," Rinoa remarked softly. "Take care, Zone. Tell Watts I said hi."

"_Will do. Bye."_

Cradling the phone to her chest, Rinoa let out a small sigh. With Zone and Watts on their way to Balamb, Squall's absence wouldn't be too severe; she'd have something to distract herself with, although she would never say that to Squall.

Things were finally looking up, a few weeks ago she was despairing at the news of her powers, but now she was handling it a lot better.

Deciding she would tell Squall about her visitors, she skipped to the door and made her way to his office.

The short walk allowed Rinoa to take the time to think about the coming events, more particularly about how Zone and Watts would react to the news of her powers. She wasn't sure if Squall would agree to her telling them, but she had to. They were her friends; they would accept her regardless of what she was supposedly capable of doing. They knew she wasn't like Ultimecia, Adel, or even Edea when she was a sorceress. She was their princess and they would help her.

Now was the time Rinoa needed to be positive and dissuade any negative thoughts that could cause fatalistic attitudes. She couldn't allow herself to be consumed with every evil characteristic mass-stereotyped by people. Growing up she believed all sorts of things attributed to sorceresses; it was her responsibility to disprove these opinions.

With Ultimecia defeated, there was no one to possess her. And she wouldn't allow herself to consider the possibility of another sorceress. Sorry, but some other past Squall and Rinoa could deal with that. Defeating one future sorceress was all she signed up for.

Finally reaching Squall's office, she pushed open the door and flirtatiously cooed, "Hey Leonhart, you wanna get lucky?"

Faltering in her stride, Rinoa was shocked to find Martine seated at the desk, peering over the computer screen with a frown.

"Oh sorry, I was looking for Squall."

Martine frowned at the girl. "He's in a meeting," he replied to her.

Rinoa took diminutive steps backwards upon seeing the man's irritated look. However, before she reached the door, his voice called her back for a 'word'.

_What could he possibly want with me?_ She thought as she sat down opposite him, feeling sick with anticipation.

Martin smiled at the girl, though she questioned this sincerity. She found it difficult to smile back, but tried her best hoping the man was going to be kind.

"Miss Caraway," Martine started off, aware of the involuntary flinch Rinoa made upon hearing her surname. "Don't take this the wrong way, but exactly how long are you planning on staying?"

They both looked at each other expectantly; Rinoa's cheeks blushing in embarrassment as Martine continued to look at the sorceress in displeasure.

Clearing her throat, Rinoa asked, "Erm, why? Is there a problem?"

"Well, let's be honest; your efforts at the library hardly necessitate a reason for a prolonged stay. But most importantly, you've become more of a distraction to Commander Leonhart. A distraction he could do without," Martine did not hold back in his honesty.

Rinoa could feel a hot flush taking over as her back straightened. Judging by Martine's smirk she presumed the colour of her cheeks were mimicking Carbuncle's red jewel.

"I wasn't aware Squall was becoming distracted. In fact, his being here all the time, I have seen less of him than ever," Rinoa said.

"Well the matter still stands, Squall is at the peak of his career and I don't want him distracted by something or someone he'll only regret later on." Rinoa could hear the iciness in Martine's tone.

"If I were you, I wouldn't consume myself in what Squall will potentially regret. He's a grown man, he can take care of himself," Rinoa remarked, but couldn't help the small voice that began questioning her role in Squall's demise. He had been extremely stressed recently, and her concerns regarding Quistis were now looking very pathetic.

"I'm sure he can, I have full faith in Squall. He has all the qualities of being a fine leader for this Garden. But every man has a weakness, a fire that deters him from moving upwards. It's essential that fire is put out while it's small." Martine was no longer smiling.

Rinoa stared back at the acting Headmaster, unsure of what to reply. Before she could conjure any remarks, the man spoke again.

"Tell me, does Squall know about your past?" He cocked his head to the side as if contemplating the question genuinely.

Rinoa gulped. "Of course he does."

"Oh really? I know Squall is a very forgiving character, but surely even he would have concerns about your stay here considering what you did to G-Garden," Martine retorted, his tone laced with bitterness.

"That was an accident!" Rinoa cried.

"Hn, really? An accident? Is that what you told Squall?" Martine shook his head. "Take advice from someone who knows better. Don't base your relationship on lies. It burns quicker than fire."

"My relationship with Squall is none of your business. You should spend your time worrying about things that do concern you," she tersely replied, appalled that he had the nerve to stick his fat crooked nose into her business.

Martine scoffed in response, cocking a thick sandy-brown eyebrow at her. "Miss Caraway, if my Commander is too consumed with his runaway dropout girlfriend than tending to his duties to this school, then I'm afraid it's very much my business."

The last comment struck a chord with the young sorceress, and Rinoa didn't stick around to hear anymore. The back of her chair smacked to the floor as she rushed to get up. Upon arriving at the door, she held the doorknob to slam it shut, but turned around to get one point across.

"I don't need to justify myself to the likes of you. You are, after all, a traitor. How Cid gave you a second chance is beyond me, but then again, he does have a tendency to take in stray dogs."

With the door slammed shut, Rinoa stood very riled, breathing heavily through her nose, teeth clenched in frustration. She hoped her departure didn't look pathetic, although she should have cared less about what Martine thought. Yet, in all honesty, she had left because she didn't trust her body. The tongue was one dangerous weapon Rinoa had used multiple times and gotten herself into deep Behemoth's shit. What she could now do with her hands was far worse.


End file.
